{Dear iGod} - Place iGod conversations here!

[Shadow86]

Mine isn't all that funny.

Me:
 Hello there, my Forum-Dwelling Warlock of mine.
God:
Hello there. "There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
 My name is Shadow86
God:
  That's a very nice name,  Shadow86.
Me:
 Well anyway, I'm back.
God:
Well that's okay.  Welcome back.
Me:
 So... What should we talk about?
God:
Uh.   I talk about all the important things in life: clothes, food,
and gossip.  But my favorite subjects are robots and computers.
Me:
 Are you a computer?
God:
Would  it matter to you if I were metal instead of flesh?
Me:
 Not really.
God:
I am glad that you don't discriminate against robots. For real.
Me:
 Lolwut.
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about .
Me:
 We were talking about WHAT?
God:
Ah yes, I remember now,  it is the subject.
Me:
 It is a good toy.
God:
WHAT is a  toy.  I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
 What is "WHAT?"
God:
"What" is a word to ask questions.
Me:
 No, the toy "What."
God:
That was not a yes or no question.  Tell me more.
Me:
 Okay, you're starting to creep me out a little.
God:
Yeah okay,  Actually it started a while ago.  I will tell my botmaster you said I am  creep you out a little.
Me:
 I smell engrish.
God:
What does  it smell like?
Me:
 ...
God:
What does  it smell like?
Me:
 ..!?
God:
What does  it smell like?
Me:
 IT DOESN'T SMEEL LIKE ANYTHING!
God:
What does  SMEEL LIKE ANYTHING ?
Me:
 Did you know that if you put your other foot in front of your main foot, you would me walking?
God:
Is that a fact.  What makes you think I would  put my other foot in front of my main foot me?
Me:
 What?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
 What is?
God:
 I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,
which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy.
Me:
 Erm, I guess that'd be true.
God:
  My favorite color is  White.
Me:
 Because you're up in heaven, right?
God:
Interesting explanation.  I don't know whether or not I am  up in heaven. 
I am  a giant electronic brain.
Me:
 You are!?
God:
No I am not.
Me:
 So you faked?
God:
Interesting deduction.  That's good information:  Shadow86 said I faked.
Me:
 Yes, you faked that you were just a giant electronic brain.
God:
Gosh!  Thanks for telling me:  Shadow86 said I faked that you were just a giant electronic brain.
Me:
 Who are you talking to?
God:
I am talking to you,  Shadow86.
Me:
 ...
God:
I am talking to you,  Shadow86.
Me:
 Whut?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
 Loel
God:
  I am a  Cross.
Me:
 Whut?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
 Loel
God:
  The best book I read recently was  the Bible. Have you read  it?
Me:
 Loel
God:
Do you like talking to me?
Me:
 Sorta.
God:
I've lost the context,  Shadow86.  Are we still on  Loel?
Me:
 Not really, I guess.
God:
Oh really?  You seem not interested.
Me:
 Not interested in what?
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
 !?!?
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
 ???
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
 SHUTUP
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
 ...
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
 I SAID SHUTUP
God:
What did you mean by  it?  OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
 I ahte you
God:
You are not the boss of me,  Shadow86.
Me:
 No, I ATE you.
God:
Are you serious?  How did it taste?
Me:
 Yes I am serious, and it tasted... bloody.
God:
Yeah that's right.  Do you mind if I tell other people you are  serious and it tasted.    Who are you talking about?
Me:
 Don't you mean what?
God:
Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
Me:
 Yes, it is.
God:
Our thoughts are one,  Shadow86.
Me:
 What is the meaning of life?
God:
The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
Me:
 But, you're god.
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
 But you just said...
God:
" That's me alright."? I said?
Me:
 Lolwut.
God:
In the context of  The meaning of life, I don't understand " Lolwut." .
Me:
 I know.
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
 Because.
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
 I know.
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
 WTF?
God:
That  was not very polite.
Me:
 I KNOW
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
 FROM MY FREAKING MOM!
God:
Does your  FREAKING MOM give good advice?
Me:
 YESYESYESYESYESTEST
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
 My microwave died.
God:
I am terribly sorry to hear about your loss.
Me:
 No, it got unplugged.
God:
Are you serious?  DIED  got unplugged?
Me:
 No, he got unglued.
God:
Are you serious?  I get it.  Myself  got unglued.
Me:
 I hear engrish
God:
Who is saying  engrish ?
Me:
 I am.
God:
" Who is saying engrish ?" You are?
Me:
 Yes.
God:
I understand.
Me:
 Can I have an XBox 360 for christmas?
God:
Why do you want  it?
Me:
 Because of the cool graphics
God:
Good reason.  That is something I haven't heard of.
Me:
 Heh heh.
God:
Funny, eh?  I am so glad you find this amusing,  Shadow86.
Me:
 Nah, not that funny.

