Author Topic: Blockland Forums Mercenary Company [BLFMC] (Read 4809 times)

McZealot · November 23, 2016, 02:18:06 AM

Info

This is an open-ended Roll20-based adventure.
Your stats will be linked to your account and will be generated when you take your first action.
Everyone is a member of the group, and can take an action at any time.
All skill/dice mechanics are handled by the GM, and all actions are subject to GM veto.

Skills

Strength is being able to crush a tomato.
Dexterity is being able to dodge a tomato.
Constitution is being able to eat a bad tomato.
Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is knowing not to put a tomato in a fruit salad.
Charisma is being able to sell a tomato based fruit salad.

Skill Modifiers

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McZealot · November 23, 2016, 02:33:30 AM

The BLFMC relaxes aboard their sturdy vessel, the U.S.S. Ephialties, sprawled across the small dining area and happily munching down upon bags of Schips� and Schmips� respectively. Through a great hangar window, they supervise the Loris-9 Inner-Core Drilling Operation, a new and revolutionary fracking technique put in place by the Immortal God-Emperor Annoying Orange. Just a mile in the distance, the gargantuan facility is perfectly centered between the desert mountains, endlessly pumping masses of plasma in a concentrated blast right to the center of the planet. You frown as a hooded figure approaches the plasma stream, pouring in a thin vial. The unstable dark mixture blends into the plasma stream, seeming to vanish without further incident.

Sighing in relief, you turn back to your Schips� / Schmips�. Right as a particularly tasty piece enters your mouth, you nearly jump out of your skin from a deafening alarm that bellows throughout the desert! You glance out the window, and gasp as the previously thin plasma-well has collapsed into a growing chasm of black energy, perhaps ten-times it's initial size. As long cracks spread across the dry desert floor, you quickly realize that this entire place is about to collapse into the burning core of the planet! You've got a minute--maybe two, before this weather gets a whole lot hotter!

From the intercom sounds a sinister voice. "Allahu Ackbar! Space-CIA has struck again!"

tber123 · November 23, 2016, 10:13:23 AM

Holy stuff it's back

OT: Rush forward to bribe the infidels with Schimps�

cromartini · November 23, 2016, 12:48:30 PM

Run towards the nearby escape shuttle, enter it and blast off towards Space-CIA's ship.
Then crash land into the ship and start gunning down all the muslims on the ship, while singing This. This is what all those years of kebab hunting led to.

Redconer · November 23, 2016, 02:08:12 PM

Arm up.

McZealot · November 23, 2016, 03:35:08 PM

Quote from: tber123 on November 23, 2016, 10:13:23 AM

OT: Rush forward to bribe the infidels with Schimps�

STR: 13 (1) - DEX: 16 (2) - CON:16 (2) - INT: 12 (0) - WIS: 11 (0) - CHA: 14 (1)

You leap from the hangar door, and rush into the desert to meet the infidel who condemned this planet to death just moments ago. He draws a Space-Pistol as you approach, so you attempt to assuage his concerns by waving a bag of Schmips� over your head as you approach.

You roll a 17 on Charisma, +1, so 18.

The terrorist sheathes his weapon to catch a thrown bag of Schmips�, and hesitantly opens the bag. His eyes go wide as the sweet nectary scent of Schmips� reaches his nose, and he eagerly takes a bite. His expression seems to lighten briefly, before returning to sorrow. With a knowing stare, he throws his pistol across the sand to your feet, and looks up as he begins to... evaporate? He's being transported out of here--but to where?!

Quote from: cromartini on November 23, 2016, 12:48:30 PM

Run towards the nearby escape shuttle, enter it and blast off towards Space-CIA's ship.
Then crash land into the ship and start gunning down all the muslims on the ship, while singing This. This is what all those years of kebab hunting led to.

STR: 18 (3) - DEX: 5 (-2) - CON:18 (3) - INT: 12 (0) - WIS: 5 (-2) - CHA: 5 (-2)

With hulking form, you leap from the hangar and land with a thin explosion of sand going up from your feet. Looking around wildly, you try to locate some sort of CIA Flagship.

You roll a 9 on Wisdom, -2, so 7.

There it is--in the corner of your vision! A thorny monster of a ship, it blasts through the desert clouds, hanging a long black banner that reads "SPACE-CIA". Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to have any form of shuttle, and it's clearly too far to follow on foot or in any form of smaller pod. It's heading to the North-East. Perhaps the U.S.S. Ephialtes could enter pursuit?

Quote from: Redconer on November 23, 2016, 02:08:12 PM

Arm up.

STR: 17 (2) - DEX: 4 (-2) - CON:4 (-2) - INT: 15 (1) - WIS: 7 (-1) - CHA: 10 (0)

You calmly set down your bag of Schips� / Schmips� (however you identify), and walk to the Annoying Orange-Mandated "EMERGENCY WEAPONRY COMPARTMENT". Pulling on the rusty handle, the compartment slides open. It's been a long time, and a small cloud of dust erupts from the old chest, sending you into a coughing fit.

You roll a 15.

You grin as the compartment yields just one last weapon--a Annoying Orange-Brand Laser-Shotgun, and in mint condition! Despite the dust, it's shining metal rims catch the desert sun, creating a terrifyingly beautiful space-gun.

A siren blasts from the mining facility as it collapses into the void.
"ALL PERSONNEL EVACUATE! ESTIMATED FULL COLLAPSE IN: 30 SECONDS."

