[Forum Game] Help! I'm being _____ by a _____!

[Scaredhappyguy]

Ok, so the point of the game is that someone says Help! I'm being _____ by a _____! The lines indicate where you put in your own words to make up a sentence.

For example,

Person1: Help! I'm being shot at by a brony!
Person2: I make the brony butthurt by telling him to forget off with his MLP bullstuff. Help! I'm being raped by a creepbear!
Person3: I throw children scent out of the house, and he makes a run for it. Help! I'm being hurt by a zombie!

And so on...

Ok. I'll start.

Help! I'm being charged in by a demoknight!

[Ad Bot]

[Satan From Wreck-It-Ralph]

I tell you to move left a couple steps. Help! I'm being spammed by a Deve!

[Flatflyer]

I ban him
help, I'm being forgeted by a carrot

[randomtroll39]

I burn it while it's in your star fish
Help I'm being robbed by a gnome!

[KillerCop311]

punt that bitch like a mother forgeter
Help! I'm being raped by a succubus!

[Cybertails1998]

Douse it in holy water to subdue it.

I'm being memed at by a 9gagger someone help

[Electrk.]

No, memes are good for you.

I'm being blanked by a blank!

[Flatflyer]

Have a blanket

I'm being person by a killed

[Snaked_Snake]

I kill the killed.

Help! I'm being attacked by a wild Michael Jackson!

[Kohoutek]

I make him beat it.

Help! I'm being thrown off my course by a NASA rocket/whatever!

[Scaredhappyguy]

I use my psygun to move the rocket over

Help! I'm being executed by a guillotine!

[Lego lad]

I tip the guillotine over

Help! I'm being touched by a hobo!

[Doom Mantis]

Why don't You punch him? (Oh wait You're a T-Rex)
Kick him.

Help I'm being chased by a Shambler from Quake!

[Scaredhappyguy]

I use the SSOODLBF (Scared's Super Omega Orbitual Death Laser from the Blockland Farlands) and blast him to pieces.

Help! I'm being tortured horribly by a nigerian stuffstorm caused by Betelgeuse!

[firestorm]

-sigh- I mention the word autism, leading to a betel fueled spam fest in the forums.
Help! I'm being chased by a guy surfing on a minecart!