This has been bothering me awhile, and those of you lucky few that are on my friends list may recognize this:
Quite recently, I realized that I have two to four friends, maximum. Everyone else is just an acquaintance. This upset me quite a bit, for I prided myself on the fact that I'm such a friendly person, in the real world. So, as a way to fix it, I tried harder to get to now people, but the closer I got to people, the more they stepped back away from me. I felt like a repulsive child, all alone and defenseless, with only my parents to protect me.
The only reason they keep me around is because I'm so good at Chemistry. Everything our teacher puts out, automatically clicks inside of my mind. They use that to their advantage. Always comparing their answers to mine and it is right back to their own work. That and talking to their friends.
If that didn't make it clear to you, then this should help:
Sometimes I feel like a god. I have my own personal fan club (if rather small), but to most it is as if I’m not there. I’m invisible until sought after, silent until my words are wanted. I’m not one to force my presence on others; unless I feel it is absolutely necessary. I’m still there, but I’m part of the wall. I don’t feel powerful, quite the contrary, I feel used and I’m not happy about it.