this is an extremely resilient man to survive literally having his chest torn in and both one of his lungs destroyed. what the forget did you implant in him besides that chip?
DONT ASK ME. NONE OF US KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO JOSHUA AFTER HE HAD HIS FREAKOUT, OR WHY JOSHUA IS SO HEAVILY ARMED.Try to lead the police officers away.
"A rogue vending machine, you say? I saw one run around the corner left of me, straight down the road."
frame another vending machine
VendOS:"It wasn't me! I was framed by another vending machine! Go straight around the corner and you'll see---"Officer: "Bullstuff! You're the only Vending Machine with legs out there!"
Prove your innocence by singing the National Anthem upside down while reading the Bible on your phone.
VendOS: "O sɐʎ ɔɐu ʎon sǝǝ' qʎ ʇɥǝ pɐʍu,s ǝɐɹlʎ lᴉƃɥʇ'
Mɥɐʇ so dɹonplʎ ʍǝ ɥɐᴉlǝp ɐʇ ʇɥǝ ʇʍᴉlᴉƃɥʇ,s lɐsʇ ƃlǝɐɯᴉuƃ'
Mɥosǝ qɹoɐp sʇɹᴉdǝs ɐup qɹᴉƃɥʇ sʇɐɹs ʇɥɹonƃɥ ʇɥǝ dǝɹᴉlons ɟᴉƃɥʇ'
O,ǝɹ ʇɥǝ ɹɐɯdɐɹʇs ʍǝ ʍɐʇɔɥǝp' ʍǝɹǝ so ƃɐllɐuʇlʎ sʇɹǝɐɯᴉuƃ¿
∀up ʇɥǝ ɹoɔʞǝʇs, ɹǝp ƃlɐɹǝ' ʇɥǝ qoɯqs qnɹsʇᴉuƃ ᴉu ɐᴉɹ'
פɐʌǝ dɹooɟ ʇɥɹonƃɥ ʇɥǝ uᴉƃɥʇ ʇɥɐʇ onɹ ɟlɐƃ ʍɐs sʇᴉll ʇɥǝɹǝ;
O sɐʎ poǝs ʇɥɐʇ sʇɐɹ-sdɐuƃlǝp qɐuuǝɹ ʎǝʇ ʍɐʌǝ
O,ǝɹ ʇɥǝ lɐup oɟ ʇɥǝ ɟɹǝǝ ɐup ʇɥǝ ɥoɯǝ oɟ ʇɥǝ qɹɐʌǝ¿
Ou ʇɥǝ sɥoɹǝ pᴉɯlʎ sǝǝu ʇɥɹonƃɥ ʇɥǝ ɯᴉsʇs oɟ ʇɥǝ pǝǝd'
Mɥǝɹǝ ʇɥǝ ɟoǝ,s ɥɐnƃɥʇʎ ɥosʇ ᴉu pɹǝɐp sᴉlǝuɔǝ ɹǝdosǝs'
Mɥɐʇ ᴉs ʇɥɐʇ ʍɥᴉɔɥ ʇɥǝ qɹǝǝzǝ' o,ǝɹ ʇɥǝ ʇoʍǝɹᴉuƃ sʇǝǝd'
∀s ᴉʇ ɟᴉʇɟnllʎ qloʍs' ɥɐlɟ ɔouɔǝɐls' ɥɐlɟ pᴉsɔlosǝs¿
Noʍ ᴉʇ ɔɐʇɔɥǝs ʇɥǝ ƃlǝɐɯ oɟ ʇɥǝ ɯoɹuᴉuƃ,s ɟᴉɹsʇ qǝɐɯ'
Iu ɟnll ƃloɹʎ ɹǝɟlǝɔʇǝp uoʍ sɥᴉuǝs ᴉu ʇɥǝ sʇɹǝɐɯ:
