Author Topic: Celau - bear with me here  (Read 6861 times)

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Alright we’ve all got our friendly neighborhood guy-who-stuffs-on-you here but let me shed some light on the reason celau is a big deal for a solid plethora of people:

First off, a little history lesson for those out of the loop. This guy’s blown through countless accounts in his time here. Let’s start off with cone2, skipping the really young one (that’s excusable). Essentially the extent of this account’s legacy is that he made a stuffload of topics in clan discussion and tried desperately to get people to like him. Now he may be like 12 at this point, but it foreshadows pretty nicely if you think about it.

Next in line is Eon1, a name which he’s turned into such a meme for himself that nobody ever actually remembers the reason people didn’t like him. For starters, he was completely obsessed with getting people to like him by starting all kinds of projects and groups.2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12 Now you may be thinking “oh damn that’s a lot of stuff for a year of posting” but wait—there’s more. Eon’s discovered a better way of getting people to like him: bashing on people that other people don’t like13,14,15,16,17,18.

Thus began the whole “celau = makes dramas” shindig. But what befell of our trusty hero? Well you’ll probably notice I didn’t link the cone2 account—no, it’s not because I’m incompetent, it’s because he gave out his login information to several people, notably jiggy/dezi19 and bedpost/chadmaverick/flowey/roule/etc.20 Apparently, he started using his eon account to start over on the forums with a blank canvas to hide his past with cone2, but instead used said canvas to paint a lovely rembrandt-esque depicting beautiful scenes such as gore bombs and sucking the nigerian cunts’ richards until they accepted him.
So a few months have gone by. Eon quit blockland for good? Are we in the clear? Nope, he just pulls the whole tabula rasa “new man” bullstuff again by acting like a new guy under his celau21 account. Now this account didn’t last long because he got banned after being mistaken for kahnu (at least I think so, badspot wasn’t ever very clear on that), but an honorable mention is that he started working on a project that actually started going somewhere until his apathy killed it22


And here we can introduce kelau23, who came back shortly after his last key’s ban when somebody (conan I think) bought him a key to keep working on block tactical, which eventually became BL:CS24. So a few months of stuffposting fly by until december, when grimlock25 breaks the news that celau/kelau was, in fact, eon/cone226. After lots of claims of doctored evidence begin to fly around, I decide to trust in cel’s story (we were friends) and defend him in the drama because while I didn’t hate eon I wasn’t super close to him and the whole gore/NC thing sealed the deal for me that I didn’t like him (also a dude I know is hella more credible than ravencroft and grimlock lol). Anyhow I was vehemently defending celau and eventually badspot explained his bans, following celau breaking out into the thread and said basically that he’d been lying to everybody for 13 pages and half a year.

In the middle of that drama kelau was banned, and he created zelau27 to defend himself. The whole account was nothing notable, apart from dramaing the nigerian cunts and shizza, but the kicker really comes in how he got banned: abusing the table exploit in original smf so that his account was banned permanently (along with enough others for a solid purge) and tables were removed as a tool on the forums.

On a side note, celau also has a fairly plentiful discord history. He frequented Entropia for a long time, until well after he made his discord servers—the chad republic(s), schmucks, and also the furred reich, which he’s referenced a few times before but never really explained. Long ago, geben, cubone, kant, celau and I were all in a group all the time, played games, chatted often, etc. You see, we were all great friends with no gripes because of a common interest- we’re all furries. No exceptions, yes, that means our man of the hour celau himself is a gay furry. This guy could navigate e621 like loving magellan too, not like he’s just some average loveually curious ol’ joe. His animal of choice, you ask? A raven. After a few nice months he got pissy and came across the revelation that he should care more about his image than his friends, so he left the server and got beef with us in favor of appeasing his furry-resenting friends. Because it really ain’t a drama without some furry drama aye
(referenced here if you’re wondering)

Also lol



Now it’s time to talk about some more recent events. On the forums not so much, although he did have xelau28 and selau29 keys made, both after saying he wouldn’t be coming back. Discord drama, however, is the past year’s poison after a long forum trek.



Sorry about the two posts, this thing went over the character limit

Exhibit A: Hypocrite

To people who have asked me what my gripe with celau is, this is probably the first thing I said--that he’s a hypocrite. Now that’s pretty easy to just say on a whim but, believe it or not, there is a reason I mention this a lot, and it’s not just because I like the word. For starters, watching a ukrainian kid starve to death is preferable to this guy’s sense of humor. I mean honestly what he personally thinks is funny is just reciting lyrics from songs he likes when someone is mad at him, and most anything genuinely funny that he says he’s taken from someone else and made it his own. Ex. his whole discord server schmucks was essentially born and raised by the people he’s weeded out over the last yearish, and he constantly strokes his rooster to there being two hundred and something members in his server.