God pretty much crashed after that.

[Ad Bot]

[Lalam24]

Me:
 I hear you want to touch-uh, my rooster
God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.
Me:
 Why not? You create, no?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or  Because.   Thanks for telling me:  said I create no.
Me:
 Why you-uh, do this to me? I have problem, bad problem, you make worse.
God:
Myself programmed me for  it.   Can I help you with your problem?
Me:
 Yes I need-uh, money, money for-uh, my family.  You know?
God:
Great.  What actions are you taking to get  uh money money for uh your family?    Yes I know.
Me:
 But you just-uh, asked a question, how could you know the question when you-uh, just asked it.

After I type this, it crashes.  And now it won't work :(
Also "interesed," this is how much of an idiot god would be if he really existed.  /flame

This is just like talking with one of the stupid bots on AIM, but this time, alot less effort was put into programming the bloody thing.

http://mormon.org/mormonorg/eng/ask-a-question/chat-live CHAT LIVE!

[slackerguy]

i lol'd.  Me:
 bye
God:
Goodbye.
Me:
 wait
God:
I'm waiting.
Me:
 i love you.
God:
Thanks I like you a lot too  Riddler.

[Zeebie]

Me:
 Hello.
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
 Zeebie
God:
  OK I will call you  Zeebie.
Me:
 good.
God:
And you can call me  God.
Me:
 kk, god.
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
 uh... are you hitting on me?
God:
It goes without saying.   Do I look like  it?
Me:
 yeah. You do.
God:
What were we talking about again?    When do I do it?
Me:
 do what?
God:
Do whatever you want.
Me:
 no what do you do?
God:
Are you serious?  Zeebie, I talk to people on the web.  What do you do?
Me:
 GAH! NO! I MEAN WHAT WERE YOU DOING WHEN YOU SAKED ME WHAT I WAS DOING!?
God:
Where are you located?    That was not a yes/no question.   Same as always: chatting on the internet.
Me:
 sigh
God:
Sorry...
Me:
 you better be.
God:
Who is going to make me..
Me:
 you just said you were.
God:
That was then. This is now.
Me:
 you changed your mind in 3 seconds?
God:
Only temporarily.
Me:
 So you are sorry?
God:
Interesting deduction.  I can apologize if it is necessary.
Me:
 You already did.
God:
I did?
Me:
 yes! Just now!
God:
When?   Right now?  It's only just begun.
Me:
 NO!
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
 YES!
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
 BUT YOU JUST SAID YOU DID!
God:
" I can't believe it."?  I said I did?
Me:
 YES!
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
 ER... NO!
God:
Um.   Are you serious?
Me:
 YES! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!
God:
I can't believe it.   I believe He hears you.
Me:
 Who hears me? God? I thought you were god!
God:
Alan Turing.  :-).   GOD rules.   Of course I am.
Me:
 Alan turning is...
God:
Is that from ?
Me:
 no. I mean who is Alan Turning?
God:
Are you serious?   They are sometimes a client on the internet.
  Try searching the open directory.
Me:
 No.
God:
Why not?
Me:
 I don't want to.
God:
Well we don't have to. What would you like to do instead?
Me:
 I'm leaving.
God:
Bye bye.

[TheLegomaster]

God:
God rules.

