Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: Hello.
You: how are you?
Stranger: I am very well and now tell me how you yourself are doing.
You: I am doing brilliantly, thanks.
Stranger: Well then, we are in agreement, both of use is doing so in a range from very well to brilliant.
Stranger: *ys
Stranger: *us
You: That is true.
Stranger: Forgive my grammatical error, twice over.
You: You are forgiven.
Stranger: I appreciate the nature it takes to forgive someone of so henious a crime.
You: The crime committed was not worthy of anything less than forgiveness.
Stranger: And now, let us celebrate this new friendship with tea on the patio.
You: That sounds like a fine idea.
Stranger: *pours you tea, loses grip and scalds you*
Stranger: Oh my.
Stranger: Oh my goodness.
You: Well.
You: *Cleans*
Stranger: Dear Lord, are you ok?
You: Yes, I'm fine, just a little warm.
Stranger: How could you possibly forgive me now? Surely this was the act which signaled the end to a once promising friendship.
You: No, of course not. You should know my views on forgiveness. Even this does not deserved to go without forgiveness. Please, just pour me another cup.
Stranger: Very well, and you don't know how much I appreciate the gesture. *pours another cup, drops cup, shards from cup become lodged in your eyes and face*
Stranger: This is the worst thing I've ever done.
You: Ah, this is fine, it was an accident, I understand. Would you please be so kind as to phone for an ambulance?
Stranger: I shall gather my things and leave immediately, I couldn't expect even you to forgive me.
You: No, please, stay, I'm scared.
Stranger: Of course, I will phone post haste. *goes to phone police, slips, hand hits frying pan which in turn power on an overhead fan which catches on your scarf and twists around your neck, slowly choking you*
Stranger: *unaware* Yes ambulance? Come right away.
You: *.....ghugugh...*
Stranger: Don't worry, they are co- OH MY WORD
Stranger: *turns off fan*
Stranger: Can you breathe?
You: *...g...gu...ahh.*
You: Yes, I'm okay now. *Inhales*
Stranger: Why would continue such a friendship with me now?
Stranger: There is no logical reason to.
You: Because you stayed with me. I need a friend like you, whom I may trust with my life.
Stranger: If you trust me with your life you are very gullible friend.
You: *raises eyebrow* Why so?
Stranger: Because, I was really trying to kill you on purpose muahahhaah *goes to intentionally kill you with knife, trips over scarf that you put on the ground, falls and impales self*
You: *Backs away towards counter and reaches in drawer for gun*
You: *Circling your impaled body* Who are you?
Stranger: Oh dear, there must be some irony in this, but I can't focus right now, due to blood loss.
You: Drop the attidude, punk. Who are you? Who do you work for?
Stranger: Who am I? I am a simple man, who wanted only companionship in the world, companionship I could then kill and bury in my yard.
You: Do not make up such ridiculous lies. Is it Rodolpho? Hans? JJ>
You: WHO DO YOU WORK FOR? *roosters gun*
Stranger: You dare to speak Hans' name aloud?
You: It is he who should dare not to speak MY name.
Stranger: He is watching everywhere, good sir, EVERYWHERE.
You: So, *moves gun upwards* it was Hans? You're his little slacky.
Stranger: *laugh bitterly* You don't know of what you do, you ignorant man.
You: *slaps* How dare you refer to me as "man"? I am better than your pathetic race? I am your QUEEN.
Stranger: Remember when your mother went missing? Remember how you CRIED and wept for months?
You: Don't drag my mother into this.
Stranger: She's still alive you know. In fact she's closer than you think.
You: *laughs* You think you can play me like that? You think that you pretend she's alive so I will give you what you want.
You: Well forget YOU.
Stranger: I know something only she would know. Perhaps this will ring a bell: "Red cherries on the hill"?
You: No. No no no no no. She would never mention that to anyone.
You: *angering*
Stranger: Oh my poor wretched man/woman, haven't you pieced it together? Don't you know why Hans never shows his face?
You: Because he knew if he did, my gang would be on him like ants to food.
Stranger: Because "he isn't a "he" at all. Hans is simply a pseudonym for......for Martha. For your mother Martha.
You: *Laughs* You've signed your own death warrant young man.
