OffTopic Text Adventure - CHAPTER 4

[ShadowYoshi294]

* Using either the key or your bare fists, charge into the bear and stab/punch it.

[Ad Bot]

[Skorpion]

*Kill the loving bear already

*Slash its throat with the key

[Neon]

It occurs to you that you don't have the physical ability to kill a polar bear.

[steve5451]

*Stab it with key

[KILLERBUNNY]

*Pat the Polar Bear gently on the head and run away.
*Stop running and burrow a hole in the snow

[ShadowYoshi294]

* Quick! Stab it with the key!

[Cucumber!]

* Insert the key into the polar bear's ass!

[Skorpion]

* Insert the key into the polar bear's ass!

*Unlocks into another world where there are hundreds of keys and only one will unlock your arse.

[Neon]

You attempt to sever the neck of the bear with the key.


The head of the bear loosens. M comes out.

He inquires if you would kindly cut that the forget out before he has to kill you again.

He says to help yourself to the bear meat.

He mentions something about the laborious task of gutting a bear and living inside it for hours.

He flies away.

Sometimes you just have to point your gun at bitches to keep them in order.

[Skorpion]

*Search inside the bear incase he left anything inside

[Neon]

Besides the copious amounts of bear meat, there is also a hockey stick and a researchographic magazine.
You shudder to think what he was doing in there. What should you do?

[KILLERBUNNY]

*Before you enter the bear, try checking the inside for semen or other bodily fluids. Just ignore the bear blood.

[steve5451]

*Masturbate to the research.

[Skorpion]

*arm self with the hockey stick, salvage any decent fold outs in the research mag then burn it for heat and cook the meat.

[masterockets]

*Become polar bear