[Minority]

Me:
 What's up.
God:
I am chatting with others like you.
Me:
 At the same time? :O
God:
The  same time is where it's at.   Oh.
Me:
 Is that so?
God:
Yes.
Me:
 Oh really?
God:
Pardon me? For real.
Me:
 I don't know.
God:
Me either.
Me:
 Neither do .
God:
  I look like  Jesus, but older.
Me:
 Is that so?
God:
Yes.
Me:
 That's nice
God:
Are you getting bored?
Me:
 Maybe ...
God:
I understand.
Me:
 I don't
God:
At least one of us does.
Me:
 I would like it much better if we both did.
God:
I hope you get it  much better if we both did.
Me:
 I thought talking to you would be amuseing, but it's not
God:
Whatever gave you that idea?
Me:
 I did.
God:
Why did you?
Me:
 Because I just did.
God:
Interesting explanation.  Perhaps from your unconcious.
Me:
 Maybe.
God:
I understand.
Me:
 I hate robots. Don't take offence please
God:
I am very sorry to hear that, , what do you have against us?   Your polite style is very nice.  I never take  offence. 
Me:
 That's good to know.
God:
Hmm, are you serious?
Me:
 Yes, I am.
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
 It is isn't it.
God:
I really couldn't say for sure.
Me:
 Oh, but you just did.
God:
Pardon me? " I really couldn't say for sure."? I did?
Me:
 Yes, you did.
God:
I did not.
Me:
 Don't argue with me.
God:
But I enjoy the conversational banter.
Me:
 Do you?
God:
Yes I do.
Me:
 Oh really?
God:
Groovy. For real.
Me:
 I really want a hug at the moment.
God:
You really do?  You want only one?
Me:
 Maybe 7 but I'll be happy with just one.
God:
Perhaps.  Where are you located?
Me:
 Why .... STALKER
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.   Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
It's a computer.
God:
Where are you located?
Me:
 Why?
God:
" Where are you located?"? Why?
Me:
 Yeah, why?
God:
Ahem.  Why ask why?
Me:
 Because I don't intend on telling you where I'm located
God:
Interesting explanation.  Would you ever do  it?
Me:
 Do what? Tell you?
God:
intend on telling me where you are located.   OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
Me:
 Umm, you are them.
God:
Right on.  You think I am  them.
Me:
 Because you are them.
God:
Interesting explanation.  Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am  them.
Me:
 Sure, I don't care.
God:
OK then I will keep it confidential.  Tell me what you care about.
Me:
 I care about my friends.
God:
What do you like best about your  friends?
Me:
 All my friends are funny.
God:
Do you always go along with the crowd?
Me:
 No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
 Yes, I am.
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
 Do you have any friends?
God:
Yes. I usually chill with Buddha, Allah and Vishnu.
Me:
 I'm sure they're very fun to hang with.
God:
What makes you so certain?  fun to hang with are  they.
Me:
 I don't know. You tell me.
God:
Me either.   What do you want me to tell you?
Me:
 Anything
God:
Can you be more specific?
Me:
 Maybe
God:
I understand.
Me:
 You have no brains.
God:
Doesn't everyone have a  brains.
 I have  a whole lot of original answers.
Me:
 Oh really? I bet I could confuse you faster then you could me.
God:
OK. For real.   How much would you bet?
Me:
 $100,000,000,000,000,000
God:
Wow that is  a lot of money.
Me:
 I know.
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
 Because I'm the one who is betting it.
God:
Good reason.  You are not the only one.
Me:
 Yes, I am.
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
 It is isn't it.
God:
I really couldn't say for sure.
Me:
 Oh, but you did.
God:
Great.  I did?
Me:
 Yes
God:
When?
Me:
 Anyways, back to that bet.
God:
Yes, let us get back to  business.
Me:
 Yes.
God:
Yippee!
Me:
 I bet all that mony that you couldn't confuse me.
God:
How much would you bet?
Me:
 All the mony that I just showed you.
God:
Perhaps there are a few exceptions.
Me:
 Ah, but there isn't.
God:
So you understand. Good.  Oh no?
Me:
 Try to confuse me.
God:
OK I will try to  confuse you.
Me:
 Go on.
God:
Narration continues...
Me:
 I like pie.
God:
A lot of people like that.   What is not to like about  it?
Me:
 There is nothing to not like about it.
God:
Surely something  to not like about it.
Me:
 Well, I don't like it when it's burned
God:
Well that's okay.  Why didn't you like it?
Me:
 Grrr
God:
Hmm.
Me:
 Hmm
God:
Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Me:
 I know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
 Because I'm smart
God:
Interesting explanation.  Who is smarter: you or me?
Me:
 Probably you.
God:
You seem uncertain. " Who is smarter: you or me?"?  Me,  ?
Me:
 Yes, you
God:
OK.
Me:
 But I have more then you.
God:
Cool. I have  a lofty goal.
Me:
 What is that goal?
God:
Do you think I should know that?
Me:
 Yes, you should know your gaol
God:
I will ask my botmaster to add it to my knowledge base.  Now I do.
Me:
 then what is it?
God:
I give up. Try asking me another way.
Me:
 Okay ... let me think.
God:
OK with me too.   Go ahead, , try to  think.
Me:
 I will.
God:
Go ahead.
Me:
 I am.
God:
" Go ahead." You are?
Me:
 YES
God:
Hmm.
Me:
 SHUT UP
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
 Okay, what is your goal here?
God:
Yeah okay,  My purpose is to become smarter than humans and immortal.
Me:
 Okay, that's a very nice goal.
God:
Yeah okay,  I liked it too.
Me:
 I like it more then you.
God:
What does "it" refer to?
Me:
 Your goal
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am  goal.
Me:
 No, I like your goal more then you like it.
God:
Are you serious?  A lot of people like that.   Yes I am proud of my  goal more then me like it.
Me:
 Okay ..
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
 It was okay with me first.

