Merasmus the Wizard

[Johnimiester]

They're all shovelware made for Android.

I want a better computer.

[Ad Bot]

[Juncoph]

You get a better computer which breaks down after a month of use.

I wish for free vidya

[Johnimiester]

They're all shovelware made for Android.

I wish to not need to sleep.

[The GI of MA]

I wish to not need to sleep.

You need to sleep all the time.

I want a shotgun

[TheEpicRobot]

You need to sleep all the time.

I want a shotgun

You get a syringe gun.

I want a duck.

[AutoBahn]

I want a duck.

You get a richard.

I wish for Merasmus.

[InvisibleName]

You get a broken Wizard.

I wish to live for eternity.

[Johnimiester]

You live forever in constant, horrific pain.

I want a better forum username.

[The_Infiltrator]

I want a better forum username.

You are given Kalphiter's username.

I want higher-caliber siblings.

[Slate521]

Your siblings are now Goalkeeper CIWS's. (30mm)



I want Old Spice.

[ThatRandomGuy]

You get some spice that was recently found in a 500 year old barrel.

I wish for a Cannon.

[Johnimiester]

You get a miniature cannon replica.

I want for there to be some sort of celebration everyday.

[BreadFish]

The celebration is about the death of you

I wish for better internet

[Juncoph]

You get an offer for better internet only valid in a nearby county.


I want money again since I'm an uncreative pleb.

[redoctober2009]

You receive exactly 100 quadrillion US dollars in cash. Aside from the sheer weight of the money crushing you and killing you where you stand, the sudden influx of cash collapses the US economy and the money becomes worthless.

I wish for the ability to teleport to any location I so choose, at any time.