Summon Vladimir Putin and wrestle him
51, You summon him, but he refuses to wrestle, but instead shoot at you!
BOSS I GUESS?This is really stealing from bloodlust isn't itVladimir Putin (ARMED WITH MOSIN NAGANT)
don't become a level 30 magician
12, You're now a level 30 magician!
Summon another countryball
43, Putin turns into

live in a cardboard box mansion
53, You now have a cardboard box mansion.
Realize that you're not real, but just a figment of a forum topic called "Dice with 100 sides"
4, You die trying to realize you're not real, good job
GAME OVERThen jack off
59, You know what happens
INVENTORYSawn-off Shotgun (EMPTY)
Laser-Guided RPG-7 (LOADED)
RPG-7 rocket x5
Grenade x1
Physgun
Desert Eagle (4/9 shots left)
Dual Golden AK-47s (30/30 30/30)
AK-47 Mags x4
Space Laser (30/30 Beams left)
Space Laser Cartridge
Gravity Gun
Portal Gun
Spellbook
Long Fall Boots (WEARING)
Hipster Joe Outfit (WEARING)
$390,920
COMPANIONSBetter Puppet
Unstoppable Betelgeuse
Shia Lebouf
Phoenix #1 (ARMED WITH 3 GYM BAGS FILLED WITH MONEY)
Phoenix #2 (ARMED WITH AWM)
Phoenix #3 (ARMED WITH GOLDEN DEAGLE)
Izanagi in his More Advanced Form