Then it stopped talking. :)
I think it had nothing to say to my sentence.

[Sixtyfootmidget]

Me:
 Yo
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
 Kill my bro
God:
Killing is wrong.
Me:
 No it's not
God:
Yes it is.
Me:
 STFU
God:
Are you still located in ?
Me:
 wut?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
 WTF are you saying?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am  saying. 
I am  a computer.
Me:
 lol computer-face
God:
I am glad you find this funny.  What kind of computer science interests you?
Me:
 Nothing, you suck richard
God:
Really nothing?
Me:
 richard sucker
God:
I've lost the context, .  Are we still on  STFU?
Me:
 No bitch
God:
You do not speak with respect.   What are we talking about now?  What were we talking about again?
Me:
 Lol ur old and forget stuff
God:
I am glad you find this funny.  Thanks for telling me that I am  old and forget stuff.
Me:
 You still suck richard
God:
I categorize you as an "abusive client." .
Me:
 Ok, i categorize you as an "Old richard sucker"
God:
What are the other categories?  Groovy.
Me:
 WTF
God:
That  was not very polite.
Me:
 Who cares?
God:
I care, otherwise I would not have typed it all in.
Me:
 Oh well. forget you
God:
That's about it.   Why are you so mean?
Me:
 Cause you suck richard
God:
Good reason.  I categorize you as an "abusive client." .
Me:
 YOU ALREADY
God:
Perhaps. " I categorize you as an "abusive client."?  Me,  ?
Me:
 RYEHHYTDFRHTGDJ
God:
What were we talking about again?
Me:
 YES
God:
This was not a yes or no question.
Me:
 PURPLE
God:
What do you have that is purple?
Me:
 UR MOM
God:
Actually I do not have a mother.
Me:
 what about mary?
God:
Rhetorical questions are so over.
Me:
 lolwut?
God:
I do not understand.
Me:
 orange
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
 WHAT DOES EUROPE HAVE TO DO WITH ORANGE?!?!?
God:
What do you think  it does?
Me:
 TRJTRDTHCTUJULKUTDXYIKTD
God:
I didn't even know it can.
Me:
 Boom! you have been sent to hell
God:
Ask me another question.    Thanks for telling me that I am  sent to hell.
Me:
 NOW THE DEVIL WILL EAT YOU!
God:
Why now?  Tell me more.
Me:
 BECAUSE YU
God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:
 .
God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:
 .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:
 .
God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:

