Funny Things Teachers Say Out of Context

[thomas64]

THIS IS ALL OUT OF CONTEXT! There's a whole other story to this, but that's no fun :D
Ok so I was in math and I was kinda zoning out... O.o
Anyway, I came to my senses real fast when I heard my teacher say;

"Here's my E.D.!"
and
"Do you see how I'm playing with it?"

And I was like :O
I was totally on the verge of laughing, good thing I didn't!

Anyway, what's the funniest thing you've ever heard a teacher say out of context?

what dose that mean!?!

[Ad Bot]

[n0cturni]

"it's impossible to touch your elbows behind your back" trick.

Hah, I need to try that.

[HelpingHand]

"Lakes are bigger than ponds"


WTF???!?!? I never knew that >.<

[Loopyla1]

"and to find speed, time, or distance, you can use the STD chart here"
I was just like :P wtf?
The whole class cracked up after I giggled.
Also, from the most handicapped book I've ever had to read, "Seedfolks":
"and so I saw that he got a hoe for his birthday"
"i noticed two women hoeing"
EVERYONE cracked up!

[veraza]

A kid in social studies tried to go in the teachers computer to go to some left 4 dead site today. the whole class laughed when she yelled 'DON'T GO IN MY PRIVATE PLACE!"

[tails]

i have forgotten everything teachers said now

Only thing i really hate is when they ask you a question you answer and then they say don't answer back >:(

[|Shadow]

My form tutor is awesome.
He calls people gay n stuff :D

[GhostOfBetaTapes]

We, at our school, have a rather strict rating of how good "that's what she said" jokes are.
 
Thde best one this semester was...
In class, my teacer was talking about how to handle when other people are annoying, and she said:
"...and sometimes the magic doesn't happen, and you just have ho ignore him."
I immediately sat up and said "That's what she said!" Three of the kids started laughing, and the teacher was holding laughter in. :D it was the most amazing joke yet.

[StarHawk]

lol

what dose that mean!?!

Out of context means you take a sentence, word, or phrase out of a larger discussion. Such as, if the discussion was;

Reporter:        And what did you think of the movie, sir?
Random guy:  It was definitly NOT the best movie I've ever seen!
*later that night on tv*
Reporter:        And this is what this guy had to say;
*clip of the discussion rolls"*
Random guy:  the best movie I've ever seen!

That would be taking what he said out of context. Basically, we're taking things that our teachers say, removing them from the original discussion, and only showing that thing in order to make it funny.

Like so;
BEFORE: "Don't touch my pot of soil!"
AFTER:    "Don't touch my pot!"

And it's funny because pot is a drug.
Get it?

[General Nick]

One of the 8th graders did this. I'm using example names.

Teacher: Who can do problem 69 from the math homework?
Julie: I can do 69!
John: Wow, you can do 69 Julie?
Julie: Yes, I can.
John: Wow, I'm amazed!
/laugh everyone

[Loopyla1]

69 problems?
Damn!

[bikerdude3000]

69 problems?
Damn!

not so much...i think he means 69 BITCHES

[StarHawk]

......AWWWWKWAAAAAAAAAARD! it says "awkward" for those who can't read stretch :D

[Shadow Eye25]

In Algebra, we were discussing about multiplying binomials and trinomials, and our teacher called them bi's and tri's for short.

My response?  A TRI???? DISGUSTING!

/class and teacher laugh

[Exo Pheratype]

not so much...i think he means 69 BITCHES

[facepalm]  69 is a position, not a number of people >.>

I was just sitting in my desk reading a book, when my teacher dropped her lesson plans in a small unfinished hole in the tiles, she asked me to get it and I agreed.

I was reaching my hand in their when she tried to give me pep talk

"Okay, yeah stick your hand in that hole and just grab like crazy"
"Can you stick in all the way? Ill help if you can't get the hang of it"
"Come on, get your head in there if you can, ALMOST THERE!!!!!