Survival 101: SHANK'D

[Blockchip]

Keep virginity

[Ad Bot]

[ThatRandomGuy]

bash the door with the zombie

Bash the corpse with the zombie door

Bash the zombie with the door

Keep virginity

You decide to pick the door up and bash anything in your sight, launching the corpse into the window and breaking it; You ain't paying for that. Whilst bashing the bodies you loose all confidence and decide to keep your virginity

look for some bbq potato chips and eat them

You walk into your messy kitchen and find some potato crisps, they aren't BBQ and expired 3 years ago.

INVENTORY:

• An almost empty bottle of beer
• Cold Chinese food you ordered 2 hours ago
• Virginity
• Expired potato crisps

STATUS:

• 100 health
• Pissed your pants, need to take a shower
• Don't have to take a dump

[Lego lad]

take shower with chips

[Space1255]

forget dead zombie

[Copy Kirby]

Decide to stop being a moron and find a gun & Ammo

[gebenuwell]

find cheesesticks

[ThatRandomGuy]

take shower with chips

Decide to stop being a moron and find a gun & Ammo

You tear open the box and take a shower with the chips, that isn't going to make you clean dummy. The chips have attracted a lone zombie and it scares you stuffless. You begin to look around for weapons like an intelligent person

INVENTORY:

• An almost empty bottle of beer
• Cold Chinese food you ordered 2 hours ago
• Virginity
• Expired potato crisps box

STATUS:

• 100 health
• Pissed your pants, covered in crumbs, need to take a shower
• Bowels were evacuated by zombie scaring you

[Cone²]

pick up a magnum, shoot the zombie, then buttforget it

[Copy Kirby]

get the infection by loving the zombie

[ThatRandomGuy]

pick up a magnum, shoot the zombie, then buttforget it

get the infection by loving the zombie

You don't find a magnum but drag your kitchen knife, you throw it at the zombie and it miraculously kills the zombie. You decide to forget the dead zombie, you necrophilia fueled idiot.

You begin loving the zombie, you need Jesus, and a man who looks straight out of Metro: 2033 facepalms while watching you. You begin to scream as your richard looks like a shriveled prune but at least you lost your virginity, you sick bastard

INVENTORY:

• An almost empty bottle of beer
• Cold Chinese food you ordered 2 hours ago
• Expired potato crisps box

STATUS:

• 100 health
• Pissed your pants, covered in crumbs, need to take a shower
• Bowels were evacuated by zombie scaring you
• Infected with zombie STDs

[gebenuwell]

pour beer on bowels
yell "ITS CALLED A special interest" at facepalm man

[Copy Kirby]

use the beer bottle before coming a zombie.
Go full last man standing
Kill a bunch of zombies with a broken beer bottle and look awesome while doing it,

[Space1255]

Kill facepalmer

[ThatRandomGuy]

pour beer on bowels
yell "ITS CALLED A special interest" at facepalm man

You pour the rest of your beer on your bowels, getting soaked with beer. Facepalm man is watching in confusion so you yell "IT'S CALLED A special interest" at him.

INVENTORY:

• Cold Chinese food you ordered 2 hours ago
• Expired potato crisps box

STATUS:

• 100 health
• Pissed your pants and soaked with beer, covered in crumbs, covered in cum, need to take a shower
• Bowels were evacuated by zombie scaring you
• Infected with zombie STDs

[gebenuwell]

tell him to go