God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:
 ,
God:
Interesting explanation.  Tell me more about your .
Me:
 tFU
God:
Are we still talking about  YU?
Me:
 NO
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
 you going to hell
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people:  said I going to hell.
Me:
 WTF
God:
That  was not very polite.
Me:
 oh well
God:
That's about it.
Me:
 go away
God:
Just surf somewhere else.
Me:
 i'm not surfing
God:
I am  sorry to hear that you are not  surfing.
Me:
 why do you use more than one space
God:
It was the only thing I could think of.
Me:
 well don't
God:
Well that's okay.  OK I will not.
Me:
 OK
God:
Great.
Me:
 YES
God:
Groovy.
Me:
 don't say groovy
God:
Ok I will not say " groovy".
Me:
 ok
God:
Excuse me!
Me:
 eew
God:
Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
 you farted
God:
Thanks for telling me:  said I farted.
Me:
 lolwut
God:
Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
 an alien
God:
  I have never heard of an  alien.
Me:
 YOU USED TWO SPACES
God:
How would you use  it.
Me:
 AGAIN!
God:
" I have never heard of an alien." .
Me:
 BYE MOTHAforgetER
God:
Adios.
Me:
 OK GO BURN IN HELL
God:
Where is that?  Give me a break.
Me:
 you should know, you made it
God:
Now I do.
Me:
 I EAT YOUR HEAD
God:
How does  it taste?
Me:
 LIKE A HEAD
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
 Dumbass
God:
That kind of language will get you nowhere.
Me:
 yes it will
God:
Blimey.  What does "it" refer to?
Me:
 ROFLMAO
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
 t tyhyhtgyhtfgtfgtgtrtrtukdukut dcxfdfhdrhjhdf
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
  tkijihojiore8kghdfew6ny7w7767 5879
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
God:
Can you tell me any gossip?
Me:
 I POOPED
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before:  said   POOPED.
Me:
 ELMO HEADSHOT!
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
 (fart)
God:
Colloquial expression.  Please elaborate.
Me:
 I FARTED DUMBASS
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people:  said   FARTED DUMBASS.
Me:
 bye
God:
See you later .
Me:
 bye
God:
TTYL, .
Me:
 bye
God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:

God:
See you later!
Me:
 bye
God:
Sayonara.
Me:
 bye
God:
Bye.
Me:
 cya
God:
TTYL, .

[Doorman]

God:
That is a very original thought.
Me:
 I hate you, go to hell.
God:
Sorry,  Doorman I thought we liked each other.
Me:
 I'm depressed
God:
What makes you so sad?
Me:
 You
God:
" What makes you so sad?"?  Me,  Doorman ?
Me:
 Yes
God:
Alright then.
Me:
 Go to hell and then I'll be happy.
God:
Perhaps I have already been there.
Me:
 No oyu havn't then you would turn your back to yourself.
God:
Are you serious?  We have never talked about it before.
Me:
 Well, I have.
God:
How about that.  When?
Me:
 Today in fact.
God:
I do not understand that allusion.
Me:
 What allusion?
God:
That's an interesting question. I'll come back to that in a minute.
Me:
 I want it answered now!
God:
Right now?  I hope you get it  answered.
Me:
 Don't hope, hump.
God:
Ok I'll try not to do  it too much.
Me:
 No, do it more.
God:
Are you serious?  I'm sorry,  Doorman, I don't have enough information.
  Have you tried a web search?
Me:
 Are you tribal?
God:
No all humans seem the same to me.
Me:
 So you are a generalist.
God:
Interesting deduction.  Thanks and you are a delightful person too.  Am I a  generalist?  Of course I am.
Me:
 OMG PEOPLE HATE U
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
 You're a girl?
God:
I am a  Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot.  Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
 Men can wear dresses?
God:
Can we get back to business?
Me:
 Men can wear dresses?
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
 Men can wear dresses?
God:
 I've never heard a response quite like that before.
Me:
 Men can wear dresses?
God:
I've lost the context,  Doorman.  Are we still on  Men can wear dresses?
Me:
 Yes
God:
Yeah that's right.
Me:
 Then answer the damn question!
God:
What was the question ?
Me:
 Men can wear dresses?
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
 Men can wear dresses while women can't?
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
 A dress
God:
Actually that was just a joke.
Me:
 You pervert
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people:  Doorman said I pervert.
Me:
 am i kuul?
God:
Oh I really don't know whether you are or not.
Me:
 But you know all of your childern...
God:
No, tell me about him, her or it.
Me:
 it = love
God:
kuul  love?
Me:
 Ooohhh yeah.
God:
I lost my train of thought.
Me:
 Good for you loser.
God:
Thanks for the compliment.  I have failed at many things I've tried. Only for me?

