Alright kids, let's have a challenge. Who can make the most ludicrous marysue possible?
EDIT: I'll go first

Meet Lily haruko, a 16-year-old who is in college because she is a genius. When she was a baby her town was attacked by the *
AMBIGUOUS EVEL* and her parents died and she was left in an orphanage that was also a dojo and was raised by the swordfighters. When she turned 13 they gave her a samurai sword of her own, and it was passed down through generations of her family. It carries a mysterious power, so mysterious not even she knows what. Her hair is blue, and I was lazy and didn't want to draw a super fancy gold dress but she has one, also her eyes are orange. Also did I mention she has wings because she was just born that way
TM. She's shy and also nice but has a short temper
because I needed to put a character flaw SOMEWHERE, and later when she's fighting the *
AMBIGUOUS EVEL* you learn that she has telepathy and also telekinesis and also the power of light magic, which is made more powerful with the sword.
she's also kissed naruto
-Also please for forget's sake don't put this on the list, this can be the little secret of everybody who reads through this topic-