Nothing new yet, but I thought I might as well translate for you guys, since I speak both normal English and Bogan English.
i may need to hire a cryptologist
I cannot even understand most of this
Red and Green are both girls, as a sidenote. I broke up Green's message in paragraphs since there's a lot. Green is not Brooke, either.
Red: People are truly friends when they falsely accuse you of ditching them to see other people, followed by threats of violence and name calling. I might go with you, but I'm not your bitch to walk around wherever you like. If my other friends are around as well, I'm going to hang out with them too. You can't tell me what to do since you're not my girlfriend (Ed Note: Not talking about green; rather about another guy always causing drama). Happy New Year everybody!
Green: You're just a selfish bitch. You had every reasons to leave, but instead you decided to start a giant stufffest over nothing. I had only just charged my phone when you took it and threw it, followed by looking at all my messages. The phone number on the message you got upset over doesn't even have a name attached, you dumb cunt! You have no right to touch my phone, just like I have no right to touch yours.
forget you. You ditched me and ruined my plans for New Years. I could have gone out clubbing (Ed Note: Means to go to multiple clubs late at night, drinking a lot; a successful club night with you getting forgeted), but instead I decided to be a good friend and go to your place. All you wanted to do was stay at that party, since you don't like staying at my place. Ioz (Ed Note: Probably a misspelling of Isabella) and I didn't want to go to that party, but we went anyway so we wouldn't cause any trouble for you. That party messed up my entire night.
Who even writes status updates like this, trying to say that I'm the cunt? I hope everybody eventually learns about the real you. You're self-obsessed. I didn't do anything to you, so don't try and ditch me or say I'm a cunt. You should delete this, since stuff happens all the time. I'm loving tired of all your bullstuff. If you hadn't of walked home like an immature bitch, things wouldn't have blown out of proportion. You could have talked about it, but instead you made things much worse, such as calling me a slut. You can't even handle the alcohol you drink. It's lucky you had only gotten as far as the drive way.
If you want disrespect me, then come and get your stuff. Be mature, because I was the one who did all the stuff I was asked to. Delete your statuses, and thank you for ruining my New Years Eve.
