The Deal: Revisited [History Repeats Itself]

[Space1255]

Answer the phone then shove it up your ass

[Ad Bot]

[Drydess]

then puke it out your mouth

[Refticus]

then eat phone which you just puked out

[Space1255]

then eat phone which you just puked out

Proceed to force it out of your belly button

[Refticus]

start an infinite cycle of eating your phone with your ass, puking it out then eating it again

[tber123]

> ANSWER PHONE

"Yo!" The manager of the Roboloveual Wrangler says over the phone. "Is that you over there on the golf cart being shot at by a bunch of other guys on golf carts?"

> MASTURBATE

Of course.

You start masturbating and climaxing loudly. "O-Okay... What the forget? I'll take that as a yes." The manager replies. "Hold on! We're coming to help!"

Half a dozen bullets strike the golf cart, narrowly missing you.

> SHOVE PHONE UP ASS

Jesus.

You shove the phone up your ass. It gets stuck in there.

You hear the crack of a sniper's bullet whizzing by, followed by someone screaming. Seems like the sniper accidentally shot his friends instead.

> FORCE THE PHONE OUT OF YOUR STOMACH

Somewhere, a neckbeard is masturbating to this.

You reach into your own ass, grab the phone, shove it in deeper, and try to shove it out your stomach. You completely fail to do so, because your arms aren't that long. And the phone isn't sharp enough for that.

A bullet strikes one of the wheels of the golf cart, popping it loudly.

> VOMIT THE PHONE INSTEAD

You vomit out the phone onto the hood of the golf cart.

Another bullet strikes a golf cart wheel. Another wheel pops.

> EAT THE PHONE WITH MOUTH

I'm seriously starting to ask questions here.

You shove the phone into your mouth and immediately vomit it out again because of the terrible taste.

> START AN INFINITE CYCLE OF ASS EATING AND VOMITING AND MOUTH EATING

Jesus loving Christ.

You constantly shove the phone up your ass, vomit it out, shove it back into your mouth, vomit again, and shove it up your ass again. While still being shot at.

As you continue doing this, you witness your unarmed companions sneaking up behind an isolated golf cart, grabbing the occupants, choking them into unconsciousness, stealing their suppressed pistols, and ambushing the enemies from behind, killing the ones in the back first so that their comrades fail to notice. Your companion with the red cap walks up to you.

"That just ain't right! We're off to go get Jimmy, and then we're getting the hell out of here. Let's go."

> _

Your inventory contains a silver, expandable entrepreneur  staff, phone, hammer, some string, a magnet, a magazine called The Manly Man's Guide to Surviving the Apocalypse, a movie poster for BRUTALITY, an article about Protagonist Syndrome, a wallet with several hundred dollars, a manual for building a flare minigun, a rubber ducky, a gas mask, and a nuclear authentication disk.

You are wearing civilian clothes and a Rolex watch.

You are healthy. Everything is wet and cold from the heavy rain. You've got a cold.


>

[Refticus]

help them but still put the phone up your ass

[Space1255]

Help them while continuing the cycle

[cromartini]

Stop the cycle and look for youre grandfather in the alps.

[ZeÜberMedic!]

make a diy golf cart launcher

[Refticus]

Stop the cycle and look for youre grandfather in the alps.

look for your grandfather in the alps while still doing the cycle so we can be accepted into our grandfathers tribe

[tber123]

> GET JIMMY BACK BUT CONTINUE THE CYCLE

You come along with your companions to get Jimmy back from the retirement home while constantly doing... The cycle. Understandably, your companions are nauseated.

> HOLD ON

What now?

> BUILD A GOLF CART LAUNCHER

You have no idea how to build one. Even if you could build a golf cart launcher, it would be impractically heavy and massive as forget.

> LOOK FOR GRANDPA IN THE ALPS WHILE CONTINUING THE CYCLE

Aided by Google Maps, You run off in the direction of the Alps, abandoning your companions and continuing the cycle. There's no way you can possibly walk to Europe since there is an entire goddamn ocean between you, but who cares? You continue walking until you get to the hills surrounding the retirement home, and then you stop.

This method of reaching the Alps is just too damn inefficient, and you can't just take a break off from work yet. You were trained since birth to be the ultimate courier, and getting fired from your job would be unthinkable. A world without things to deliver is not a world for you!

....But maybe you could ask your Boss if he has anything that could be delivered in the Alps after you finish this job, giving you the perfect excuse to both not get fired and look for Grandpa?

> _

Your inventory contains a silver, expandable entrepreneur  staff, phone, hammer, some string, a magnet, a magazine called The Manly Man's Guide to Surviving the Apocalypse, a movie poster for BRUTALITY, an article about Protagonist Syndrome, a wallet with several hundred dollars, a manual for building a flare minigun, a rubber ducky, a gas mask, and a nuclear authentication disk.

You are wearing civilian clothes and a Rolex watch.

You are healthy. Everything is wet and cold from the heavy rain. You've got a cold.


>

[cromartini]

Yeah ask the boss for jobs in the alps.

[Refticus]

scream in the phone, he'll know what it means

[Space1255]

Yeah ask the boss for jobs in the alps.