Omegle, funny conversations. Post them here.

[UnknownX]

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: lol, this thing always disconnects me, im joanna, 19 female in florida, if you wanna know more, msg me on my yahoo my screen name is joannalopez121
You: OMG
You: why
You: www.blockland.us
You: get off this site
You: or i will tear your spine out
You: ............................. ........ ............................. ...........,-~~'''''''~~--,,_
............................. ..................... ............................. .....,-~''-,:::::::::::::::::::''-,
............................. ..................... .............................,~''::::::::',::::::: :::::::::::::|',
............................. ..................... .............................|::::::,-~'''___''''~~--~''':}
............................. ..................... .............................'|:::::|: : : : : : : : : : : : : :
............................. ..................... .............................|:::::|: : :-~~---: : : -----: |
............................. ..................... ............................(_''~-': : : : : : : : :
............................. ..................... .............................'''~-,|: : : : : : ~---': : : :,'--never Gonna
............................. ..................... ............................. ....|,: : : : : :-~~--: : ::/ -----give You Up!
............................. ..................... ............................,-''':: :'~,,_: : : : : _,-'
............................. ..................... ......................__,-';;;;;:''-,: : : :'~---~''/|
............................. ..................... .............__,-~'';;;;;;/;;;;;;;: :: : :____/: :',__
............................. ..................... .,-~~~''''_;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',. .''-,:|:::::::|. . |;;;;''-,__
............................. ..................... /;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;;;;. . .''|::::::::|. .,';;;;;;;;;;''-,
............................. ...................,' ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;. . .:::::,'. ./|;;;;;;;;;;;;;|
............................. ................,-'';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',: : __|. . .|;;;;;;;;;,';;|
............................. ..............,-";;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;; ;;;; . . |:::|. . .'',;;;;;;;;|;;/
............................. ............./;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;. .|:::|. . . |;;;;;;;;|/
............................. .........../;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,';;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;; ;;;|. .:/. . . .|;;;;;;;;|
............................. ........../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;'',: |;|. . . . ;;;;;;;|
............................. .......,~'';;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;,-'';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|.|;|. . . . .|;;;;;;;|
............................. ...,~'';;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;| |:|. . . . |;;;;;;;|
............................. ..,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;/;;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;| |:|. . . .'|;;',;;;;;|
............................. .|;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-';;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;| |:|. . .,';;;;;',;;;;|_
............................. ./;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'_;;;;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;; ;|.|:|. . .|;;;;;;;|;;;;|''''~-,
............................/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;/_'',;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ,;;| |:|. . ./;;;;;;;;|;;;|;;;;;;|-,,__
........................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'...|;;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;| |:|._,-';;;;;;;;;|;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;'''-,_
......................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'....,';;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;|.|:|::::'''~--~'''||;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;,-~''''~--,
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

i feel like suiciding

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: are you still there? if not message me on my yahoo, my screen name is vanessashott
You: err
You: WHY DO I KEEP GETTING THE SAME PEOPLE?
You have disconnected.

this is getting very repeditive

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: ok, this thing is acting gay, lol, mary if this is still you, msg me on my yahoo my screen name is joannalopez121
You: ...
You: if i get you one more time...
You: i will shove that spine into your skull
You: you will disappear from humanity
You: and die
You: dora shall rape you
You: good bye
You have disconnected.

-.-

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: lol, this thing always disconnects me, im joanna, 19 female in florida, if you wanna know more, msg me on my yahoo my screen name is joannalopez121
You: ok that spine is being shoved into your skull
You: gtfo off the internet
You: dora shall rape you know
You: now*
You have disconnected.

._.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Oh man, are you still there john? if not message me on my yahoo, my screen name is joannalopez121, be waiting for you
You: WOW
You: dora has already raped you
You: get off the internet
You: before diago comes
You have disconnected.

this is the last one D: this girl is scary

[Ad Bot]

[Robo Noob]

Code: [Select]

Stranger: hu
Stranger: hi
You: hu
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: bye
You have disconnected.