You: Why would my own mother want to kill me? Her only daughter? *:Laughs* Yeah, right.
You: You know something? Cissie? Your darling girlfriend. The dead, murdered one?
Stranger: She has been the underboss of our organization long before you were born.
You: *Smiles*
Stranger: Yes, in fact she has her own plot right out in the yard.
You: HANS ARRANGED FOR HER DEATH.
Stranger: WHO DO YOU THINK KILLED HER
You: I know who killed her.
Stranger: I would follow Hans to the grave, and I killed her because Hans is the one true entity.
You: Your guilt should have killed you by now.
Stranger: I replace all emotions with Hans. She's very...HANS on in my life.
You: You know what I don't understand? You drive all the way up here, to have an argument. I think you've got another agenda.
You: What is it, you weakling?
Stranger: Only that Hans wanted you to know of her identity, and that I should kill you right after I revealed it.
You: Well you will not kill me.
Stranger: You seem right.......ab-......*trails off and dies*
Stranger: END SCENE 1
You: :)
Stranger: That got out of hand quickly.
You: Haha, indeed.
Stranger: I must revert back to conversational mode, which might take a slight period of adjustment.
You: That's fine.
Stranger: *begins reverting*
Stranger: 12%
Stranger: 45%
Stranger: 78%
Stranger: 92%
Stranger: 98%
Stranger: Reverting process complete.
You: Success.
Stranger: Would you like to install Windows now?
You: Which version?
Stranger: XP
You: Yes.
You: >format c:
You: >Are you sure you wish to format Drive C:?
You: >Y
Stranger: N
You: >Operation aborted.
Stranger: CRITICAL ERR DOS/
Stranger: MASSIVE SYS FAIL
You: >ERROR! ERROR! Sys32 file not located.
You: >Please cut all the cables.
Stranger: Self destruct sequence initiated
You: >Press alt + F4 to stop.
Stranger: 3
Stranger: 2
Stranger: 1
Stranger: ALT F4
Stranger: Destruc sequence aborted.
You: WIN
Stranger: That was close.
You: I know.
Stranger: Remember when it was counting down and I had to press ALT F4 to make it stop.
Stranger: *awkward silence*
You: It was a hard time.
Stranger: Notice how we have avoided normal converation entirely.
Stranger: Quite the feat I must say.
You: I think so too.
You: Is there anything normal you'd like to share?
Stranger: Not really, I'm quite dull.
You: Fair enough.
Stranger: And you must initiate all topics henceforth, for I am quite drained from the recent harrowing experience.
You: Unfortunately I must move on. Princeton is calling me.
Stranger: That swine.
You: Tell me about it.
Stranger: James Princeton is quite the rouge.
You: And ever so flirty!
Stranger: *clenches fist angrily* That.....that fiend!
You: What? Do you have some issue with who flirts with me?
Stranger: What? No, no of course not *pats brow with kerchief* what ever gave you that idea.
You: *Embarrased* Nothing, I just.....
You: Never mind.
Stranger: *checks pockewatch to avoid awkward moment*
You: *awkward moment still ensues*
Stranger: So, I hear...you like pinwheels.
Stranger: *curses self under breath*
You: Yes.... *looks around* they are... fascinating.
You: Well, I'm sorry, but I guess I should get my Father to collect me.
Stranger: Father like a priest or father like a father?
You: My Daddy.
Stranger: Very good, I er...um, if you're ever in the neighborhood again....
You: *Scratches head* But I know nothing about you!
Stranger: You should get those fleas removed from your head.
You: Well now I know you're ignorant. *Humphs*
Stranger: I uh....no, I was just.....so....
Stranger: I hear you women enjoy talking about yourselves.
You: Perhaps some of us do.
Stranger: Well go on then, and talk.
Stranger: About yourself.
You: Unfortunately I can't, kind stranger. I have many real aspects of my socially engineered, government-operated life to attend to. But I did have a blast.
You: Goodbye, Sir.
Stranger: *passive aggression* Oh no big deal, I didn't care anyway.
You: Au revior. *Gets into limo.*
Stranger: *watches limo drive off and hangs head in shame*
You: *the wind whispers "goodbye."*
