SCP Megatopic - oh wow i havent seen this in a while

[Anti-Block]

Recommending "Throw D-Class at it until it stops" as the thread title.

hey

it's not like we have an unlimited amount of D-classes!

[Ad Bot]

[Skyra]

hey

it's not like we have an unlimited amount of D-classes everything!

[mp7964]

Recommending "Throw D-Class at it until it stops" as the thread title.

kk <3

[Pepsidude]

kk <3

<3

[Gojira]

i STILL wanna ride six eight two

http://www.scp-wiki.net/chowderclef

[LegendZ]

Chowderclef. Barney and Batman in one.

[Cybertails1998]

http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-even-number-j

CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█

Item #: SCP-81-J

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-81-J is to be kept in a spaghetti-lined containment chamber located in Fort Knox, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 2 metallists armed with pens.

In the event that SCP-81-J ever begins mooching its knee, Tristram is to spoon SCP-81-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Iota-7 (''"Local News"'') is to be dispatched to SCP-81-J's last known location.

Description: SCP-81-J is a blinking ferret. Like most members of its species, it is able to drink ketchup, and regularly eats twice its own weight in spaghetti each day.

SCP-81-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with knives, which causes it to turn into a flask. Whenever this happens, all fingers within a 874 kilometer radius will begin to jump uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.

In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to George Clooney. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-81-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time.

Recovery Log: SCP-81-J was first located in Mechin where the Vikings were using it in order to turn the world into a pancake. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Iota-7 (''"Local News"'') was able to recover the object with only 1001029 civilian casualties.

Addendum: Test Log 81-1

    Dr. Zhelkradt: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Zhelkradt, and I am about to test SCP-81's reaction to tooth. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Navdot?

    Dr. Navdot: Yes sir, ready to begin test.

    Dr. Zhelkradt: Excellent! I am now introducing the tooth to 81... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material.

    Dr. Navdot: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'.

    Zhelkradt: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN ELBOW! IT'S GOT MEIN ELBOW! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY!

    END LOG

In light of incident 81-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█

I don't

[Gojira]

http://www.scp-wiki.net/the-death-of-alto-clef-etc
That is THE deepest SCP story.
But really
Read the discuss
It's the best part

[Tudoreleuu]

http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-even-number-j

I don't

dafuq was that

[Decepticon]

http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-even-number-j

I don't

I remember doing one of those.

Item #: SCP-9539-J

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-9539-J is to be kept in a Cookie-lined containment chamber located in Black Dolphin Prison, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 3 Second armed with Fiive.

In the event that SCP-9539-J ever begins Hearing its Head, Johnston is to Biting SCP-9539-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Σ-7 (''Tom and Jerry'') is to be dispatched to SCP-9539-J's last known location.

Description: SCP-9539-J is a Brown Horse. Like most members of its species, it is able to Consuming flesh, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Cookie each day.

SCP-9539-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with Five, which causes it to turn into Scientist. Whenever this happens, all Five within a 224 kilometer radius will begin to Consuming uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.

In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Adolf Riddler. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-9539-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time.

Recovery Log: SCP-9539-J was first located in Mukton where the Saints were using it in order to Kill any living thing. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Σ-7 (''Tom and Jerry'') was able to recover the object with only 1500 civilian casualties.

Addendum: Test Log 9539-1

Dr. Aachen: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Aachen, and I am about to test SCP-9539's reaction to Class D Personnel . Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Herik?
Dr. Herik: Yes sir, ready to begin test.

Dr. Aachen: Excellent! I am now introducing the Class D Personnel to 9539... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material.

Dr. Herik: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'.

Aachen: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Neck! IT'S GOT MEIN Neck! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY!

END LOG

In light of incident 9539-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█

I DIDN'T MEAN FOR IT TO BE THAT WAY.

[MegaScientifical]

I want to make an SCP which explains why a lot of SCPs are listed very immaturely. It'd be safe and considered good. It'd talk about how after submitting SCP information, it is found that the information is changed to seem off and unofficial, like a non-official wrote it. This is welcomed in case such information is leaked. It seamlessly works alongside other SCPs that do similar things.
But I wouldn't write an SCP. Maybe you guys could?

[Demian]

http://www.scp-wiki.net/the-death-of-alto-clef-etc
That is THE deepest SCP story.
But really
Read the discuss
It's the best part

I liked the part where the dude tried to pet SCP-682. Holy crap he was lucky to survive it.

[TheArmyGuy]

Code: [Select]

CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█

Item #: SCP-8890

Object Class: Rare friend

Special Containment Procedures: Should be kept in a room with many gay carrots and self-pleasuring tools

In the event it should ever start spitting at the floor or acting straight, blast it with as many machine gun rounds as possible.

Description: SCP-8890 is a huge friend. It is also very rare, maybe even the only one of his kind. He is also gay, making reproduction impossible. He appears to be 9001 years old.

When it is touched all people in a 1500km radius will be returned to virgins if they are female because of how gay he is.

It also appears to bear a striking resemblance to Riddler, and he keeps screaming the words 'PANZERFAUST' and 'ZE FINEST IN GERMAN ENGUNEEIN'.

Recovery Log: It was found in a gay bar along with amny other gay people, but he was the only non-human. He was buttsecksing everyone.
Addendum: Test Log T-90

  

 END LOG


[TeslaCoil]

A good picture for an original SCP if you can think of one.

[Alteration]

A good picture for an original SCP if you can think of one.

SCP-XXXX (The Runner)

Class: Euclid

Picture tagline:
SCP-XXXX while running; speed clocked at around ████ MPH.

Containment:
SCP-XXXX is to be kept in an steel-walled room with an overhead entrance and inclined floor to prevent escape.

Description:
SCP-XXXX is a humanoid creature weighing at ██ ounces due to it's hollow body. SCP-████ has the ability to break through many substances, including wood, drywall, iron and ████ by running at fast speeds, despite it's hollow body and light weight. While on the ground, it can reach speeds between 250 to █████ MPH's, however cannot move drasticaly upwards or downwards without signifigantly slowing down, and cannot move directly verticaly under it's own power. SCP-████ has a seemingly immense hate for humans, and will attempt to kill them if given the chance. SCP-████ is also completely silent, both in regards to it's movement and vocalisms.

I did a lot of re-arranging and stuff so it might seem jumbled, but I was going for an outlineish description.