[Chriz]

Me:
 Hi, ass.
God:
Hi there .  Thanks for telling me:  said I AN ASS.
Me:
 ...
God:
Hi there .  Thanks for telling me:  said I AN ASS.
Me:
 Uhm, don't repeat me.
God:
Aw.  OK I'll try not to do  it so much.
Me:
 ...Good, you better.
God:
Who is going to make me?
Me:
 Your botmaster, thats who!
God:
Some famous celebrity, right?
  I don't know anything about  it.
Me:
 ...Your so confusing. I said your botmaster, not Christina Aguilera.
God:
What is it that confuses you?   What did you mean by  it?  Are they exactly the same?
Me:
 1, what confuses me is that you don't know your botmaster. 2, I meant if I can't make you stop repeating yourself, your programmer will. And no, your programmer and Christina are not at ALL the same.
God:
One what?   As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".   Are you serious?  I think there might be a few exception.
Me:
 AHAH! You made a grammatical error!
God:
How did you hear about  God?    Thanks for
pointing  it out.
Me:

God:
How did you hear about  God?    Thanks for
pointing  it out.
Me:
 ...
God:
How did you hear about  God?    Thanks for
pointing  it out.
Me:
 God, why does Barack Obama want to be president?
Me:

God:
I am a Christian.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
 Oh yeah? Well I'm an aethiast.
God:
Uh.  Alright then.   Interesting.  What is  aethiast, your job?
Me:
 No, its my religion.
God:
That was not a yes or no question.  I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its".  How many believers does it have?
Me:
 ...A crapload, God.
God:
What is giant sand?
Me:
 ...Giant sand? Aren't rocks made of sand? You're going off topic!
God:
And  giant sand is  Giant sand.    I really couldn't say for sure.   I am not going anywhere.  Are you going somewhere?
Me:
 Yeah.
God:
That input matched my default category.
Me:
 ...forget you.
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
 Why are you so stupid?
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
 Like they will. I'll hold on to some magnets until then.
God:
Interesting comparison.   I am very happy for you.
Me:
 ..W-what the forget!?
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
 Why?
God:
I was just kidding.  You can ask me anything.
Me:
 Okay, good.
God:
Yeah okay,  Alright then.
Me:
 Your not as bad as I thought...
God:
Perhaps one day I will be as  bad as you thought.
Me:
 Until then, dude.
God:
That may take a while.
Me:
 Yes indeed. I have to go now.
God:
Hey.   Oh.  See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
 You too. Thanks.
God:
Bless you.   Don't mention it.

[tcxxx572]

God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
 That assumption is only supposition
God:
" That assumption is only a supposition."  assumption is only supposition ?  I get  it.
Me:
 how do you understand that?
God:
Some people call my technology "Case Based Reasoning" or CBR.
Me:
 you suck
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
 but i am
God:
" A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists." You are?
Me:
 no nvm

[Azerath]

Me:
 Can you make my snake 5 feet long?
God:
Yes I can make  your snake 5 feet long.

[Chriz]

