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You're missing the point entirely and as a society we've been over this countless times. The N-word isn't just about syllables, its about history, power, and who has the right to reclaim it. Black people using "brother" with each other is a form of reclamation, a way to flip a weaponized word into something communal. You, me, or any other non Black person don't get to decide it means respect just because it feels easier for us that way.
Saying "if I treat them like equals, I'll use the word too" isn't treating them like equals, its ignoring their lived experience and centering your own comfort. Equality isn't pretending history never happened; it's respecting boundaries that exist because of history. The N-word was specifically brought into the lexicon in its current context by white slavers in reference to black slaves. It has always been a word about dehumanization.
And no, its not about babying your language, its about not cosplaying oppression. If Black folks in your neighborhood are cool with you saying it, that's between you and them. But pretending that means its universally fine is like saying, "my buddy lets me smoke in his car, so I guess its cool to light up in any strangers car too." Context matters, power dynamics matter, and dismissing all that as who gives a forget is exactly the kind of casual ignorance that keeps these conversations going in circles.
