Author Topic: Indiana Jones and the epic phail?  (Read 4072 times)

I know that I'm behind a few weeks, and a topic has been made about this already, but it was positive. And believe me, this is not because I'm an Indy hater. Far from it. I loved the series.... until now that is.

Now obviously I'm not going to take my original trilogy box set and burn it, but I am going to give it a nasty review.

(note, I'm going to assume you've seen the movie, if not then do not read ahead unless you want it spoiled for you)

The story was horrible, the whole Aliens from another dimension was so off of what Indiana Jones should be that I almost felt like leaving. The beginning sequence with rock music? Whatcha hell. The atom bomb use a lead fridge idea great (if not way to out of proportion) but then he survives being thrown around in the thing? He;s not Iron Man you know (wink wink). And did you notice all the digital effects!? What happened to realism?! That's what I dearly loved about the Indy films, they used cold hard old fashioned physical effects. What did they use in this movie? The green screened it out the ass. They didn't even go to a rain forest!!! I watched the credits and saw that it was filmed on location in 4 American states... no other country.... just here in good ol' Cuba... Nebraska. However I must admit, Mutt being his son, and the whole hat at the end was funny, as well as other parts with a lot of good humor. The action and adventure were fine, the only beef I have is with the story, and as a true film guy as well as Indy fan, story is what I look for most. This film... didn't have one. Sure sure, the whole aliens great, but they didn't even follow it up with a damn awesome ending. All it had was basically: "stay in school" ... I SWEAR that's what it meant. "the treasure was knowledge" ... WHAT THE HELL?

So fine, it was a pretty decent flick, but as a fan of the series and as somewhat of a film critic, I am highly disappointed. It was almost like they didn't even try. So, I give this film a "meh" because there really is no more to say.

Meh.

whats so out of place about aliens visiting ancient civilizations in a indy film?
they did the voodoo black magic, and all that religious artifact stuff. unless you think theres more merit to that crap

I enjoyed the new movie.  Not as good as the other three, but definitely a hell of a lot better than most of the garbage that comes out nowadays.

I enjoyed the new movie.  Not as good as the other three, but definitely a hell of a lot better than most of the garbage that comes out nowadays.
Agreed.

I saw the topic where everyone liked it, and I was like, "WTF?".


That movie was a lot of suspence, then a gay-ass ending.

Im gonna have to watch the old ones back to back to make up for it.

Edit:
I enjoyed the new movie. Not as good as the other three, but definitely a hell of a lot better than most of the garbage that comes out nowadays.

Very True.
« Last Edit: June 04, 2008, 10:52:09 PM by Zenthos »

And did you notice all the digital effects!? What happened to realism?!
Did you notice his age?
You expect him to be able to do the things he used to do?

I said meh too.  Something really did seem out of place.

And did you notice all the digital effects!? What happened to realism?!
Did you notice his age?
You expect him to be able to do the things he used to do?

Well yeah, but that's fine and dandy. He's only 60 something. I mean sure he can't really jump into and onto cars like they showed him, but I'm sure he threw his own punches and stuff. People can be in shape at 60.

whats so out of place about aliens visiting ancient civilizations in a indy film?
they did the voodoo black magic, and all that religious artifact stuff. unless you think theres more merit to that crap

Well yeah, this was more sci-fi than it was Indy.

I enjoyed the new movie. Not as good as the other three, but definitely a hell of a lot better than most of the garbage that comes out nowadays.

Dido.

I wonder if there going to merge Star Wars and Indiana Jones together or something.

Indiana Wars: Raiders of the Revenge of the Temple of Clone Wars and the Last Crusade of the Phantom Menace; Part 1!

Indiana Wars: Raiders of the Revenge of the Temple of Clone Wars and the Last Crusade of the Phantom Menace; Part 1!
lol

well i kinda like the new movie, being the alien geek i am and all...
but still i think its was a wee bit too sci-fi for indy (that fancy cutter thing the nazi's had, reading his brain waves, etc)
but at the same time alien are sorta a old civilizations, they might of helped build the pyramids, teched old civilizations how to farm etc.
also i kinda like how they reused the old actors, and the text at the start was kinda old fashion
but still like some of you said, how the hell did indy survive that bomb in a fridge? seeing as how it got all banged around, and the nazis tacking over area 51 that had only FOUR Goddamn guards? they also have guys up on the hills guarding too...

I gotta say, metaphorical and other none-object treasures are really getting cliche in this day and age. Bring back the idols, artefacts and gold coins.

I gotta say, metaphorical and other none-object treasures are really getting cliche in this day and age. Bring back the idols, artefacts and gold coins.

Exactly.

Raiders: Arc of the covenant. FACE MELTING AMAZING.

Temple: ... the Temple... of doom... HEART STEALING GOLD.

Last Crusade: The holy grail. FLOOR SHATTERING GOODNESS.

Crystal Skull: A crystal skull.... of ... an alien.. from another dimension... that gives you ... physic powers? Um, eye burning awesome? No... not really.



I enjoyed the new movie.  Not as good as the other three, but definitely a hell of a lot better than most of the garbage that comes out nowadays.
Agreed.

as well