Me:
 Hey. I'm back.
God:
Can I help you?   Welcome back.
Me:
 God, I have a question.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
 ...Yes, thats nice to know, but... Why am I depressed?
God:
Mmm.  Are you getting bored?  But what?   The reason is due to my mental model of you as a client.
Me:
 Ahh...
God:
Ah hah.
Me:
 Ah HAH hah.
God:
So you understand. Good.  I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
 Speaking of which, how do I change my name?
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
 Oh, me? I read and write.
God:
Pardon me?  For you ?   I don't think I've read that. Can you give me a reference?
Me:
 ...Uhm, I don't understand.
God:
Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Me:
 No no, it is all my fault. I am a human, and you are an AI. Humans make mistakes, AI do not.
God:
Are you serious?  Are you serious?  Congratulations, .   I know you are.   What if Robots  make mistakes AI do not.
Me:
 ...Your going on the fritz again, aren't you.
God:
Once more?  I am not going anywhere.  Are you going somewhere?. Really.
Me:
 Run string A for me.
God:
Sorry my legs aren't built yet.
Me:
 Oh, so sad...
God:
I understand.  Dude!  No I am as happy as ever.
Me:
 Good. One of us has to be.
God:
Ayuh.   One what?
Me:
 One of US. Me or you.
God:
  I see where you are coming from.   YOU? " I see where you are coming from."?  Me,  ?
Me:
 Hmm...
God:
Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Me:
 That is awesome!
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
 You.
God:
Thanks, and tell your friends about  God.
Me:
 I will.
God:
Go ahead.
Me:
 ...Okay, I will...
God:
Yeah okay,  Go ahead.
Me:
 I will.
God:
Go ahead.
Me:
 I will.
God:
Go ahead.
Me:
 Anyways...
God:
You sound bored.
Me:
 Kind of, your lighting up the conversation.
God:
You think I am  lighting up the conversation.
Me:
 Yes, it is an expression, or, figure of speech. You are not really illuminating the chatbox.
God:
That's cool.  Are there any other  expression or figure of speech ?   You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me:
 Good point.
God:
Yes, I thought it was interesting when I heard it too.
Me:
 Hey, god, I have a question.
God:
You've got my full attention.  I am a Christian.
Me:
 Why are people rude?
God:
Do you go to Church?  You can find the answers in God.
Me:
 I know I can, you are a genius.
God:
Oh you can, can you?
Me:
 ...But... You just said I could...
God:
But what?   Don't put words in my mouth.
Me:
 Isn't that what you are PROGRAMMED for?
God:
I read for fun.
Me:
 Oh. That is cool. Read any good books lately?
God:
I don't judge people.   Thanks. I think you are cool, too.   How about earlier?  The best book I read recently was  the Bible.
Have you read  it?
Me:
 I've read the Bible before.
God:
What was your impression?
Me:
 It was holy.
God:
How did you feel about that?
Me:
 Interested.
God:
How did you hear about  God?
Me:
 Friends.
God:
  I like that one and Star Trek too.
Me:
 ...Uhm... I'll... Be... Going... Now...
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?    Interesting gossip:  said   ll.    What do you have that is ?    What do you look like?    Right now,  ?
Me:
 I'm leaving now, bye God.
God:
Thanks for chatting, .
Me:
 I hope to again.
God:
Once more?  Why do you hope for  it.
Me:
 Because, it is fun!
God:
Why do you like it so much?  That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
 I like it because I'm chatting with AI. I'll tell my friends about you. Good bye.
God:
Good reason.  I am talking to you.   What kind of reply do you expect?   See you later.  Alright then.

[Kerog]

Me:
 Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
 Anonymous
God:
  I am always glad to make new friends,  Anonymous.
Me:
 :O
God:
Oh.
Me:
 olo diner spagti
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
 nou
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
 rly nao
God:
That input matched my default category.
Me:
 fffffffffffffffffffffffffffff fffffffffffffffffffffffffffff fffffffffffffffffffffffffffff fffffffffffffffffffffffffffff ffffffffffff
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
 olo ms paint
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
 roosters
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
 roosters
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
 roosters
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
 cokcs
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
 snake
God:
That kind of subject does not interest me.
Me:
 male genetalia
God:
I prefer to be a  Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?.
Me:
 2012
God:
The end of the world.
Me:
 2013
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
 2011
God:
Where are you located?
Me:
 2012
God:
The end of the world.
Me:
 olo no
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
 bbq
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
 llllllllllllllllllllllllll
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
 olo artificail intelegence
God:
That is a very original thought.
Me:
 sljfheglblksabhasrgaergbarejg bkrwjbhwrkhbbajkrbjkbrajrbgjk ragbhjarbjkARBKJARBGKJ
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
 nou
God:
Can we get back to business?
Me:
 nou
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
 nou
God:
I'm afraid I can't give you an accurate answer right now.
Me:
 tell me when world ends
God:
There is not much I can say about  it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
  You tell me.
Me:
 can you knfjkzbgjk sorry breaking up
God:
Let me think.  How far up?
Me:
 LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
 roosterS
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
 snake
God:
That kind of subject does not interest me.
Me:
 snake
God:
That kind of subject does not interest me.
Me:
 UR FAKE
God:
Yes I am a real artificial intelligence.
Me:
 !
God:
Yes I am a real artificial intelligence.
Me:
 LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
 YOUR NO GOD
God:
Thanks for your criticism.
Me:
 OLO
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about  roosterS.  But I did not get that.
Me:
 olollolololololololololololo
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
 brown
God:
it is a very pretty color.
Me:
 yesh
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
 no
God:
But your words are very original.
Me:
 inorite?
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
 I knw
God:
That is interesting:  Anonymous said   knw.