JamesH · November 23, 2016, 03:40:02 PM

warp out onto SPACE-CIA's ship

Redconer · November 23, 2016, 04:42:18 PM

Evacuate with any other personnel to protect them.

tber123 · November 23, 2016, 08:56:26 PM

Pray to God Emporer Annoying Orange and rush for the EscAnnoying Orange-Pods�

Planr · November 23, 2016, 10:07:19 PM

take control of the ship and travel back in time and go to earth and crash into the twin towers

McZealot · November 23, 2016, 11:14:55 PM

Quote from: JamesH on November 23, 2016, 03:40:02 PM

warp out onto SPACE-CIA's ship

STR: 5 (-2) - DEX: 18 (3) - CON:17 (2) - INT: 5 (-2) - WIS: 15 (1) - CHA: 11 (0)

You can't just stand about while SPACE-CIA spreads terror throughout the galaxy. You rush to the ship transporters, and quickly initialize a voice command. "Computer! Warp me about the SPACE-CIA Flagship!" It chirps in recognition, and begins to scan the surrounding sky.

You roll a 6 on Intelligence, +1 so 7.

"FLAGSHIP LOCATED, OFFICER. SHIELDS BLOCK TRANSPORT," says Ephialtes. You curse under your breath, and try to reroute around the barricade. Your efforts are in vain, as while you pierce their shields, the Flagship has now gone out of range. Perhaps if you could get closer...?

Quote from: Redconer on November 23, 2016, 04:42:18 PM

Evacuate with any other personnel to protect them.

STR: 17 (2) - DEX: 4 (-2) - CON:4 (-2) - INT: 15 (1) - WIS: 7 (-1) - CHA: 10 (0)

You can't just stand about while SPACE-CIA spreads terror throughout the galaxy. You rush to the hangar door, and quickly stop it from automatically closing under the environmental disaster. Glancing out at the crumbling desert, you scan the horizon for anyone that might need your help.

You roll a 3 on Wisdom, -1 so 2.

It looks as though most of the Mining Crew have evacuated by this point--or fallen to their deaths. Just as you prepare to close the hangar door, you hear a sharp cry. "Mister! Help me!" Looking out into the desert, you see a young boy, trapped on a crumbling lock in the center of the void. Sheathing your Annoying Orange-Brand Laser-Shotgun, you rush out of the hangar and prepare to save a life. You stop in your tracks as the boy falls into the void with a scream, which gradually gets louder as his flesh is burned away under the unimaginable heat of the inner planet. With little left to do, you re-board the ship, and re-close the hangar door.

Quote from: tber123 on November 23, 2016, 08:56:26 PM

Pray to God Emporer Annoying Orange and rush for the EscAnnoying Orange-Pods�

STR: 13 (1) - DEX: 16 (2) - CON:16 (2) - INT: 12 (0) - WIS: 11 (0) - CHA: 14 (1)

You hope someone is going to fly the ship out of here, but just in case nobody aboard the Ephialties has even a modicum of competence, you decide to prepare the escape-pods. Rushing to the back of the storage facility, you run along the wall, quickly tapping the large button to prepare the pod engine.

You roll a 1 on Intelligence. Critical Failure.

Relieved as the pods boot to life, you put your hands on your chest and admire your achievement. "AUTO-EVAC INITIALIZING," chirps the Ephialtes. You curse under your breath as the pods shoot into the collapsing planet, one-by-one. This ship better get off the ground--and fast!

Quote from: Planr on November 23, 2016, 10:07:19 PM

take control of the ship and travel back in time and go to earth and crash into the twin towers

STR: 13 (1) - DEX: 15 (1) - CON:5 (-2) - INT: 15 (1) - WIS: 8 (-1) - CHA: 5 (-2)

With a cruel chuckle, you reassure your crewmen. "Don't worry boys, I'll get us out of here!" Rushing to the bridge, you take your seat at the Pilot's helm. With a low roar, the engine kicks into power, with the ship shaking from the fresh Warp-Core or the collapsing desert beneath you. You're not quiet sure.

You roll a 17 on Charisma, +1, so 18.

The landing gear retracts and the ship flies into the air with a trail of sand and dust beneath it. Once in the air, everyone breaths a sigh of relief. With the desert beneath you collapsing into a fiery void, it's nice to know that you're all safe. But not for long, as you enter a deadly command. "Computer, plot a route to the Twin Towers."

You roll a 19 on Intelligence, +1, so 20.

With a reassuring click, the computer begins to plot a destination. Not towards the towers of old--no, but to the next best thing. "COURSE SET FOR THE 3RD MILLENIUM MEMORIAL TWIN TOWERS," chirps the computer. On the navigation screen, a line is drawn from the Loris Desert to the great city of Loritopia. The line passes through two great towers, which promptly fall on the map. "WARNING: COLLISION COURSE," beeps the computer, but you quickly dismiss it. As the auto-pilot takes over, you lean back and relax as you plan your act of intergalactic terror.

cromartini · November 24, 2016, 08:19:18 AM

Order the computer to turn straight into space.

tber123 · November 24, 2016, 10:05:40 AM

Look around for Space-Parachutes and jump

Drydess · November 24, 2016, 10:41:04 AM

warp onto the ship and pull the fire alarm

Redconer · November 24, 2016, 04:33:39 PM

Attempt to rally up troops to go against the treacherous Planr.