I've never had coffee in my entire life
Also espio, you should come to america! Land of the free and the fat! Here, we have people that will throw actually good insults your way instead of saying something extremely loving stupid, laughing, and everyone else joining in as you say that they do in your schools.
And problems are usually settled with fights in the worse schools (Which you'll probably end up going to with your luck.), which in my eyes, is the right way to go. You should come to Florida, the weather's always sunny, thunderstorms, or hurricanes. We also seem to breed the worst psychopaths along with the least functional handicaps! Not to mention the wannabe ghetto people acting all cool that will be knocked on their ass with a simple slap on the wrist!
But seriously, come to America. There's a better chance of you having a better life than some stuff-hole European country.
Possible alternatives:
Canada (Trees and moose EVERYWHERE. Also free healthcare.)
Australia (Stupid government, stupid wildlife, silly rabbits, but bad-ass people.)
Japan (Age of consent is small as hell and they have some REALLY crazy things there. Good crazy.)