,┴ᴉs ʇɥǝ sʇɐɹ-sdɐuƃlǝp qɐuuǝɹ' O¡ louƃ ɯɐʎ ᴉʇ ʍɐʌǝ
O,ǝɹ ʇɥǝ lɐup oɟ ʇɥǝ ɟɹǝǝ ɐup ʇɥǝ ɥoɯǝ oɟ ʇɥǝ qɹɐʌǝ˙
∀up ʍɥǝɹǝ ᴉs ʇɥɐʇ qɐup ʍɥo so ʌɐnuʇᴉuƃlʎ sʍoɹǝ
┴ɥɐʇ ʇɥǝ ɥɐʌoɔ oɟ ʍɐɹ ɐup ʇɥǝ qɐʇʇlǝ,s ɔouɟnsᴉou'
∀ ɥoɯǝ ɐup ɐ ɔonuʇɹʎ' sɥonlp lǝɐʌǝ ns uo ɯoɹǝ¿
┴ɥǝᴉɹ qloop ɥɐs ʍɐsɥǝp onʇ ʇɥǝᴉɹ ɟonl ɟooʇsʇǝds, dollnʇᴉou˙
No ɹǝɟnƃǝ ɔonlp sɐʌǝ ʇɥǝ ɥᴉɹǝlᴉuƃ ɐup slɐʌǝ
Ⅎɹoɯ ʇɥǝ ʇǝɹɹoɹ oɟ ɟlᴉƃɥʇ' oɹ ʇɥǝ ƃlooɯ oɟ ʇɥǝ ƃɹɐʌǝ:
∀up ʇɥǝ sʇɐɹ-sdɐuƃlǝp qɐuuǝɹ ᴉu ʇɹᴉnɯdɥ poʇɥ ʍɐʌǝ'
O,ǝɹ ʇɥǝ lɐup oɟ ʇɥǝ ɟɹǝǝ ɐup ʇɥǝ ɥoɯǝ oɟ ʇɥǝ qɹɐʌǝ˙
O ʇɥns qǝ ᴉʇ ǝʌǝɹ' ʍɥǝu ɟɹǝǝɯǝu sɥɐll sʇɐup
qǝʇʍǝǝu ʇɥǝᴉɹ loʌǝp ɥoɯǝs ɐup ʇɥǝ ʍɐɹ,s pǝsolɐʇᴉou˙
qlǝsʇ ʍᴉʇɥ ʌᴉɔʇ,ɹʎ ɐup dǝɐɔǝ' ɯɐʎ ʇɥǝ Hǝɐʌ,u ɹǝsɔnǝp lɐup
Ԁɹɐᴉsǝ ʇɥǝ Ԁoʍǝɹ ʇɥɐʇ ɥɐʇɥ ɯɐpǝ ɐup dɹǝsǝɹʌǝp ns ɐ uɐʇᴉou¡
┴ɥǝu ɔoubnǝɹ ʍǝ ɯnsʇ' ʍɥǝu onɹ ɔɐnsǝ ᴉʇ ᴉs ɾnsʇ'
∀up ʇɥᴉs qǝ onɹ ɯoʇʇo: ,Iu פop ᴉs onɹ ʇɹnsʇ˙,
∀up ʇɥǝ sʇɐɹ-sdɐuƃlǝp qɐuuǝɹ ᴉu ʇɹᴉnɯdɥ sɥɐll ʍɐʌǝ
O,ǝɹ ʇɥǝ lɐup oɟ ʇɥǝ ɟɹǝǝ ɐup ʇɥǝ ɥoɯǝ oɟ ʇɥǝ qɹɐʌǝ¡Officer 3: "JUMPIN JESUS ON A CRUCIFIXION POLE! IT MUST BE SPEAKING R'LYEHIAN! SHOOT IT BEFORE HE CAN SUMMON CTHULU!"
The Police Officers turn HOSTILE!
Start breakdancing
VendOS breakdances as the cops start shooting it! VendOS effortlessly breakdance-dodges the bullets!
say "this is all a dream, isn't it?" to the officer
scream really really loudly so you can go super sayain
VendOS: "This is all just a dream, ain't it?"Officer: "What---"
VendOS: HRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGH!
your genocide crusade begins here
fufill your primary objective at any cost
Unleash your Omnidirectional Saltwater Overdrive Blast at the areas where the officers are.
