so then i guess my IQ doesn't define my intelligence
Of course it doesn't. Intelligence is not quantitative, IQ is literally a number.
my semen doesn't define my child, right?
Of course it doesn't, because your child isn't a giant sperm cell. You need two cells to make a child. As children develop they are also influenced by the hormones present in the womb.
So actually, your semen/child brown townogy is pretty good. Genitals can contribute to someone's gender identity, but it certainly doesn't end there.
are you really sure that you want to say that they don't define gender?
yea