(officially the very old and belligerent great grandfather)
WHEN I WAS JUST 16 BACK IN WWI WHEN OLD CLINTON SENT US BOYS IN I CAPTURED A WHOLE PLATOON ENTIRE PLATOON WITH OUR OFFICER BLEEDING OVER MY SHOULDER AND WHILE CARRYING TWO BIG BROWNING MACHINEGUNS IN EACH HAND
I BLEW A GUY'S HEAD OFF AND I SHOT UP SOME CRATES FULL OF STINKY CHEESE AND love TOYS LAID OUT ON A TABLE
IT TURNED OUT IT WAS A FRENCH PLATOON ANYWAY BUT WE SAVED THEIR ASSES NEXT TIME WHICH I ALSO FOUGHT IN BACK IN '46
GOOD OL LADY LIBERTY HUH KID