The pun megathread - Zombies are too braindead to laugh at this

[the hacker]

What do you get when Alan Moore designs a house shaped like a dinosaur?

Rorschach.

[Ad Bot]

[the hacker]

Read from Stocking onward:
http://forum.blockland.us/index.php?topic=255006.msg7410948#msg7410948
At the time this happened I didn't know what vore was. Looking back at this now made me laugh harder than I should've.

[the hacker]

Bump. Noticed some users are a bit punny right now.

[querty67]

Have a nice trip, see you next FALL
My friends bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.   
Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
I used to be a banker but I lost interest

[the hacker]

I don't like Badspot's avatar. I Dredd its appearance.

[Kimon²]

you know i thought of an amazing pun earlier but i cant remember it

such is the tragic nature of life

[Midevil Warrior]

I tried to make a 9/11 joke but it was just plane wrong
I tried to make a black person joke but it was too dark
I tried to make a Mexican joke but it just wouldn't cross my mind
I tried to make an Asian joke but I couldn't see it

[Zanaran2]

Why are so many kids becoming drug addicts early in their lives?

High school.

[TristanLuigi]

Why are so many kids becoming drug addicts early in their lives?

High school.

that's not a pun, it's a true sta-
ooooohhhh i see

[Zanaran2]

Where do young mages go to learn?

Elementary school.

[the hacker]

Bump.

[Lego lad]

Do you like art? I can't Rembrandt

[Rigel]

[1:19:59 PM] Big Boss: The magician got so frustrated that he pulled his hare out.
[1:20:28 PM] Big Boss: A midget psychic escaped prison.
[1:20:33 PM] Big Boss: He was a small medium at large.
[1:20:56 PM] Big Boss: I forgot how to throw a boomerang.
[1:20:58 PM] Big Boss: But it came back to me.
[1:21:19 PM] Big Boss: A book just fell on my head.
[1:21:24 PM] Big Boss: I only have my shelf to blame.
[1:21:31 PM] Big Boss: PUN CONVENTION.

He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
[1:24:31 PM] Big Boss: When William joined the army.
[1:24:35 PM] Big Boss: He disliked the phrase.
[1:24:36 PM] Big Boss: Fire at will.
[1:25:13 PM] Big Boss: A prisoner's favorite punctiation mark is the period.
[1:25:17 PM] Big Boss: It marks the end of his sentence.
[1:25:58 PM] Big Boss: When Peter Pan punches, they Neverland.
[1:26:25 PM] Big Boss: A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to the hospital.
[1:26:43 PM] Big Boss: When his grandmother called to ask how he was, the nurse said "No change yet."

The midget psychic one is my favorite.

[Rigel]

under rated topic

[daracer64]

I tried to make a 9/11 joke but it was just plane wrong
I tried to make a black person joke but it was too dark
I tried to make a Mexican joke but it just wouldn't cross my mind
I tried to make an Asian joke but I couldn't see it