HIGH ROLLERS

[Kidalex90]

shank razor

[Ad Bot]

[NotBomberguy]

leap at razor and start EATING HIS loving FACE

[Glass Joe]

In true Canadian fashion, apologize heavily to Razor. Then stare at him again.

[tber123]

CRITAWAKETS: Rolled a 4(Minor Failure) You end up summoning a tank from the Canadian Rebels... Outside the gulag. On the fifth story. The tank ends up falling five stories and exploding.
Zoltan: Rolled a 8! SUCCESS! You politely ask the Canadians to move aside for you and run like hell.
Space1255: Rolled a 7. Slight Success! You and a few other random prisoners gang up on Razor and beat him senseless for 1 DMG.
Legodude77: Rolled a 3. Minor Failure! You grab a bucket of water and spill it everywhere, but all you manage to trip up are your fellow inmates.
Cybertails1998: Rolled a 2. FAILURE! You grab a wooden table and throw it at Razor, but he catches it and throws it back into your face, smacking you for 2 DMG.
Kidalex: Rolled a 4. Slight Failure! You grab your toothbrush and sharpen it against your cell before charging at Razor from behind. Razor spins around and blocks the attack before shoving you away.
NotBomberGuy: Rolled a 6. Slight Success! You lunge at Razor and take a bite out of his face, causing 1 DMG.
Glass Joe: Rolled a 10. CRITICAL SUCCESS! You apologize to Razor and stare intensely at him again, smacking him for 2 DMG.

Razor collapses to the floor unconscious.
Gordie Montgomery attempts to revive Razor! Roll Result: 0. Gordie has forgeted up.
Razor is now Dead.
Gordie Montgomery lets out a scream of despair and runs away sobbing.

Razor has been defeated! Our brave heroes continue moving up, eventually making their way upstairs along with a few other prisoners tagging along! The Warden's Office is the next target, as only she can unlock the front doors to the Gulag!

The Warden has barricaded the doors to her office, however. As our heroes ponder how to bust the door down, the Warden begins shouting death threats from the other side.

ENEMY STATUS:
Warden's Door - 20 HP

PLAYER STATUS(6HP Max):
Copy Kirby- 5 HP, LightInjury
Cybertails - 4 HP, Wounded
LegoDude- 4 HP, Wounded
CRITAWAKETS, Canadian savior - 4 HP, Wounded
Zoltan - 6 HP, Healthy
NotBomberguy - 5 HP, Light Injury
Glass Joe - 5 HP, Light Injury
Space1255 - 6 HP, Healthy
HULKHOGAN - 6 HP, Healthy
Kidalex90 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Prisoner 156 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Prisoner 231 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Prisoner 992 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Prisoner 669 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Patrolling Guard Boris Proletariat- -1 HP, loving Dead

Scenario Statistics:
Most Successful Player: Copy Kirby (2 Gone Horribly Right) and CRITAWAKETS (1 InstaDeath Roll Survived)
Guards Converted: 1
Guards Killed: 7
Enemy Mishaps: 5
Most Damage Caused: Space1255(10 DMG)
Deadliest Player: Space1255(1 Kill), NotBomberGuy(1 Kill) and Glass Joe(1 Kill)
Most Untrustworthy: Space1255(1 TeamKill)

Code: [Select]

0: Spectacular Failure With Injury and Chance of Death
1-2: forgetup With a Chance of Injury
3-4: Minor Failure
5: Mixed Result (Pretty much nothing)
6-7: Slight Success
8-9: Success
10: Critical Success
11: Gone Horribly Right (Critical Success w/ Chance of Injury)
12: Really Pushing It (Critical Success w/ Injury and Chance of Death)
13: JESUS! (Critical Success w/ Instant Death)
Assisting adds +2 to a Roll and sacrifices your turn. Action Rolls are done for pretty much everything but reviving another dead player.

[CRITAWAKETS]

forget it,go through the hole the canadians made and eliminate opposition with a AKM.

Destroy the door with C4.

[BreadFish]

Take boris's AK
SPray down the door with immense recoil

[Legodude77]

I WILL SPILL MAMA'S SECRET SPICY SAUCE ON THE BARRICADES, CAUSING THEM TO MELT.

[The Murderous Cop]

punch the door down with saxton hale's own fists

[Space1255]

Get all of the prisoners to charge at the door to bust it down with all of their rage

[Cybertails1998]

APPLY LEG TO DOOR

[HULKHOGANWWFWORLDCHAMPION]

Boot the door using my big ass boot

[Glass Joe]

Stare right through the door, and into the Warden's stupid face.

[tber123]

CRITAWAKETS: Rolled a 11. GONE HORRIBLY RIGHT! You spam packs of C4 all over the Warden's Door before stepping backwards. The explosion's shockwave knocks you flat on your ass(-1 HP), but the fireball doesn't consume you. You've also dealt a whopping 4 DMG to the Door.

