once i was taking a fat stuff
like
fatand i had just eaten a bag of
hot fries and my loving starfish was like, on fire because they basically just went right through me
so like, im sitting there, blasting out fiery turds at the poor toilet bowl and breathing heavily right
someone walks in and asks what the forget the smell is and i lose my spaghetti
i just kind of pull my legs up so they can't see me, i'm still blasting out turds at this point
my stealth attempt failed, cause i let out a ghastly, otherworldly fart that smelled like it came from the sulphury depths of the nether
this forgeter starts laughing his ass off and says "i can see you dude"
i just put my legs down, hang my head in shame and continue my hellstuff
once the guy leaves i decide to wipe my ass
i get like a wad of toilet paper and take a swipe at my asscrack
i look at it out of morbid curiosity and habit (i like to inspect my wipes)
and like, it was loving red. like, the toilet paper and all of the soupy stuff on this paper was
red, motherforgeters.
i keep wiping and after about five or six attempts, my starfish finally comes out clean. i take about 5 more squares of toilet paper and dab my starfish to see if there's anything left, and there's a few spots of blood left on the toilet paper. i cringe, get up and flush. The toilet is permanently dyed red at this point
i wash my hands and leave the bathroom and there's a group of like 7 people loving staring at me as a leave laughing hard as forget
from then on i was known for hiding from someone in the bathroom while taking a rank stuff
that was second grade ;_;
