Fortunately, Unfortunately v777

[Blockchip]

Fortunately, it was all an alchohol-induced hallucination and you never died.

[Ad Bot]

[Pastrey Crust]

Unfornutately, you died of alcohol poisoning.

[Glass Joe]

Fortunately, you wake up the next day just fine because you only had like one shot of liquor and passed out, loving lightweight

[Blue Screen]

Unfortunately the black guys are somehow still alive and they have surrounded you and they are naked

[Bwopper]

fortunately they turn out to be women

[Blockchip]

Unfortunately, they cash in some of their Opression Creds™ to call in an airstrike.

[Refticus]

fortunately, you use some of your cool dude creds™ to prevent the airstrike

[Blockchip]

"Unfortunately", they complain on Tumblr about your "tribal misogynistic capitalist privilege".

[TableSalt]

Fortunately you are fresh out of forgets, and are un-phased by it.

[Blockchip]

Unfortunately, they all cash in the last of their Opression Creds™ to order a gun, and they attempt to shoot you with it.

[Bwopper]

Luckily, the gun's bullets are cotton balls that are made of edible silk

[TableSalt]

Unfortunately, they also threw a stick of dynamite.

[Buisness Mann]

Fortunatly, the dynamite is made by ACME and goes straight back to the thrower and doesnt damage the victom.

[Snaked_Snake]

Unfortunately, they fire a nuke.

[Marios]

Fortunately, the nuke is actually a giant shell which contains nothing and just makes a crater when it lands.