Feed it bacon
isnt that how mad cow disease started
jack off
Either find a safe (not knives) way of killing it, or call animal control. Either one works for the most part, but killing it and having someone that isn't a professional try and butcher it can result in nastiness if done improperly.
I'm also filming it.
Dumb question, any chance you'll be able to upload bits of it? Kinda curious what kind of pig it is.