[Forum Game] Help! I'm being _____ by a _____!

[Panquake]

I ride on the alligator, making it a Chevrolet Movie Theater

Help!
I'm being ddosed by Okiver!

[Ad Bot]

[Niff]

Get dosd punk


Help! I went on tumblr!

[Champion]

Rehabilitation.

Help! im being computerized by a metrofangambulationabazagotum agatozipulizatioator

[[insert name here]]

Get computerized.
Help i clicked on Rule34 by a mistake!

[Bomb Kirby]

Clear your history, press the "unsee" button, and move to Alaska.

Help! I'm being stared at by a meme that was so overused it became old less than a week after it was originally created!

[}]Crazy[{]

Onactivate > Player > Chagedatablock > Standard Forumer

Help! I'm being murdered by a Farlands!

[[insert name here]]

Ctrl - k
Help im being drama'd by a noob!

[Zack]

Bring up totally legitimate points and cause the drama to backfire horribly onto the noob.

Help! A wild Shiny Rayquaza appeared and I have no master balls!

[randomtroll39]

I give you a shiny Lugia instead

Help I'm being robbed by a bank!

[Bomb Kirby]

Shut the bank down.

Help! I'm being mauled by a tiger!

[Zack]

Use this gun to----oh. You're already dead. We'll tell your next of kin not to mess with giant ferocious felines.

Help! I'm being offered a crappy hat for 2 refined!

[firestorm]

Quit the game. 

Help! I'm being banked by a robbed!

[Landmineman4000²]

Police the call on the banking robber

Help! I'm being taken into space by an alligator on LSD with 2 midgets for hands and a leprechaun for both his feet and the leprechauns are made of radioactive goo!