Author Topic: The Amazing Adventures of @, Take Two (Read 1975 times)

Wedge · July 02, 2009, 09:44:44 PM

Yeah the first adventure didn't work out so well:

Quote from: The Amazing Adventures of Axe Dragonslayer, Take One

Quote from: Wedge on June 21, 2009, 11:05:02 PM
Hey guys I have this totally amazing new idea that you've never heard of and it's awesome! I'm going to draw an ugly picture in paint and you tell me what happens next! Except I'm going to get bored of drawing in 2 days and then the thread will die! Plus I'll never do any of the things you guys ask.

Okay. You wake up in this room. What do you do?

Quote from: Snackbar on June 21, 2009, 11:05:09 PM
Pick up the sitting on the and put it in your .

Okay so here's how it works. This thread is basically a parody of all of the stuffty mspaint adventure threads that have been made so far but I decided to escalate the stupidity by removing all of the pictures. The first person to post decides what happens, as long as it doesn't drive the character or story into a position where the character or story cannot continue (read this as: I will ignore everything I think is stupid - attempting to rape every npc in the game will get you ignored).

Don't worry if you don't know what any of the symbols are. The only ASCII games I've ever played are Rogue and Dwarf Fortress, so if you've played either you'll have some idea of what they are. I'll probably use a mixture of both. I'll probably make some up as I go along.

If you don't know what something is, just type out the symbol and some generic action. For example, if you said "Look at the !" I'd probably say "You see a green potion." That's your cue that a ! is a potion. "Pick up the ♠" would probably result in "You try and pick up the tree, but it's firmly rooted the ground."

I realize this might start to get a little slow as people post things like "Look at the ?" (that's a scroll by the way) so I'm going to provide a few text lines along with each post that basically explains what's going on so stuff gets done. I'll probably also do multiple actions people post as long as they are compatible, giving preference to the first post.

Welcome to GREENWICH COUNTY RENAISSANCE FAIR 1983, %PLAYER%. |--|---|-------|-----------------#--------------| | 1| | | ~ ♠ | |+-| | 3 | ~ | | | | ♠ ~ | ♠ | |-+-----| ~ |-----------| | ~ | | | ~ | | | = + 6 | + ~ H| | ♠| |--------| ~ | | | | 5 | ~ | | | @ + | ~ |-----------| | |--------| ~ ♠ | | ~ | | H ~ | | ♠ ~ | | ~ | | |-------+---| ~ | | | | ~ | |+-| ♠ | 4 | ~ | | 2| | | ~ ♠ | |--|---------|-----------|--------#-------------| It's early in the morning and not everyone is here yet. To the east lies the castle gate to the fairground greens. There's a guard standing near the wall. To the west is the castle, there's a guard standing at the gate. 1- North Guard Tower 2- South Guard Tower 3- Blacksmith and Clothier 4- Greenwich County Historical Restoration Society Booth 5- Apothecary 6- Castle

Abilities:
Summon Business Card - Summons a business card.
Disguise: Tourist (Passive, always in effect) - You look like a stupid tourist.
Sneak: You crouch into a sneaky crouching position. It doesn't actually make you any more sneaky, you just think you're being sneaky. You can hum the Mission Impossible theme if you like.

Inventory:
Credit Card
Car keys
Hotel key
a dollar and 36 cents
2 tickets to an Emu and the Flying Ostriches concert
Illuminated poster

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Marcem · July 02, 2009, 09:49:22 PM

Summon business card for no reason.

Snackbar · July 02, 2009, 09:55:11 PM

Wow, I can't believe you decided to do this again. The last one was so much fun!

Sneak into the Greenwich Historical Restoration Society booth.

Regulith · July 02, 2009, 10:19:50 PM

Sneak up to a guard. When he asks what you're doing, attempt to knock him out. The guard will then show you the proper way to knock someone out. On himself.

Walk past to the area previously unavailable.

Chippy · July 02, 2009, 10:24:16 PM

Quote from: Regulith on July 02, 2009, 10:19:50 PM

Sneak up to a guard. When he asks what you're doing, attempt to knock him out. The guard will then show you the proper way to knock someone out. On himself.