Code: [Select]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: What's up?
You: What's down?
Stranger: wat
You: wat
Stranger: wat
You: watwat
Stranger: Bannanaphone!
You: Ooh!
You: Old memes are always cool!
Stranger: More like ancient lol.
You: Yarly.
Stranger: srsly.
You: Indeed.
Stranger: Commencing countdown!
Stranger: 5
Stranger: 4
Stranger: 3
Stranger: 2
Stranger: 6
Stranger: HOUSTON
Stranger: WE HAVE A PROBLEM
Stranger: D:
You: <sadface> :(
Stranger: <sidewayscreeperface> :(
You: <surprisedface> :o
Stranger: <nomoreface>
You: <welcomebackface> :D
Stranger: :D
Stranger: I can has megan fox pl0x?
You: <dissappointmentface> >:(
Stranger: Excuse me sir?
Stranger: What is your problem.
You: <tehdownzface> .   _   .
Stranger: SIR.
Stranger: I will have to ask you to leave.
You: /runs away
You: /stops
Stranger: GET BACK HERE
You: /eats table cloth
You: /starts running again
Stranger: /fires gun
You: /falls on the ground
Stranger: /becomes an hero
You: /begins to masturbate
Stranger: Too late!
Stranger: By the way
Stranger: You just lost the game.
You: GASP
You: so did you
Stranger: I haven't been playing very long.
Stranger: I lost about an hour ago.
You: Woah
You: I lost like 10 seconds ago dude
You: I feel your pain
Stranger: WOAH
Stranger: ME TOO
You: stuff
Stranger: HOLY stuff
Stranger: Dude this is forgetED.
You: /masturbates faster
Stranger: We have to tell EFG about his.
Stranger: this*
You: also /b/
Stranger: Also, roosters.
You: Also,
You: space
Stranger: Where?
You: also just ate it
Stranger: Also?
You: Also
You: You know
You: the mexican that lives down the street that your mother is secretly dating
You: but you're afraid she will beat you with a bat if you tell anybody
You: since you live in the ghetto and your skin is black
You: also you have a craving for watermelons and fried chicken
You: which makes matters worse
Stranger: forget mondayS.
You: brother plz.
Stranger: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
You: Houstan we have another problem
You: there's a spill on aisle four.
Stranger: Wtf?
Stranger: I was just in france.
Stranger: No oil tanker?
You: I masturbate sometimes with oil as lube
You: but mostly I use paint thinner
Stranger: I CAN HAS PAINT THINNER?!?!112
You: Sorry, I just ran out while I was on the floor after you shot me.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


[Moriarty]

I actually cursed out Joannalopez, but shes a loving bot :(

[UnknownX]

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hay
Stranger: 19 f
Stranger: u?
You: want to cyber?
Stranger: ya
Stranger: want u see my site?
You: no
You: forgetyou
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: oh boy, this thing is crazy, if you can read this danny, message me on my yahoo, screen name is joannalopez121, plz Pm me.
You: GET OFF
You: NOW
You: YES ITS ME AGAIN
You: DIAGO HAS YOU PINNED
You: HE IS MOVING WITH THE FLOW
You: GOODBYE
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: ok, this thing is acting gay, lol, mary if this is still you, msg me on my yahoo my screen name is joannalopez121
You: what is your problem?
You: YOUR A BIloveUAL
You: YOU loving BOT
You: GET OUT OF HERE
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: suck my rooster
You: ok
You: im f 15
Stranger: u wanna see a pic
You: no
Stranger: ok fine then u got anypics of u
You: wanna cyber?
Stranger: sure
You: ok
You: i slowly take off my pants
Stranger: omg
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

girls dont wear pants? :( i was about to say The Omegle Chat System has detected a violation of code: "Attempting to solicit love from minors". This chat log has been saved by the Omegle Chat System. Your IP has been recorded and has been reported to the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Please call your local FBI office and refer case number "46643-56" for more information.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: thi
You: hi
Stranger: hey
You: wanna cyber im 15 f
Stranger: what's up?
You: ??
You: i dont understand english
You: I UNDERSTAND BILLY MAYS
You: HELLO THIS IS BILLY MAYS HERE WITH MIGHTY PUTTY
Stranger: which language can you say
You: MIGHTY PUTTY IS NOT A GLUE
You: ITS A POWERFUL EPOXY
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hellooo
You: HELLO
You: wanna cyber im 15 f
Stranger: sure u are
Stranger: i think your're 16 m santtu
You: what?
Stranger: yea
Stranger: you know what im talkin bout
You: damn your good
You: how did you know?
You: HOW?
Stranger: I just knew :P
You: thats not fair
Stranger: o sorry
Stranger: i go b
Stranger: byew
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: lol, this thing always disconnects me, im joanna, 19 female in florida, if you wanna know more, msg me on my yahoo my screen name is joannalopez121
You: oh hi!
You: i met you!
You: did diago rape you?
You: and did dora?
You: im sorry to hear about that
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: oh boy, this thing is crazy, if you can read this danny, message me on my yahoo, screen name is joannalopez121, plz Pm me.
You: oh hi again!
You: im sorry to hear about that
You: here ill send you some flowers
You: you must still be in the hospital from rape?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello, im the most upfront person on Omegle. I would love a pic of your boobs(manboobs dont count). I will also rate them on a scale of 1-10! Thanks and have a nice evning!
You: manboobs LOL
Stranger: No, we dont like manboobs.
You: what if i get balloons and put them in my shirt?
You: does that count?
Stranger: sure.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

manboobs LOL

[pixl]

