> WHAT THE forget IS GOING ON LETS HAVE A RECAPWarning: The following recap may be missing details or accuracy. This is all based off of what I can remember, since nobody has the time to go through thirty-plus pages and write all this stuff down.First Mission: John McClass delivers a briefcase to the Mafia and everything is somewhat-serious and realistic. No fun allowed, and the writing attempts to be sarcastic and intentionally misinterprets stuff. A SWAT Team forgets up the entire job, and John McClass makes an enemy of Uncle Jay (no relation), a notorious entrepreneur .
Second Mission: John McClass delivers stuff to the Roboloveual Wrangler, a place for people to have love with robots. Things start getting less serious and more fun. A grandfather starts getting mentioned, and he gradually becomes more important as the thread goes on. Gloria the Glorious, a love robot, starts a lovebot revolution, and pretty much all of John McClass's nameless coworkers are killed off. John McClass makes friends with some people and they become companions.
Intermission: John McClass escapes the lovebot revolution with his companions. He runs into a young man named Jimmy, who joins him. Jimmy takes McClass to meet an old friend, who is revealed to be Uncle Jay. A massive shootout ensues, and Uncle Jay is blown into several tiny pieces.
Third Mission: John McClass delivers letters to a bunch of grannies at the retirement home. Nothing happens for a really loving long time, his grandfather suddenly becomes even more relevant, McClass teaches himself how to do the
Cycle™, a really loving disgusting process, some more boring bullstuff happens, and then John McClass finally has some action when clones of his grandfather pop out of nowhere and start shooting at him. McClass kills the clones and flies to the Alps to make another delivery... And also search for his grandfather, too.
Fourth and Current Mission: The thread takes a nosedive into batstuff insanity and abandons the tone it had at the beginning. John McClass finds a massive village on the alps, tries to locate both his grandfather and the village leader, gets into a barfight, runs into a cybernetics lab and gets captured. It is then revealed that Benito Blue Meanie is still alive and kicking, and Blue Meanie is the village leader. McClass's grandfather is also apparently being held prisoner too. John McClass breaks out of his containment cell, slaughters several Italian Fascists, searches for his grandfather, and finds an augmentation machine. He becomes a cyborg, gains a literal split personality from getting shot in the head somehow, and is captured.
You stand in front of a large, oppressive warehouse in the really stuffty part of town. This warehouse is two stories tall, seems to have a weird smell, and has a general air of hostility. You think you can hear a power drill and someone screaming in agony inside the warehouse. The warehouse is noticeably swarming with heavily armed mobsters. It is also sunset, and the sky is all orange and pretty.> WHAT IS THISOh, how silly of me to not introduce you properly. Welcome to The Deal: Revisited. You're John McClass, a member of the International League of Couriers. You will deliver things like packages, drugs, nuclear warheads, and letters for Grandma to various kinds of people, regardless of rain, snow, bullets, atomic annihilation, pesky things such as "ethics" and "laws", and so on. Today's job is to deliver a briefcase full of drugs to the Mafia. Your orders should be simple enough. Walk in, don't piss anyone off, deliver the drugs, get the money, and walk out. That easy enough? Let's do this. Please type "START" to start this properly.> "START"Not with the quotes, you dingus khan.> STARTTo the north is the two story warehouse, where your objective is to deliver the drugs. The warehouse seems to be ominously leaning over you as it blocks out the fading sunlight. In front of the warehouse are two mobsters with kevlar-reinforced suits and ties, both of them packing a lot of heat.
To the south is a street with the occasional car passing by. This being a really stuffty part of town, nobody wants to stick around too long unless they're the cops, and even then they only stick around if they bring in the SWAT Team. You see an alleyway with some strange markings, and a conspicuous pile of rubble with a bunch of neon pink glow sticks around it, which seem to be illuminating a vague shape. You think that the vague shape could be a gun someone left around for some reason. A bunch of abandoned buildings are next to the alleyway.
To the west is the decent part of town, where the criminals aren't as heavily armed, only carrying rifles and submachine guns instead of machineguns and rocket launchers. Further to the west is the wealthy part of town, where the criminals barely even exist. As for what is to the west that is nearby, you see a sidewalk and some more abandoned buildings. There are also a bunch of mutilated bodies hanging from the street lights, most of which are broken.
To the east is another part of the really stuffty part of town that you're in. Further to the east is an abandoned construction site, and the ocean itself. You also see a foreigner wearing an American flag t-shirt hanging around a nearby alleyway, trying to call a taxicab so he can get out of this wretched hive of a city. He is wearing an oversized backpack stuffed to the point where he can't even close it, and you see several dollar bills falling out of it.
Directly above you is a plane passing by, probably carrying a bunch of people flying to a better city than this one.
Directly below you is the sidewalk you're standing on, and your two feet. There could also be mole people or something underground, but you can't see through the sidewalk.
A Mobster guarding the door shouts out: "Hey! Are you comin' in here or what? You're the guy delivering the drugs to us, right? Better get to it! Careful not to piss off the Don, though. He just finished skinning Gary alive for talking back to him during a meeting. He should be hanging from one of those street lights if you look hard enough. Poor bastard."
Time to get this party started. Please input another command.> _You are carrying a briefcase full of drugs, a smartphone, a wallet, several paper clips, pepper spray, and a metal spoon.
You are wearing regular civilian clothes that make you look like an average guy. Except for the bowler hat, though. Not too many civilians in this area wear bowler hats.
You are not injured, and perfectly fine.
Poll