Author Topic: tell me your life history  (Read 3224 times)


like the board game or the cereal

i was born then i went to school then i got a job the end

I was born, got into school, shagged some bitches, got job, graduated school. To be continued.

i'm a garbage boy made from garbage


 i lived in a good ghetto with a good school and then i moved to california and my mom's boyfriend at the time got me into a private school that made me write with my right hand instead of my left and now i dont know how to write well with either and then in third grade my friend got suspended for threatening to rape another kid's sister (which he didnt. i was with him for the entirety of recess.) and about a month after that my mom broke up with her boyfriend of six years and we moved again halfway through third grade and then i met this boy named jack and then another one named chandler (who i lost contact with. any of you know a guy named chandler? should be 17 or so by now. 11th grade. we played halo 3 a lot and i would very much like to relive it with an old friend)  and six months later or so a new kid moved into my neighborhood and i still talk to him on occasion hes chill and then around fourth grade my mom got a new boyfriend (she actually had another one between the first one and this one but hes boring so whatev) and then i moved back to texas  for fifth grade where i then met this kid named james who i thought was my friend for at least half the semester, but then after I had to leave school for a month (mom broke up with her absolute piece of stuff boyfriend, we had to move into my grandma's house on the other side of the city for a month), the forget-ass decided to start a rumor that I was a friend. loving cunt. Cue water day near the end of the year - I, and a female(?) classmate who I hated were to be paired up together. Teacher asked us if we'd rather be grouped up with a another duo instead, knowing that we didn't get along very well. We both agreed, and then I met a dude who I wish I befriended sooner. Corbin, the class clown. Dude was suuuper nice, didn't give a forget about the rumors, and ended up being a generally pretty cool guy. And on to sixth grade. Lots more kids, 2/3s of them from different schools than I was in. That 2/3 realized that most of the kids from my elementary were total starfishs. Ended up being good friends with lots of the kids from the other schools.

HOWEVER, my first two classes each day had teachers that were complete cunts.
First teacher
>Humiliates you in front of the class
>Keeps the class in after the bell rings because ONE student was being disruptive
>Doesnt care that your next teacher locks you out of the class if you're not there by the time the next bell rings
Second teacher
>Locks you out of her class (which was on the other end of the campus) if you're there after the bell rings
>You can be playing the cello perfectly and she'd still find a reason to yell at you

Third class and everything afterwards was sweet. English teacher had a double period, reading and writing. Reading was basically a "ok take a break and read whatever" class for me. Got A's by not doing anything aside from answering the occasional quiz or test.

There was another class clown in my third and fourth period. Unlike the one I mentioned earlier, he was super disruptive. Interrupted the teacher, started singing randomly, loudly told yo mama jokes to whoever was next to him (and likely trying to work). Didn't realize it at the time but the English teacher (super nice woman) snapped one day and had the class tell yo mama jokes to the kid.

Few months into sixth grade I transferred to an online school. Easier on my sanity and had higher standards for work. This continued until last summer and then I moved to Minnesota and now I'm here.

born
"oh hey clubfoot"
fixed that (1 minute old)
"oh hey closed stomach valve"
fixed that (1 month old)
"oh hey forgeted genetics"
working on it (3 years old)
"oh hey, we didn't fix your club foot completely, lets leave you in a cast for a month"
fixed that (4 years old)
"oh hey, your dog died"
forget (5 years old)
"oh hey, you lost a game of tug-of-war and are now bleeding from your forehead"
permanent scar (5 years old)
"oh hey, we gave your dog away"
forget (7 years old)
"oh hey, we're moving"
alrighty (7 years old)
"oh hey, that horse is holding you by your hair"
forget that hurt (8 years old)
"oh hey, all of your cats have either ran away, been given away, or died on the streets"
forget (8 years old)
"oh hey, we're moving back to our old house because the siblings on your dad's side of the family forgeted everything up"
what the forget (9 years old)
"oh hey, they put you in one of the worst classes"
help (10 years old)
"oh hey, your principal and dean got arrested for embezzlement, time to switch to ANOTHER CHARTER SCHOOL"
hurray (11 years old)
"oh hey, you broke your arm during a birthday party"
fixed that (12 years old)
"oh hey, it looks like you forgeted up your first impression and now nobody likes you"
forget (12 years old)
"oh hey, we're putting you in a forgeted up conglomeration of a writing and reading class taught by the founder of the school that's going through menopause"
help (13 years old)
"oh hey, you met what might be your best friends, too bad they're all a year behind you. good luck in highschool!"
mr. lonely (14 years old)
"oh hey, you completely embarrassed yourself in front of your crush and now act like an absolute handicap in front of anyone you have feelings for"
god why (14 years old)
"oh hey, your friends are back, and you've made new ones. cool."
hurray (15 years old)
"oh hey, you're gonna go blind without any chance of it stopping or being fixed"
why (15 years old)
"oh hey, the family is basically broke and is at constant risk of losing everything"
why (15 years old)
"oh hey, you forgeted up your freshman year and now have summer school after your sophomore year"
ezpz (15 years old)
"oh hey, your grades are steadily dropping along with your will to be a person"
help (16 years old - present)


"oh hey, a topic asking about our life history."
sounds neat (present)

i was born a mistake and that's all that my life has been made of ever since

1-6
spider infested house it was kinda gay but i like spiders now so
also i got beat up in preschool a lot
7-12
literally nothing happened nobody cares other than those two kids I beat up
oh also we moved out of spider hell
13-15
edgy period
got a gf
she forgeted me up
lost a gf
was a weaboo edgelord forget
16
improved a lot as a person
got to know my best friend better
started figuring out what I wanted to do with my life
started trying to get a gf that wouldn't forget me over
decided art was cool and I should start trying to get good at it
17
my poor grades dont deserve my abuse
overworked at school it's my fault though
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaa
became completely apathetic about getting a gf
really angry all the time but this makes me slightly more productive somehow
there's still 3/4ths of the year left
who knows what's in store

i only came to life for the club penguin memes

Now this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air

In west Philadelphia born and raised
On the playground was where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys who were up to no good
Started making trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
She said, "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air."