Omegle conversation log 2009-06-25
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: age/love/location/species?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[UnknownX]

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: oh boy, this thing is crazy, if you can read this danny, message me on my yahoo, screen name is joannalopez121, plz Pm me.
You: HAI
You: I LOVE YOU
You: IS YOU GAY?
You: IZ NOT
You: I LIKE YOU THOUGH
You: IM REPORTING YOUR ISP FOR TRYING TO GET ME TO GET RAPED
You: BYE
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: hello
Stranger: sup
You: sup
Stranger: soup
You: soup
Stranger: a2m?
You: a2m?
Stranger: yes
You: yes
You: ...
You: www.blockland.us
Stranger: nevar
You: yes
You: dont make me go billy mays on you
You: BUY IT
You: BUY IT
Stranger: slapchop is beeeettttteeerrr
You: no
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: 15 f los angelas
Stranger: 15 m chicago
You: cool
You: wanna cyber?
Stranger: sure
Stranger: u send pics first
You: starts to rub your breasts
Stranger: starts to finger your kitty
You: your gay
You: im male
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Oh man, are you still there john? if not message me on my yahoo, my screen name is joannalopez121, be waiting for you
You: I <3 YOU
You: GIVE ME
You: A loving BREAK
You: IF YOU DONT QUIT TALKING TO ME IM GOING TO GIVE YOUR IP TO HACKERS
You: HAVE FUN WITH NO COMPUTER!
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Haunting the cloudless black sky
Braver at night
Hidden as the lips of her cunt
She is keeping out of sight
Stranger: Dark as her closed eyelids
Her secret
She comes to you with a serpent's kiss
She has the power to foresee
Stranger: She don't fear the flames
She smile at the fire
Whisper the words of spell
Without fear without fright
Stranger: BORN FOR BURNING...
BORN
Stranger: She can't feel the pain
She gaze at the sky
In the greedy flames
She will burn tonight
Stranger: The beauty burning
Like the moon at harvest
Her seared flesh falling apart
And feed the hungry flames
Stranger: Where the flame still bite her thigh
She is not afraid to die
She will burn again tonight
(she will always burn)
But her spirit shall survive..
Stranger: how do you think being burned alive would feel?
You: hot
Stranger: don't you think there would be more to it than that?
You: hotter?
You: fiery hot?
Stranger: i guess
Stranger: think you would still have feeling in your limbs as they burst from the heat?
You: are you a bot?
Stranger: nope
You: lies
Stranger: no lies
You: orly?
Stranger: yeah really
Stranger: sup /b/?
You: 4chan cigarette
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: ............................. ............................. ....................||||
............................. ............................. ................\\.////
............................. ............................. ..................\\||||
............................. ............................. ................./.../
............................. ............................. .............../..../
............................. ............................. .........../...../
............................. .........-----....................._/......./
..\\\\\............................./..o..o.\............../.........../
....\\\\\/./.......................(....---...)......._/............./
......\....|.........................\........\___/............../
.........\.....\____________\........................../
...........\.....................................o........../
.............--____...............o.................../
.......................\--------......................../
............................. ......\.....(.)(.).........|
............................. ........)..(..)(..).......(
............................. ......./...(..)(..).......|
............................. .......|_________.|
............................. ......////////////////////||
............................. .....//////////////////==\
............................. ....|...\\\\\\\||////........\
............................. .. ./.........\\|.............\
............................. ....|............\.............\
............................. ....|............./\............|
............................. .....\.........../..\...........|
............................. .......|||||||||||/.....|||||||||||\
............................. .......|||||||||||.......\\\\\\\\|||
............................. ........||||||||||.........\\\\\\\\\
............................. ........||||||||||...........\\==..\
............................. ........=...../............\..|||||||
............................. ........|||||||/...............\\\\\||
............................. ........|||||||.................\\\\||i
............................. ........||||||/..................\\\||i
............................. .......///|||.....................|||||\
............................. ._=//////||.....................||||||\
.............................(||||||||||||||....................(|||||||)
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Paw]

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: im 21, m, usa you??
You: are you male
Stranger: yes
Stranger: you??
You: im female
You: 20
Stranger: sorry but im gay......
You: ok...
You have disconnected.



Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hai
You: f/m?
You: female or male?
Stranger: m
You: how old
Stranger: 17
You: im 18 and female
Stranger: cool whats up
You: do you like cyber love
Stranger: yes i love it
You: wanna do it
Stranger: ya
You: UHUHUH
You: *gets naked*
You: IM RUBBING MY snake UP YOUR STOMACH

3 min break....

