Question: Can you two act out a scene for me?
Stranger 2: Two
Stranger 1: Honey im homeee!
Stranger 2: Hey honey, did you get the bread?
Stranger 2: We're out of bread. I can't make toast without bread.
Stranger 2: Literally. Like, you can't.
Stranger 1: What.... that cant be...
Stranger 1: I called and said if we needed anything...
Stranger 2: *Opens the cupboard, gesturing wildly towards the empty place the bread would be * No bread, no rbead!
Stranger 2: I didn't get a call...
Stranger 1: I need my toast, honey, you know that!
Stranger 2: Did you call my cell?
Stranger 1: Yeah, your cell.
Stranger 2: I told you not to call my cell.
Stranger 2: I don't answer it at home. Use the landline, Phil.
Stranger 2: That's why we have it.
Stranger 1: Oh stuff! sorry babe.. i just thought..
Stranger 1: wait, where is tim?
Stranger 2: What?
Stranger 1: you are supposed to be picking him up?
Stranger 1: School remember?
Stranger 2: No I thought you were picking him up
Stranger 1: Rebecca...
Stranger 2: On the way back from the store
Stranger 2: I swear you said that
Stranger 1: Come on..
Stranger 1: No
Stranger 2: Phil.
Stranger 2: Phil, you said you'd pick Tim up today. I've picked him up all week.
Stranger 1: Gah.. damn it. im just losing it today
Stranger 1: Well.. should i go look for him?
Stranger 1: He couldnt have gotten far
Stranger 2: No
Stranger 2: He can wait a while
Stranger 2: I have a present for you...
Stranger 1: Ohh.. what is it?
Stranger 2: It's a present.
Stranger 2: Close your eyes.
Stranger 1: Ok.. *closes eyes*
Stranger 2: *Takes out a big brown package from under the kitchen table, and hands it to Phil*
Stranger 2: Open it...
Stranger 2: It's the bloody head of Tiffany, Phil.
Stranger 2: I cut it off myself.
Stranger 2: I KNOW WHAT YOUVE BEEN DOING WITH HER
Stranger 1: Oh god..*slowly unwraps* Nooo...
Stranger 2: NOW SHE CAN SUCK YOUR DIRTY rooster WHENEVER YOU WANT
Stranger 2: YOU PIG
Stranger 1: Blood... this is fresh rebecca
Stranger 2: Her body is in the bathroom. I'm filling the tub with acid. They'll never know she was here.
Stranger 1: ... You animal! I went over to her house to get a papers for my boss!!!
Stranger 2: IS THAT WHAT THEYRE CALLING IT NOW
Stranger 1: I'm calling the police right now!
Stranger 2: Don't touch that phone, Phil!
Stranger 1: Yes, papers! I swear rebecca!
Stranger 1: I was always faithful to you!
Stranger 2: Then why did you put on your LUCKY UNDERPANTS before going, Phil?
Stranger 2: Those are for US.
Stranger 2: I know what those mean to you.
Stranger 2: It means you're ready for love. You told me that yourself.
Stranger 1: ... forget..
Stranger 1: I - i- im ...
Stranger 1: I - sorry.. i just.. i couldnt help myself
Stranger 2: You disgust me, Phil.
Stranger 2: And set the head down. You're getting blood all over my rug.
Stranger 1: I just find myself staring at her luscious breasts in the office... i cant help myself..
Stranger 1: Oh, alright
Stranger 1: *sets head on table*
Stranger 2: What's wrong with MY breasts, Phil? Aren't they enough for you?!
Stranger 1: well they are 36 A...
Stranger 1: soo.. i mean..
Stranger 1: you know.
Stranger 2: *Grabs a pill bottle from a nearby drawer, popping five with a swig of whiskey* I've been up all night, I can't stop thinking about you loving her! You're sick!
Stranger 2: I'LL KILL YOU, PHIL
Stranger 2: *Grabs a butcher knife from next to the sink*
Stranger 1: Calm down honey.. i didnt even go down on her...
Stranger 1: I just felt her... nice.. soft.. delicious.. um
Stranger 2: Like you're any good at it anyway!
Stranger 2: THAT'S NOT HELPING
Stranger 1: God damn it.. i made a mistake.. forgive me honey..
Stranger 2: You'll pay. You'll pay in your blood.
Stranger 1: .. come on.. lets calm down..
Stranger 2: I already killed Rebecca. There's no going back.
Stranger 2: They'll take me to jail, Phil.
Stranger 2: I mean Tiffany
Stranger 2: I'm Rebecca.
Stranger 2: WHO AM I?!
Stranger 1: I can hide that...
Stranger 1: wait..
Stranger 1: waiiit just a second..
Stranger 1: those arent 36 a breasts...
Stranger 1: those.. are tiffanys..
Stranger 2: PHIL...
Stranger 1: What the hell did you do to my wife!!!
Stranger 2: Your eyes.. They're playing tricks on you...
Stranger 1: You...
Stranger 2: No, Phil, it's me...
Stranger 1: you..... zfkjsdhfksjadhfaksjghsklfg
Stranger 1: How...
Stranger 1: It cant be...
Stranger 2: It's me, your wife...
Stranger 2: I swear...
Stranger 1: Alright.. sorry.. need to calm down..
Stranger 1: *sigh*
Stranger 2: You FOOL
Stranger 1: ...
Stranger 2: REBECCA WAS GETTING BETWEEN US
Stranger 2: I AM YOUR WIFE NOW
Stranger 2: I've taken her ID. Her birth certificate.
Stranger 1: N-n-no...
Stranger 2: Yes!
Stranger 1: it cant be..
Stranger 1: i didnt want to..
Stranger 2: YOUR WIFE IS DEAD, PHIL
Stranger 1: i wanted her...
Stranger 1: I LOVE HER!!!
Stranger 2: You KISSED me. That MEANS SOMETHING
Stranger 1: SOMETHING!
Stranger 1: But not everything..
Stranger 1: i admit, i am a manwhore, but what can you do?
Stranger 2: I can kill your wife. And your kid.
Stranger 2: And have you all for myself
Stranger 1: Tim.. hes dead?
Stranger 2: Almost
Stranger 1: what did you do with him!
Stranger 1: YOU ANIMAL!
Stranger 2: I have him hooked up to a fan in the living room. In 30 more rotations the noose will tighten and he'll die.
Funniest stuff ever.
