Guns Akimbo Akimbo
I tried to make that once. I failed horribly. Mostly because the player only has two hands.
Wait. The player has 4. Normal and hookhands.
Of course, animations move each pair (left pair and right pair) as one.
As for the other ideas, there was that Pi guy's ak47, Gravity Cat's Bonecrusher, Thor's Hammer, and Niddhogg.