Stranger: your snake
Stranger: ??
You: yes does it feel good
Stranger: your a girl
You: yes
Stranger: and you have a snake
You: ye- no.
Stranger: well
You: do you wanna continue?
Stranger: ya
You: lol
Stranger: lol


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: [Omegle is required by law to inform you that the person you're chatting with is a convicted child love offender. Please dont give out any personal information to this person.]
Stranger: Hi!
Stranger: How are you?
You: Hi
You: Im fine
Stranger: asl?
You: What does that mean?
Stranger: how old are you?
You: lol
You: [Omegle is required by law to inform you that the person you're chatting with is a convicted child love offender. Please dont give out any personal information to this person.]
You: It said that
You: You said that
Stranger: You're a love offender?
You: No you are
Stranger: i didnt say that
You: Omegle said you were.
You: What does asl mean.
Stranger: Awww forget!
Stranger: THEYRE ONTO ME AGAIN!

[Jimmg]

Stranger: hey
You: Hello.
Stranger: asl

Actually, I just met someone who asked me that and I added em on aim, he seems to be very literate.

[DracoSoul]

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: are you from netherlands? :)
You: I would like to suck the soul from your face.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Did I do it wrong D:

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi m/f
You: Hello.
You: f
Stranger: m 19 hre
Stranger: age?
You: 20
Stranger: cool
Stranger: from?
You: usa
Stranger: u horny or not really
You: yus
You: u have big rooster?
Stranger: 7 cut
You: me too
You: let's go

I do it right now?

[|Shadow]

SO MANY CHINESE/KOREANS/TAIWAN PEOPLE. D:

[DrMobius]

stop advertising Blockland to /b/tards

[SkyMaster]

It's lame, but

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: party on wanye
You: DORA THE EXPLORER WILL KILL YOU
You: AND RAPE YOU
You: party on garthe
Stranger: ya well, she has swine flu
You: ouch
You: aids?
Stranger: ya so we are soafe 4 now
You: 4 NOW!!!!!
Stranger: u heard me :O
You: I'm locked in a room
You: there's no escape
Stranger: O i got this
You: she could be in there too...
You: OMG THERE SHE IS!!!!!!
You: SHE GOT ME!!! SHE GOT ME!!!!!
You: AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: are you a jerk?
Stranger: yeah pretty much
You: me too
Stranger: awesome
Stranger: you bitch
You: :O
You: I'm a jerk, not a bitch
You: get it right
Stranger: jerk
bitch
same thing
Stranger: its in the bible
You: yeah, good enough
Stranger: exactly
You: are you a bitch?
Stranger: nah
You: a whore?
Stranger: naw
You: then what are you?
Stranger: i prefer thundercunt
You: oh, nice choice
Stranger: yeah i thought so
You: silence
Stranger: you can't tell me what i can and can't do
Stranger: bitch
You: I TOLD YOU I'M A JERK!!!!!
You: thundercunt
Stranger: bitch

and my personal favorite

Stranger: kayla? :) its me luis!
You: wrong person

Stranger: hi
You: Hey lovey
Stranger: @@

[DrMobius]

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: HI, BILLY MAYS HERE WITH KABOOM.
You: DO YOU HAVE LOTS OF DIRTY stuff IN YOUR HOUSE THAT NEEDS TO BE loving CLEANED UP?
Stranger: HOLY CRAP
You: THEN BUY SOME OF THIS GODDAMN KABOOM. THIS stuff COULD CLEAN THE WARTS OFF YOUR SISTER’S VAGINA.
You: YOU CAN PUT SOME KABOOM ON YOUR richard, AND IT’LL GROW 3 INCHES. THATS RIGHT. forget.
You: IN A FEW MINUTES, THERE WILL BE A GODDAMN NUMBER ON YOUR SCREEN.
Stranger: I WANTS THAT
Stranger: GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: CALL THAT stuff AND BUY SIX JUGS OF THIS loving KABOOM AND WE’LL THROW IN A SAMURAI SHARK AND SOME GODDAMN ZORBEEZ
You: WHAT ARE ZORBEEZ?
You: YOU BEST BE JOKING OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG.
Stranger: ZORBEEZ?!?1?!
You: THOSE loving TOWELS CAN SOAK UP LIKE A GALLON APIECE.
You: YOU’LL PROBABLY NEED THEM AFTER YOU SHARPEN YOUR loving SCISSORS WITH THE SAMURAI SHARK.
Stranger: GAY PRIDE!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[SkyMaster]

this guy was trying to go friggin' gansta on me and i recited the Shamwow commercial

[SkyMaster]

not what i was talking about, but funny

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: I put on my robe and wizard hat
You: it's vince here with shamwow
You: it's like a shammy
You: a towel
You: a sponge
Stranger: Are you sure it isn't like beating a hooker?
You: a regular towel doesn't work wet, this works wet or dry
You: this is for the house
You: the car
You: the boat
You: the rv
Stranger: Can I beat a hooker on a boat?