NEWCOMER Breadfish: Rolled a 5. Mixed Result! You take an AK from Boris's body before firing it one-handed at the door. Your shots end up flying everywhere due to the recoil.

Legodude77: Rolled a 8. SUCCESS! You spill the SECRET SPICY SAUCE on the Barricades, melting some of them and hitting the door for 2 DMG.

Murderous Cop: Rolled a 3. Minor Failure! You try to get Saxton Hale to attempt to punch the door down, but he's too busy beating a yeti to death to do it.

Space1255: Rolled a 0! SPECTACULAR forgetUP! Instadeath Roll: INSTAKILLED! You use your compelling voice! You rally the prisoners! You watch the prisoners let loose furious screams as they charge the door! You watch THE DOOR GROW A PAIR OF ARMS AND START FIRING AKIMBO RAYGUNS. YOU TAKE 12 RAYGUN SHOTS TO THE FACE IN RAPID SUCCESSION. YOU DIE.

....What a shame. Space1255 is now loving Dead(-1 HP) and can be revived. Only one person can revive Space1255 at a time, and they'll sacrifice their turn if they do.

Cybertails: Rolled a 6! Slight Success! You kick the door with all your might and smack it for 1 DMG.

HULKHOGANWWFWORLDCHAMPION: 11. HOLY stuff! You kick the door with that big-ass boot for 5 DMG! You also break your foot from how hard you've kicked the door and take 1 DMG.

Glass Joe: Rolled a 2! FAILURE! You stick your face into the door and stare at the Warden, only to narrowly dodge a shotgun blast. The glass shards cut you up for 1 DMG.

NPC Prisoner 156: Rolled a 0! SPECTACULAR forgetUP! You summon the Conservative Crime Squad to shoot down the door with an RPG, only for them to shoot you with it instead for a Perma-Kill.
NPC Prisoner 231: Rolled a 2! FAILURE! You grab a uniform from a dead guard and try to bluff your way into the Warden's Office, only to take a shotgun blast to the groin for 3 DMG.
NPC Prisoner 992: Rolled a 4! Minor Failure! You politely knock on the door in true Canadian fashion. The Warden rudely declines the knock by trying to shoot you with a shotgun through the windows and barricades.
NPC Prisoner 669: Rolled a 6! Minor Success! You summon a Lawyer to give the door a lawsuit, hitting it for 1 DMG!

---ENEMY TURN---
Warden's Door rolls a SUCCESSFUL 9 and whips out a mare's leg-style Lever Action Shotgun before firing it at Zoltan, hitting him for 2 DMG! Warden's Door then flip-roosters the shotgun!

ENEMY STATUS:
Warden's Door - 7 HP

PLAYER STATUS(6HP Max):
Copy Kirby- 5 HP, LightInjury
Cybertails - 4 HP, Wounded
LegoDude- 4 HP, Wounded
CRITAWAKETS, Canadian savior - 3 HP, Badly Hurt
Zoltan - 4 HP, Wounded
NotBomberguy - 5 HP, Light Injury
Glass Joe - 4 HP, Wounded
Space1255 - loving Dead(-1 HP)
HULKHOGAN - 5 HP, Light Injury
Kidalex90 - 6 HP, Healthy
Breadfish - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Prisoner 156 - GAME OVER
[NPC]Prisoner 231 - 3 HP, Badly Hurt
[NPC]Prisoner 992 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Prisoner 669 - 6 HP, Healthy
[NPC]Patrolling Guard Boris Proletariat- -1 HP, loving Dead

Scenario Statistics:
Most Successful Player (Will count this later)
Guards Converted: 1
Guards Killed: 7
Enemy Mishaps: 5
Most Damage Caused: Space1255(10 DMG)
Deadliest Player: Space1255(1 Kill), NotBomberGuy(1 Kill) and Glass Joe(1 Kill)
Most Untrustworthy: Space1255(1 TeamKill)
Most Deaths: Space1255(1 Death)

WARNING! I've modified a roll result slightly. Changes are highlighted in red.

0: Spectacular Failure With Injury and Chance of Death
1-2: forgetup With Injury
3-4: Minor Failure
5: Mixed Result (Pretty much nothing)
6-7: Slight Success
8-9: Success
10: Critical Success
11: Gone Horribly Right (Critical Success w/ Chance of Injury)
12: Really Pushing It (Critical Success w/ Injury and Chance of Death)
13: JESUS! (Critical Success w/ Instant Death)
Assisting adds +2 to a Roll and sacrifices your turn. Action Rolls are done for pretty much everything but reviving another dead player.

I think I might have screwed up on some of the statistics slightly. Going to have to re-count either now or at the end. Statistics alone significantly add to how long updates take, though.

[The Murderous Cop]

summon Y.V. to 'POP POP' the door

[Glass Joe]

Look over at Space's corpse, and use sheer willpower to bring him back to life.