I have told people the way I feel, and I know the way they react, I know that people simply cannot provide the help I desire. In all honesty, I probably won't kill myself because I'm too afraid of death. But I know I've screwed up my life to the point of no return.
Then you're in the same boat as me, except you need to try, I'm terrified of death, but if you keep going like this, you will find a point where being afraid of death no longer matters because you become more afraid of living due to the pain involved in doing so. I've already reached that point and my moods fluctuate but a few days ago i started doing stuff with my tablet and now I feel a lot better, I know I won't be the same, but every experience changes you regardless of if you notice it or not.
