A Higgs-Boson particle walks into a catholic church. The Priest says, "Higgs-Boson particles are not allowed here, they call themselves the God particle, that is sacrilegious!"
The Higgs-Boson particle says, "But, without me, how can you have mass?"
Heisenberg and Schrodinger are driving in a car and are pulled over by a cop. The Officer asks, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
Heisenberg says, "No, but I can tell you exactly where I was."
The police officer thinks this is strange, so he looks in the trunk of the car, only to find that there is a dead cat inside. He then says, "Did you know that there is a dead can in here?"
Schrodinger says, "Well, I do now!"
