truth
It started with scenes of beautiful countryside and lovely fluffy bunnies. Then I suddenly burst out of a bunny's head and start walking around. The background suddenly changes to dark, creepy forests as I walk along.
Suddenly the facemouth creature from the link in my sig comes right out of the loving nowhere and tries to kill me. Just as it's about to crush my skull between it's jaws Gabe Newell bursts through the ground and fires an Ak-47 made of his own stomach fat at the thing. As it lies dying on the ground Gabe interjects copies of Episode 3 in it's face, killing it instantly.
I'm about to thank him when I suddenly teleport to a massive city. I somehow set fire to a newspaper because I could. Suddenly a rip in the space-time continuum causes a portal to Hell, setting free Saten himself and his minions. He then laughs at me for being a doucebag, and then unleases a mindforget vision so forgeted up, I can only describe it as the sort of thing you'd expect Tim Burton to draw whilst doing LSD.
Gabe Newell flies in to save us, but is roasted by Satan. Picking up Gabe's fat AK-47, I shoot the Devil in the face, and it turns out he's allergic to fat. I then fire some more fat bullets at Satan untill he suddenly explodes and shuts the hell portal.
Everyone comes out of hiding and thanks me. I mourn for the loss of Gabe Newell, the only source of Episode Three. Then everything explodes for no reason.
