I truly wish the best for all your family and friends, as I have felt the pain of such before, as well. For his memory, I'll share a bit about him. :)
My grandfather had a stroke when he was about 50, and he was paralyzed in the left side of the body. He also had a screwed up immune system, and could get sick very easily. He had a heart attack in his sleep about a month before he died (before I was born). Before all that, he helped build a number of buildings and structures (particularly bridges) in New Jersey and also owned an ice cream truck, a pluming company, as well as a number of charities. He had very little money, and the money he did have he spent on the family or for others. In any case, my grandfather was so kind. After his stroke, he would sit on the front porch of his home in his old rocking chair with Grandma, smiling, and waving at all the people who came by the house. He loved all of man, and he loved God. My mum used to tell me how him and I were almost exactly alike, in our religion, and humor, and energy level. I never really got to meet him, but I wish so much I could. He appreciated his life and lived it to the fullest. He came over from Italy with nothing, and got married at around the age of 18, while my grandmother was around 16 or 17. He was a great man, with a heart of gold. He's part of the reason I make an effort to love and appreciate everyone, but it's very, very hard sometimes...
Perhaps death is not the end....perhaps it's a new start. It teaches so much. Death of a family member or friend is so eye opening, it puts your life in perspective......It may seem "dumb" to be sharing it here, but it's a way to connect. Reach out to others and perhaps meet someone whom you may help or may help you. The world is a strange, strange place, after all....