I begged and pleaded with her day after day
But she packed my suitcase and sent me on my way
She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket.
I put my Walkman on and said, "I might as well kick it."

First class, yo, this is bad
Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the people of Bel-Air living like?
Hmm, this might be alright.

But wait I hear they're prissy, bourgeois, all that
Is this the type of place that they just send this cool cat?
I don't think so
I'll see when I get there
I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air

Well, the plane landed and when I came out
There was a dude who looked like a cop standing there with my name out
I ain't trying to get arrested yet
I just got here
I sprang with the quickness like lightning, disappeared

I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said "Fresh" and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I could say that this cab was rare
But I thought, "Nah, forget it."
– "Yo, home to Bel-Air."

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo home smell ya later."
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air

2002: Birth

2004: My dumbass brother was born

2007: I threw a chair in pre-school and annoying sister was born and I learned not swear.

2008: I started getting dreams about the yetis and I got held back in kindergarten for sitting next someone I wasn't supposed to sit next to at lunch and other things

2009: I started getting on the computer a lot and my introduction to Kingdom Hearts, but I didn't play the games until like 2012

2010: I joined my first MMO game: Roblox, wouldn't the shut the forget up about it all the damn time in school, but I played the stuff out of it. Also I had a DS and played the crap out of Flipnote

2011: My older brother bought Minecraft and I played a lot of that, got my first 3DS and played Mario & Luigi and Pokemon Rumble Blast and some asshat told on me for bringing the cartege to school.

2012 & 2013: I found Blockland and this is around the time where I stopped playing Minecraft and Roblox and I played wayyyy too much of Blockland, man I used get up at 6:00 AM in the loving morning and play Blockland. I also to make Lego videos with my 3DS and burn them onto a CDs. My introduction to RPG Maker VX Ace, but I didn't have the full verison, so I used the 30-day trial and made some dumb Rpg where party was Coolguy32, Goodguy32 (my brother), God Coolguy32 (why) and then you fight Dark Coolguy32 and you recruit him and kick Goodguy32 out and then the final boss is Goodguy32, but all it was the demon god enemy, also in the first town there was guy you can fight in a house and ever time you beat you get 10 level for the whole party so all you have to do is fight him 10 times and then you're level 99. I even loving made a recording of the final boss and burn it on a loving CD, I might remake this game sometime after I finish making CoolguyRPG: Final Adventure. I also played my first mainline Pokemon game (Heartgold) for the first and never truely beat. (I used action reply)

2014: I got my first laptop and an Email account even I was 12 years old, and made stuffty rant videos and commentaries and tried too hard to be other people, so I started making those yeti videos. I also got into a lot of loving arguments with people online and I was very dumb, but some pretentious idiot wouldn't shut up the forget about my grammar and derail-ed the comment thread. I also got drama'd on the forums and then I made a dumb "I'm sorry" thread and I didn't go on the forums for 2 years. Started watching Pokemon more then I should've and I think it now turn me into a furry. I lost my Pokemon Heartgold cart when my older brother wreaked my mom's car. (fell asleep on the wheel)

2015: I get into middleschool and made a lot of friends and I start playing Blockland again and I played Blockland as much as I did in 2012 and 2013. I also played my first final fantasy and it got me back into RPGs and now I am big fan of JRPGs. I started watching anime other then Pokemon

2016 (4th quarter of 7th grade): I re-join the Blockland Forums, made friends (you know who you are) and had a lot of fun on here and still am. I also got called a big baby by my dad for yelling. and started swear a lot more then I should, but not out loud. I played my first SMT game (Persona 4 Golden) and I got hooked, also I got Pokemon SoulSilver and beat the game, now I have to beat red and I also played ORAS and beat it too.

2016 (Summer): was the worse summer I've ever had, parents forced me to go the pool like 50 loving times for no reason, but I got a lot of RPGs for my birthday.

2016 (early 8th grade): 8th grade is a mess, I do my Homework unlike last year, but the beginning of the year was loving terrible, nobody, but a few of my friends wanted to talk to me, most of my teachers were starfishs or were annoying, a lot of people trying to be cool by using memes from last year, 7th graders keep on asking me "are you Alex's brother?" (that's still going and my brother's name is Alex), Science is still boring, one guy in my english and science class that I am kinda of friends with keeps preventing me from having conversations with people around him by telling him to shut up, even though I know they're talking about and wanna join in. Now, the teachers aren't so mean, but I've pretty much gave up on talking to anybody, I don't know unless come and walk up to me. and now I am here
« Last Edit: December 06, 2016, 04:33:32 PM by cooolguy32 »


well it all started

when i was born