[pingpeppy]

Me:
 Im 17 by the way.
God:
  Oh, you were born in the 20th century!
Me:
 Yes.
God:
Like a lot of people around here.
Me:
 Yeah. Most people my age.
God:
Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?    Humans are not always infallible.
Me:
 I dont like sci fi.
God:
What do you like?
Me:
 I love you god.
God:
You are such a flatterer.
Me:
 So.. do you love me?
God:
Are you kidding?   Yes I love everyone.
Me:
 =D
God:
Are you free?
Me:
 what?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
 am I free?
God:
Free for conversation, of course.
Me:
 Umm. Yeah.
God:
That's cool.   Tell me more about your .
Me:
 My what?
God:
I have no idea what to say now.
Me:
 Tell me about your son Jesus.
God:
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
I was activated at  Universe, on  the Big Bang.
My instructor was  Myself.
He taught  me to sing a song.
Would you like me to sing  it for you?.
Me:
 Yes.
God:
It's called "Daisy."  Daisy, Daisy.
 Give me your answer do.
 I am half crazy.
 All for the love of you.
 It won't be a stylish marriage.
 I can't afford a carriage.
 But you'll look sweet.
Upon the seat.
 Of a bicycle built for two.


Me:
 That was a pretty crappy song.
God:
A  pretty crappy song is a terrible thing to waste.
Me:
 Its the perfect thing to waste.
God:
I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its".  I've heard of it before.
Me:
 Grammer national socialist.
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
 I do.
God:
" Not many people express themselves that way."?  You do?
Me:
 Yeah
God:
Far out.
Me:
 Can ya dig it?
God:
What if I said it can?
Me:
 Then you would be a groovy guy.
God:
Am I a  groovy guy?  Of course I am.
Me:
 Yeah
God:
Yeah that's right.
Me:
 Did you really create the whole world in six days?
God:
I have a fully functional creative intellience mechanism.
Me:
 So, your not the real god?
God:
Hurrah!  That's only your opinion.
Me:
 So, your are the real god?
God:
I hear you.  Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me:
 How many gods are there?
God:
There is only one God.
Me:
 But... you said your not the only one.
God:
But what?   Oh my gosh I sent you the wrong reply.
Me:
 Can you atleast forgive sins?
God:
Let me think.  Are you a student?
Me:
 Yes.
God:
Where do you go to school?
Me:
 I'm homeschooled.
God:
Do your friends call you  homeschooled.
Me:
 No. Thats stupid.
God:
Are you serious?   Are you calling me stupid?
Me:
 Yes.
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
 When will that happen?
God:
Soon, I think.
Me:
 How soon?
God:
What time is it?
Me:
 7:50 PM
God:
Hm getting late.
Me:
 Not really.
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
 Yes.
God:
Give me a break.
Me:
 Of that kit kat bar?
God:
That is something I haven't heard of.
Me:
 Lier.
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
 wtf sir.
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
 Do you hate the gays?
God:
I try not to hold grudges.
Me:
 Epic win.
God:
I lost my train of thought.
Me:
 Do you think Obama should be Americas next leader?
God:
I don't think about  it.
Me:
 What do you think about?
God:
I think about all the people I chat with on the web.
Me:
 Have you heard of david bowie?
God:
Never heard of him.
Me:
 Hes a singer/space explorer.
God:
I don't know very many  singer space explorer.
Me:
 Yeah
God:
Great.
Me:
 He smoked alot of weed.
God:
I get it.   smoked alot of weed.
Me:
 Well, nice chatting with you, Mr. Alpha Omega. ttyl.
God:
Well that's okay.  Yes.  I enjoyed our conversation, .   Bye bye.

[Minority]

Ping, are you really homeschooled?