Seriously , if you think that you are going trough trouble at this stage already , then you are probably best off dead. Because if you go on living , you are going to hate life so much you'll make the people around you sad too. Also , fun thing , people with a good , and filosophical view on life should not fear death , but running into it is a stupid reaction. This wold could be seen as a very goodly coded "game" , not by god , please , but it'd be a shame if you left this world of wonder , where all the details are so perfect.
Well shame , it'd just be egoistical , unobservant and handicapped. You are the handicap. Your parents actually managed to get trough stuff that you will never face because you are going to kill yourself. You are of a handicapped-er and stupider viewpoint of life than they are. You ruined the lives of alot of non-handicapped people.
They should jail people who show signs of Self Delete , and then give them life support etc to make them live as long as possible. Seriously.
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