Electro, trying to figure out how to improve yourself by asking an internet forum is really not a smart idea. All you're going to get is unkind remarks from those who have beef and chicken with you, as well as more drama and situations where you'll have to defend yourself.
I would recommend you don't take what people say here to heart as reflecting what you truly are like, because the only outcome of this is you feeling worse than you did before. Please. Don't do this to yourself.