Honestly most if it is outside of schmucks and in deleted discord servers but he also spammed the schmucks invite on the new years blockland and discord server (after agreeing to leave schmucks out of the event unless people asked) and pretty much in any other server he can get on.
Anyways back to the point--he’s not funny, we’ve established that, but how’s that hypocrisy at all? Well, for starters, enter darth c3p030, who was constantly excluded from playing games because he wasn’t funny and used repetition as his only base for humor, and eventually banned for the same thing. Wait, doesn’t this sound a little familiar?





Oh, right.
Ironically, darth’s humor in schmucks revolved completely around celau’s humor--painfully so to a degree that even celau was annoyed by it, but his own humor nonetheless--and honestly I can’t argue with darth being alienated, because it would’ve happened regardless of celau seeing as he was constantly trying to fit in. The issue at hand, however, is that he’s hypocritical. So, let’s get a few more examples. Subdawoofer was drama’d31 for being annoying, funny how that happens. Also:


Alright, little explanation time here--celau got mad at renousim for winning at a game of hearts of iron iv so he removed renousim from the game and unadded him on steam. After that, reno sent that message to schmucks and got banned soon after literally just for that. And yet he calls out everyone else for being a sperg haha

(he’s talking about brine/unova/verification here after he got banned)

Moving on, him having autism attacks regularly and strokes as jokes isn’t the extent of what makes him a dipstuff. Celau plays crown’s jailbreak pretty much every second it’s hosted, I’m sure if I bothered crown he could tell me his playtime on the server. Why does this matter? Well, despite playing the server 24/7, he raids the discord server:

Then later on he gets wardenbanned for 25 rounds because he was using an alt to evade his bans...

...and he immediately screams about how dumb the server is. For those who aren’t familiar with the server, a wardenban basically means you can’t be the position on the server in charge of controlling the prisoners and having a semblance of power over them. The game’s still completely playable and a fantastic server without the ability to play this role, I mean hell he can still be a guard, but funnily enough celau really only plays it to go on a power trip and be in charge.


Exhibit B: No self control, manipulative

I’ll start off big here. New years32 was a mess because of its horrible management: no schedule was ever made, only a handful of the team was active, and celau’s apathy in his ownership caused none of this to ever get rectified. However, the greatest management issue was that celau was exploiting both drendran and the clique in this whole mess, basically up until the couple of days before new years eve. Somewhere out of his ass he pulled out the grand ol’ idea to get both the clique’s new years content from previous years and drendran’s hosting service--the two groups were still pretty damn heated with each other--by just simply hiding the fact that the other was working on the project from them. Drendran didn’t know for a while that nal and jam jar were helping out, nal and jam jar didn’t know drendran was hard at work scripting and hosting.




Celau essentially instructed me to lie to the two groups for his “master plan” and that they’d be told the day after the event was finished and they had any leverage on him. Evidently they both figured it out pretty quickly, and they fortunately made up with each other afterwards.

Okay, so let’s skip past the making-of-newyears thing and move on a bit. One of my other significant issues with the way new years was executed was celau and kidalex’s hate boners for kenko. When celau initially posted the topic for new years (without letting me know, after he agreed to check with me first before posting it), kenko made a remarkably stupid (yet somehow insightful) post about how he had low expectations for the project.
i have super low expectations. also i love the logo that was made in ms paint 👀
I assumed that after the us-versus-him argument ended everybody had cooled themselves, but apparently celau had other plans. When kenko joined new years with some of his friends, they might’ve been impressed by it for only a few minutes. Not like kenko could do much about that, though--he was jailed permanently for no given reason and harassed by celau and kidalex until he eventually left and had fun with his friends elsewhere. Now here I was under the assumption that when celau said that biases and grudges wouldn’t be kept for the sake of the project being successful, he actually meant it, but it seems he was just trying dismissing me so that I wouldn’t argue about it and instead spend christmas day working on building the server. Chatter about this on the topic shown below
shoutouts to celau for jailing me permanently for no reason? could ez bypass with an alt but lol what's the point
it's pretty damn pathetic if you're jailing me for getting angry at me just cause i commented on the lackluster OP. it's what you'd expect from celau lmao


EDIT: also having kidalex as an admin is a great decision
oh My loving GOD brother everythang Yo bitchass Say sound fukkin STOOPID
like brother just SHUt tha FUCC UP PLEASE brother

also Bruh you werent fuccin "commenting"" you were Fukkin BITCHING ABOUT IT FOR FUCCIN 87 FUKKIN YEARS brother
LISPY JIMMY O_O
celau ur just proving him right smh
yeah lol i was invited to the new years discord to try and figure out why i was jailed and they insisted i fight kidalex in-game. as if that does anything to help the situation
as soon as i said no they immediately banned me. what a shame that we let them host this years new years at a fantastic 1000 ping 🤔
oh My loving GOD brother everythang Yo bitchass Say sound fukkin STOOPID
like brother just SHUt tha FUCC UP PLEASE brother

also Bruh you werent fuccin "commenting"" you were Fukkin BITCHING ABOUT IT FOR FUCCIN 87 FUKKIN YEARS brother
LISPY JIMMY O_O
celau ur just proving him right smh
yeah lol i was invited to the new years discord to try and figure out why i was jailed and they insisted i fight kidalex in-game. as if that does anything to help the situation
as soon as i said no they immediately banned me. what a shame that we let them host this years new years at a fantastic 1000 ping 🤔
They obviously weren’t taking any of his comments seriously and were just focusing their mind on the whole “epicly owning” shindig of “””ironically””” being a flippant sperg.