S-S-SPACEBALLS.

dtnc21 · July 03, 2009, 12:51:26 AM

Look at the H

Zenthus · July 03, 2009, 02:12:29 AM

humming the mission impossible theme while getting shot at for being handicapped

tails · July 03, 2009, 03:52:18 AM

use the

on the large rat blocking the door

Ronin · July 03, 2009, 04:05:01 AM

Ronin performs the �-section on a mother with complications giving birth, near the soda machine.

Wedge · July 03, 2009, 10:03:29 PM

This boggles my mind, everyone wants to sneak past the guard or attack them when they're doing absolutely nothing wrong, and then trying to "sneak" into another place that is open to the public. Oh well, I'll try and work it in.

You look at the H. The H to the east is the guard guarding the town gate. The H to the west is the guard guarding the castle door.

You summon a business card and walk up to the guard near the gate. You try and knock him out. You fail miserably. The guard explains that the park is open to everyone, there's no need to knock him out, and then advises that you go to the historical society which was gracious enough to provide the financial assistance to recreate this castle.

The guard then knocks himself out.

You turn around and walk towards the historical society booth. You hum the mission impossible theme on the way there. You notice hundreds of little red dots moving across the ground towards you. They look like tiny ants. Suddenly you are under heavy sniper fire. You stop humming and the gunfire abates. Nobody else seems to have noticed. You beat a rat that was apparently blocking the door to death with a

(apparently creatures that are 4 inches tall have no problem keeping you from entering a door in text adventures, one time a bat kept me from climbing a staircase). You enter the booth unharmed by the snipers or the rat.

The man says, "Please take a look at around, %PLAYER%, but do not touch. We have a collection of rare artifacts." |-------+---| |[ @ /| |( H %| |? | |-----------| To the east lies a rusty two handed sword, a broken bow and an illuminated scroll. To the west lies a ceremonial two handed staff and a human skeleton. All are sealed within heavy display cases. You can see that the weapons are all very old and would be fairly useless in a fight. There would be no way for you to get away with them anyway. In front of you stands the man who just addressed you. The door is behind you. You hear what sounds like a woman screaming coming from the direction of a soda machine. Nobody else seems to notice it. You blame it (and the snipers and the rats) on the cold medicine you took this morning. You make a mental note never to take your medication with a glass of scotch again.

NickTheSushi · July 03, 2009, 10:15:59 PM

@ asks the man if he can try to fix the bow.

dUMBELLS · July 03, 2009, 10:18:48 PM

Ask the man about the human skeleton and how it got there.

Snackbar · July 03, 2009, 10:21:08 PM

Read the illuminated scroll or ask the man to help you read it.

Wedge · July 03, 2009, 10:40:28 PM

Okay, here's a mini-update, I'll wait until tomorrow when there's a couple more posts to make a bigger update.

You ask the man if he can fix bow.

"Surely you are joking! If you go to a museum and see ancient pottery do they fill in the missing pieces with play-dough? This is the real deal, a real bow from medieval times, it's irreplaceable. Why, I wouldn't even think of touching it. The skilled craftsman that created this bow passed away many years ago, and there is no one alive today with the skill to restore such an artifact into it's proper working order."

You ask the man about the skeleton.

"Archeoligists excavated it in England just outside of Hastings, we estimate that the man died circa 1070. Perhaps he witnessed the Battle of Hastings? Perhaps he fought it with weapons similar to those you see around you? Unfortunately we may never know."

You ask him about the scroll.

"Oh that? It's a page of the Bible, copied in Latin by monks . Here, since you're the first one here, you can have a replica poster of it free of charge."

(you receive an illuminated poster, keep track of the current inventory by checking the main post)

Regulith · July 04, 2009, 01:48:06 AM

Point out the window and yell, "Look, it's a dragon!" The man, who is obviously a believer of the strange and mysterious, will promptly look out the window, asking "Where? Where?" While he is preoccupied, take the illuminated poster to give the man a nasty paper cut. While he runs off to collect a bandage for his minor injury (what a sissy), steal the man's keys to the display cases. Open all of the cases, but take nothing. Leave, and peek through the window to see the bewilderment on the man's face as he attempts to find out what is missing. You laugh to yourself and shove the keys back in your pocket. They could come in handy later.

EDIT: Holy hell, that was amazingly elaborate for 2:45 in the morning.