Monocle got stalked today. :c

[Monocle]

So, today I went to downtown Chicago, and while I was walking down Michigan ave, there was a magician with a sweet ass shirt on, so I walked up to him and told him I liked it, anyway, we got to chit chatting and he explained some magic tricks to me, as well as explained to me how street performers actually get hourly wages on top of the tips they make from suckers on the street. Well, we talked for about 30 minutes, and then I walked away, well, I walked to the Jamba Juice on the corner of Michigan and State st, and I was ordering my normal (Razmatazz with an energy shot), well, I turn around and there's this street performer again. I grab my drink and leave, I then start walking towards Navy Pier (Straight walk down Michigan ave to Lake Shore Drive), and I walk into the Hagen Daaz store in there, and I wait for the girls I was with to order, well, as I sit down with them, this guy is standing outside the window of the store. I was fairly creeped out at this point, seeing as how in order to get from Michigan Ave near the Water Tower to Michigan/State is about a 30 minute walk, and Michigan/State to Lake Shore Drive/Michigan is another 30 minutes, as we're leaving, I look at him and give him a look that clearly states 'back the forget off', well, we walk towards Ogilvie Train Station so I can get the girls home, and we get onto our train (BNSF line), and we walk into the train, and sit up top towards a window so they can take their pictures and stuff, well, 1 minute before the train starts moving, this magician gets on our train, same car as ours, goes to the upstairs at the other end of the train and sits down. When we reach our stop, he gets off as well. At this point, I was sick of him, so I find him in the parking lot, and I say to him 'listen, you've been following us all day, if you don't start walking back towards that train and back the forget off, I will not only call the police, but I will make sure your wizardry days are over, because you need to use your hands for that bullstuff' so he says 'ok' and when we pull out of our train station, I drive in a ton of side streets and stuff to make sure I shake him if he was still following us.


Tldr; forget off wizard


Inb4wizard

[Ad Bot]

[_Rave_]

that's creepy :c

[Jetlok]

he was going to rape you because he told you his secrets. a magician never reveals his secret or else he has to rape them.

[Monocle]

that's creepy :c

No kidding, when we got to the girls house, they started crying.

he was going to rape you because he told you his secrets. a magician never reveals his secret or else he has to rape them.

He didn't tell me secrets, he just told me how it works, lol.

[Iban]

Summary: Lonely man follows Monocle and friends after a friend conversation. Monocle acts like a tough guy in front of friends. All of his friends are impressed. Monocle gets his richard wet.

[Monocle]

Summary: Lonely man follows Monocle and friends after a friend conversation. Monocle acts like a tough guy in front of friends. All of his friends are impressed. Monocle gets his richard wet.

I don't think you understand, this man was probably 45 years old, and he was a street magician, he had a wedding ring on his hand, and he had a full tip jar.

In terms of getting my richard wet, untrue, I did not go with my girlfriend, and the only person whom has permission to wet my richard is my girlfriend.

I wasn't acting like a tough guy, I was telling him to forget off because he was being a creep.

[Joekirk]

Is he a wizard?

[Kira100000]

Sounds creepy

also probably this

he was going to rape you because he told you his secrets. a magician never reveals his secret or else he has to rape them.

[fred da kiko]

you should have gone to him with as straight face. looked him in the eye. yell "ALAKAZAM MOTHER forgetER" and punch him in the face.

[Jetlok]

or you could have challenged him to a duel. zappy zip zoo!

or a richard fight.

[Qwepir]

Summary: Lonely man follows Monocle and friends after a friend conversation. Monocle acts like a tough guy in front of friends. All of his friends are impressed. Monocle gets his richard wet.

Most of those off-topic threads you made involved you trying to act like a tough guy, so calling him out on that is ironic.

[fred da kiko]

or you could have challenged him to a duel. zappy zip zoo!

or a richard fight.

magic duel.....only with a gun.

[Jetlok]

magic duel.....only with a gun.

no. like. getting wands and shooting zappy spells at each other.

[fred da kiko]

no. like. getting wands and shooting zappy spells at each other.

yeah, only monocle's wand is a gun and it shoots bullets, not spells.

[Monocle]

Is he a wizard?

Yas.

you should have gone to him with as straight face. looked him in the eye. yell "ALAKAZAM MOTHER forgetER" and punch him in the face.

Oh my god, that's awesome. He was doing some trick with fake bunnies, and he had them in my hand, and I straight stared him in the eyes the whole time, and he stopped halfway through his demon spell cast and said 'you know, you're a very intimidating person, next trick'

or you could have challenged him to a duel. zappy zip zoo!

or a richard fight.

Your schwartz is as big as mine!

yeah, only monocle's wand is a gun and it shoots bullets, not spells.

My magic wand is a straw from starbucks that shoots coffee beans, actually.