My parents have grown apart

[Katadeus]

My parents stayed together for the sake of my sister and I for quite a while longer than they would have otherwise. It was extremely difficult for both of them, and they still resent eachother, but are definitely on speaking terms.
You can't blame them, no matter how hard it might be for you.

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[Bisjac]

well marriage is a business contract. one or both of them aren't benefiting as much as they use to, or planned to be at this point.
so the contract much be adjusted.

love hasnt been relevant to the process since it was made for a wife slave trade thousands of years ago. i mean if you loved someone, combining bank accounts and insurance plans is just paperwork XD

[hodot]

my parents split up when i was 8. i was ok with it cause i have awesome extended family now

[Planr]

well marriage is a business contract. one or both of them aren't benefiting as much as they use to, or planned to be at this point.
so the contract much be adjusted.

this kind of mindset is exactly what destroys most marriages.
marriage is meant to be a covenant. it's not about what you get, but what you can give. a person who isn't willing to put their spouse before themself is in for a very tough and rocky marriage.


brickmaster, sorry this is happening to you man. i'll be praying for you.

[DrenDran]

some marriages cannot be fixed.

The idea is that if you stayed with someone for 23 years, there was and may still be reasons to continue staying with them.

well marriage is a business contract. one or both of them aren't benefiting as much as they use to, or planned to be at this point.
so the contract much be adjusted.

love hasnt been relevant to the process since it was made for a wife slave trade thousands of years ago. i mean if you loved someone, combining bank accounts and insurance plans is just paperwork XD

Unfortunately most modern societies give privileges to married couples that you just can't get any other way. Family access to someone in a hospital, tax benefits, inheritance, anything having to do with parenting. It's annoying how the gay marriage movement basically says "eh, that's all fine as long as we can do it too." They're expanding an obsolete system rather than trying to have it broken down and reimagined. That said if republicans are already having trouble dealing with gay marriage, they sure as hell will oppose any sweeping reforms.

[Brickmaster]

remember in the op I said they aren't divorcing, just moving away from each other to think about stuff. it's just an innocent way of telling me they're getting divorced probably, or a potential divorce.

[Bisjac]

this kind of mindset is exactly what destroys most marriages.
marriage is meant to be a covenant. it's not about what you get, but what you can give. a person who isn't willing to put their spouse before themself is in for a very tough and rocky marriage.

well its the modern world. people see things for what they really are.

[DrenDran]

this kind of mindset is exactly what destroys most marriages.
marriage is meant to be a covenant. it's not about what you get, but what you can give. a person who isn't willing to put their spouse before themself is in for a very tough and rocky marriage.

If they love each other, they'll stay together without needing a legal document to that effect.

Marriage is just a contract on top of a relationship. More and more people (probably disproportionately men) today basically treat marriage as "hey, we've been living together a few years, you wanna get married? it'd sure be convenient" rather than a life changing event. Since it doesn't really change the relationship all that much anymore, all that ever changed was the social status of the relationship and the attitudes towards it.

[Evar678]

Damn this sucks. I'm one of the kids that has only ever known one of my parents. (Dad left 2 months after I was born. Never saw the guy, don't really want to.)

Though, when my mom got married to another guy when I was about 9-10, he was like the coolest guy I'd ever met. I'd come to be really connected to my stepdad, even starting to call him 'dad' instead of his regular name like my brother did.

Eventually, about 3 years ago they split up for reasons I never fully came to understand. Even now I miss him, but I guess I'm just used to not having anyone there in the first place.

So yeah, I've sort of been there, it really sucks and I hope your parents can figure something out in the future.

[XR-7]

My parents will be married for 20 years in May, and they were married at 19 and 20 years old. The times were really tough back then, but they pushed through them while pulling me around (I was conceived four months after they married, and born when money was an exceptional issue).

I'm sorry about your parents, OP. Although I've never first-person witnessed a divorce before, there are several in my surrounding family (at least 8 that I can think of, great-grandparents on down). I hope all turns out for the best.

[DrenDran]

Damn this sucks. I'm one of the kids that has only ever known one of my parents. (Dad left 2 months after I was born. Never saw the guy, don't really want to.)

Though, when my mom got married to another guy when I was about 9-10, he was like the coolest guy I'd ever met. I'd come to be really connected to my stepdad, even starting to call him 'dad' instead of his regular name like my brother did.

Eventually, about 3 years ago they split up for reasons I never fully came to understand. Even now I miss him, but I guess I'm just used to not having anyone there in the first place.

So yeah, I've sort of been there, it really sucks and I hope your parents can figure something out in the future.

Past statistics have shown that in the U.S. 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second, and 73% of third marriages end in divorce

So yeah, only about a third of second marriages work, and a forth of third marriages.
I can't help but think: why even bother at that point lol

[Brickmaster]

I'm sorry about your parents, OP. Although I've never first-person witnessed a divorce before, there are several in my surrounding family (at least 8 that I can think of, great-grandparents on down). I hope all turns out for the best.

thank you

[Oasis]

My parents split when I was 3. Sometimes I wish I had a normal life, especially when I have to choose who's house to go to for holidays and stuff now that I'm in college, but then again, all the experiences I got because they went their separate ways were extremely valuable, and I can't say I'd wish for it to be any different.

Plus, my dad had my half-sister with his now ex-wife, and she's pretty damn awesome. Would have been an only child if they hadn't divorced. Que sera sera I guess.

[Foxscotch]

how old are you OP??

[childofdarkness016]

how old are you OP??

-2036

at least read his profile >.>

anyway yeah this kind of thing sucks

my parents had a pretty bad fight last year and were going to separate but didn't, mostly for the sake of my sister and me