Move toward Joshua, and place him in your saltwater storage.
VENDOS. YOU ARE NOW ONE WITH JOSHUA. YOU ARE JOSHUAOS, the REINCARNATION AND EPITOME OF HUMAN AND MACHINE INRERACTION.
That's both pointless and implausible. Pointless because Joshua wouldn't be able to control the vending machine just by going inside it, and the vending machine won't become better anyway. It will just be Joshua carried inside the vending machine.
The last one is not a bad idea though.
VendOS: RETRACTING ARMS AND LEGS. INITIATING OMNIDIRECTIONAL SALTWATER OVERDRIVE.Officer: Uhoh.
VendOS releases a Omnidirectional Saltwater Overdrive Blast in a large radius around him, impacting multiple officers!
Officer 1's face is shredded!
Officer 1's ribcage is poking out!
Officer 1's stomach is eviscerated!
Officer 1's neck has been cut into bloody pieces!
Officer 1 convulses violently and colors the snow a mixture of red and yellow.
Officer 2's neck is torn off!
Officer 2's legs break off with a SNAP!
Officer 2's chest shatters into pieces!
Officer 2's everything is torn open!
Officer 2 falls apart and is dead.
Officer 3's entire body is violently mutilated!
Officer 3's jaw is torn off!
Officer 3's spine is ripped apart!
Officer 3's everything is getting ripped into pieces!
Officer 3 explodes like a blood sausage.
Officer 4 SHRIEKS IN AGONY.
Officer 4 is suffering from massive internal bleeding!
OFFICER 4 BEGS FOR MERCY.
OFFICER 4 WHINES LOUDLY, CURLS UP INTO A BALL, AND DIES.
Officer 5's brain hemorrhages!
Officer 5 reaches for his skull, and then collapses.
Officer 6 dies of internal bleeding.
Shaking my head in disappointment. Send some combine snipers.
Fire a water bottle at the right angle of attack that it bounces off all the 6 officers heads and kills them. You're a robot, right?
Call the combine,you are a combine vending machine after all. Also,why are normal police then? THESE POLICE ARE SPIES.
No longer needed: Police Officers have been brutally murdered.sacrifice yourself for the safety of joshua
Unnecessary. Police Officers killed in a single strike. forget the police.
VendOS: "I'm coming, Joshua."VendOS leaps and smashes through a window to reach Joshua!
VendOS: "JOSHUA!"Joshua is barely moving, and is breathing shallowly. He coughs up blood.
VendOS: "SPEAK TO ME, JOSHUA."Joshua is unresponsive. Blood drips from his mouth, there's a massive pool of blood under him, his torso has been torn open, and he's staring at nothing... But at least he's still breathing. Or trying to.
Donald Annoying Orange's Helicopter Pilot(Remember the chopper?): "Hey! Theres a whole lot of SWAT entering the area, we gotta evac out of this stuffhole FAST!"
VendOS grabs Joshua and makes a run for the chopper as a SWAT Team spots him and gives chase!
Donald Annoying Orange's Helicopter Pilot hauls ass as the SWAT Team fires upon him!
The helicopter starts flying to a hospital.
VendOS: "Don't you die on me now, Joshua! You can make it!"
Donald Annoying Orange's Helicopter Pilot: "I see the Hospital now! Making a landing!"
The helicopter lands.
VendOS: "You're gonna be ok!"Joshua sticks his head up and reaches for something... Until a gurgling sound escapes him, he shudders uncontrollably, and his head and hands drop down.
VendOS: "JOSHUA? JOSHUA!"
It is 10:30 PM on Tuesday, December 20. Until Joshua is captured, you will be controlling a vending machine.
VendOS is
UNDAMAGED
Joshua is
????
InventorySaltwater Bottle x25
$665
Poll
Topic: MindHive [Thread finished, now planning for Quest to Save Kompressor Redux] (Read 110603 times)