You quietly tell your teammates your plan, turn yourself into an adult with the bullstuff age-changer (Taking hostages as a baby is hard), and perform.
You jump out of cover and try to take guard #3 as a human shield.
You have difficulties, so you quickly take a shot of steroids and try again.
Got him.
The ensuing situation provides a very nice distraction for The Camel, Skeleton, and a small person in robotic armor who just jumped into the room and is now shooting guards with dual Uzis.
The Camel shoots guard #5 in the back with a full blast of his 4AF shotgun, severely injuring him.
Skeleton fires 10 bullets at guard #2's chest, severely injuring him.
Robotic Armored Small Person fires one Uzi at guard #1 and one Uzi at guard #4.
14 bullets fired, 2 bullets hit.
Both guards are slightly wounded.
Guard #1 fires a large amount at Skeleton, hitting a few shots, breaking his left hand, cracking the back of his pelvis, breaking off a rib, fracturing a leg bone, and breaking his jaw-bone.
Guard #2 shoots The Camel once in the head.
Guard #3 is a human shield-hostage.
Guard #4 and #5 both fire at Robotic Armored Small Person at once, hitting him a lot and majorly injuring him.
Seeing as you've got a human shield and there are all these other people to shoot, you aren't really a high priority target right now.
Inventory
928$
Store™ order catalog
1000$ Store™ voucher
Radio
Buffed Scrap Umbilical Cord
C4 [4ha ha ha]
national socialist Propaganda
Spacesuit [Equipped]
Swastika Cap
Combat Knife
German Combat Armor
Bullstuff Age-Changer
RPG [1 rocket]
Frag grenade [2]
GN-30 pistol 11/11 bullets, 0 clips spare
Makarov pistol 12/12 bullets, 4 clips spare
M16 assault rifle 32/32 bullets, 1 magazine spare
Laser Sighted Polstag Shotgun 7/8 shells, 8 shells spare
Silenced Uzi [30/30 bullets, 0 clips spare]
Steroids [4]
Turtle Potato Chips
Beer bottle [2]
Wrench
Scrap Manual
Dealer Outfit
Balaclava
People
Guard #1, armed with M60 Machine gun, is slightly wounded.
Guard #2, armed with Silenced JH Pistol, is severely wounded.
Guard #3, armed with Dual Makarov Pistols, is completely fine except for the whole human shield thing that's currently happening.
Guard #4, armed with NDO Laser Rifle, is slightly wounded.
Guard #5, armed with Raflag Rifle, is severely wounded.
You, armed with Combat Knife, are completely fine.
Skeleton, armed with a B420 SMG, has a broken left hand, cracked pelvis, has a missing rib, a fractured leg-bone, and a broken jaw-bone.
The Camel, armed with 4AF Shotgun, is very wounded.
Robotic Armored Small Person, armed with dual Uzis, is majorly injured.
Objects
Nuclear Launch Controls
Guitar
Armed 47_DR Explosive
Objectives
Fly to the united states of america or nuke it
Assassinate president Obama
Stop a national socialist Protest Riot
Destroy The Statue of Liberty