Somemong: Rolled 6You charge up a massive energy ball hadouken style, launching it straight at the tank inflicting 71 damage, however your hands are severely burned in the process. -1 HP.
tber123: Rolled 3You search for the nearest passerby to use as a cannonball. Unfortunately there is nobody nearby.eboyblue10: Rolled 6You harness the power of the banana gods, unleashing a potent Banana Slamma! inflicting 83 damage, however you slip on a nearby Banana Peel. -1 HP.
Rabbot32: Rolled 1You squint ominously at the tank. However, you squint too hard, causing your brain to explode for some reason. Brains all over the floor now, and guess who has to clean that up?!NotBomberguy: Rolled 3You scream at the tank. But it does nothing, it's a tank.GrapeJellyToastMan: Revived }]Crazy[{You violently start to fellate the dead }]Crazy[{, miraculously bringing him back to life! While also giving you a "creamy treat" Mother of god whySpace1255: Rolled 3You scream wildly as you unleash your fist of justice. But you unleash it at the wrong place, causing it to be harmless.CRITAWAKETS: Rolled 4The Dreadnought launches it's fighters, swarming the tank and unleashing a heavy barrage of fire! Inflicting 66 damage. -1 Dreadnought HP.
SubDaWoofer: Rolled 6You begin to make preparations for the nuke. You stumble upon a soviet military bunker holding gigantic quantities of explosives, weapons, and ammunition.Redconer: Rolled 1You pull out a medication pill and quickly ingest it. Only to quickly realize that you mixed up your medication with a Cyanide Pill. Why the hell would you carry a cyanide pill WITH YOUR MEDS?!TristanLuigi: Rolled 5You dual-wield a pair of assault rifles and go nuts. In doing so, you become exceptionally badass and inflict 78 damage.
The Panzer I explodes in a hail of shrapnel
Players:
Hawt: 3/3
Bing2: 3/3
NotBomberGuy (and a Tiger I):3/3 3/3
tber123: 3/3
Twix: 3/3
Mr Queeba: 3/3
Cybertails1998: 3/3
MoltenKitten: 3/3
Space1255: 4/3
Rabbot32: Squinted too hard, now he made a mess
TristianLuigi: 2/3
eboyblue: 2/3
SubDaWoofer: 3/3 (has boiling veins)
Juncoph: 2/3
CRITAWAKETS: 3/3(Dreadnought HP:1/3) (SHIELDED)
Potatoh: 3/3
GrapeJellyToastMan: 3/3 (Compound HP: 3/3) Contains Hospital
Soldier available!
Man of Greenish: 3/3
Mobile Command Center: 18/18 Armed with Rocket Turrets
}]Crazy[{: 3/3 He got his fuggin dicc suckt
Somemong: 2/3
KV-2: 3/3
Redconer: Ingested a Cyanide Pill
JamesH: 3/3
Amazon Prime TerminalTM: 3/3
Ordering: Mech, 2 turns left
Failbros2 will introduce the next enemy tank at a future date.