The Strangers- a book I'm writing.

[Mulch]

What assertions you guys are making about me.

[Ad Bot]

[AromaniaFTW]

that you're a big richard and don't understand things very well

[Nal]

holy pagestretch

[Acerblock]

I skimmed through it. Needs more description and some dialouge bits are confusing. It's not terrible, but not great.

[Mulch]

that you're a big richard and don't understand things very well

I disagree.

[TristanLuigi]

how about you not use code as it extends the page to the point of unreadability

How about you get a browser that doesn't freak out when code blocks are used?

[awesomebread]

Lol'd at the poll
56 no votes

[ChappersTeddy]

Reminds me of this book.

Basically, the girl gets kidnapped, her father is a rich guy, and they will only release her if she tells her dad to give the ransom.
You've got a good idea going on, this book sounds awesome and I'd buy it. However, I noticed this - how did the protagonist  manage to get in the van without even being put inside? You forgot to describe how they even got in the van.

[fawkes..]

t a good idea going on, this book sounds awesome and I'd buy it. However, I noticed this - how did the protagonist  manage to get in the van without even being put inside? You forgot to describe how they even got in the van.

I also noticed this. The van goes from accelerating to 50mph to being at a stand-still with the driver waving a knife around in one sentence.

"...sending the truck flying down the road at, at least, 50 mile per hour.
Then, my worst fear became reality: He took out a knife, and showed it to me."

Although this first attempt isn't fantastic, I suggest you read all the advice you've been given and try again.

[Skull Candy]

Nope forget off you loving friend. Don't try to be such a hardass.

Okay, now you're just a super obnoxious douche.

[Spartan 317]

I've lost a lot of inspiration, like I expected...

just improvise with writing every now and again and don't take everyone so seriously on their comments

[RaR]

Not sure what else to say other than it's pretty stale / uninteresting. Are you just writing this off the bat or do you have an actual story, plot, characters, back stories, etc?

Nope forget off you loving friend. Don't try to be such a hardass.

top kek this is the literal epitome of immaturity

[Kaphonaits²]

he gets captured at knife point so his cellphone can be swiped from him?

oh no!

[Zalot]

tons of spelling/punctuation errors

cardboard characters, the story doesn't make sense, and you accomplished literally nothing the entire time

[Mulch]

Okay, now you're just a super obnoxious douche.

You attacked my personality first "One of those people" Same thing different day, I say something against someone else, someone attacks my personality, I don't want to defend it because the argument isn't about the topic anymore. Take it to loving drama if you want to talk about how much of a massive douche I am,

top kek this is the literal epitome of immaturity

both of you.