Anyways a few weeks after new years I approached celau about how he still hadn’t released the content—regardless of his promises to get it all out by january second—and he apparently just hadn’t done it because of his laziness, and was just screwing with me and being a jackass instead of giving me anything remotely useful.







Exhibit C: Narcissistic troll

While I was on the schmucks discord server, I actually enjoyed it a lot. A good deal of the people that frequent it are actually okay and just make me feel better to chat to--the other active ones, however, were just bluntly starfishs always on the prowl for somebody to stuff on. These people regularly partook in discord raids, in which an invite was posted in chat and ten-ish people moved in storm to spam, harass, and troll their target of choice. Oftentimes a reason wasn’t even needed for these guys to join the server celau told them to. I compiled a brief list of some servers that jumped out to me:













The reason this is relevant, other than the obvious celau et al being douches, is that celau makes a habit of surrounding himself with a bunch of yes men who’ll just do his bidding to appeal to him without putting much thought into it. It’s a pretty common symptom of being an autocratic narcissistic asshat that gets off to people showing him how much they like him. It’s also a pretty significant symptom of sociopathy and psychopathy.


Exhibit D: Violent, sociopathic

I would’ve led with this one but it’s a lot less evidence-based regardless of the claims. Anyways, it’s more about his sociopathic and narcissistic tendencies and actions.

To start, celau got suspended from his high school for choking one of the people there. Since I don’t go to his loving high school or stalk him I’m just assuming based on the fact that he got suspended for a good amount of time that it wasn’t exactly self-defense.

(Context: edd is memeing with celau about how he got suspended)


(Context: celau claims he took an IQ test and either a) he’s bullstuffting to make himself look like an intellect or b) celaus actually smart yet takes on the persona of a complete retard to manipulate people)


Also, celau apparently made a phishing site to get “over a hundred roblox accounts” allegedly, “learning it on his own.” Note the aforementioned genius thing



Celau obviously has an extreme superiority complex and enjoys making other people feel like stuff for his own personal benefit--along with being forgeted enough to self-teach how to effectively scam and con people.

Oh right, he’s also an addict by choice. Don’t have pics of logs or anything though because it was all said ingame and I didn’t take pictures


Exhibit E: Malicious

Now, we can’t forget that we are on the blockland forums, not the discord forums. So, enough of discord for now; let’s give a recent instance of how celau is malicious that’s actually relevant to people. Several months ago back in August, planr made a drama about how weathernerd/renderman in a bowl33, a friend of celau’s, was spamming malicious links through blockland servers and glass chat. Why is this important? No, not because of guilt by association or whatever, but because he stole weathernerd’s key to do so. Want proof? You got it:




He took torin’s name and weathernerd’s account to spam in blockland, then before it was revoked moved the name to BLID 230029, after which he sold me the key. Frustratingly, however, he continued to use the key after I paid money for it, and got the key banned from several servers because of it. He eventually took the name “new years” on the key, so after new years was over I put the key into my own account--since it was my own key in the first place--leading us into our next topic.


Exhibit F: Manipulates friends

Cubone34 is probably the one closest friend I’ve come across in this community, and I’ve consistently been friends with him better and longer than anybody else in my life (online or real life). Now I respect this guy’s choices since I know he’s not an idiot, and if cubone would ever decide to differ in opinion so be it, and I’ll be knowledgeable as to the fact that maybe his side isn’t as bad as I think it is. Anyhow, remember the key thing I mentioned earlier? Well, he got pissed at me taking the name and started this as a whole thing:
(Context: celau bought cubone a key after microedge got his last one revoked; if celau emails badspot to revoke the key we both shared, celau, cubone, and my keys will theoretically be revoked because of this)









Despite celau hanging cubone’s key over my head, he never got a response from badspot and no keys were deactivated (thankfully).

So I’ve put up with the two of them being for a while since celau was good for cubone and they were pretty tight friends and all until,,,,,, subito,,,,,,,,,,,,

Alright so right before this I made a discord server to richard around in with my friends (the “:^) clan server35”) and celau joined so I humored him for a bit then kicked him when he was getting annoying. In response he raided the server (much like that of many others’) with a bunch of people from schmucks and I eventually just deleted the server when I went to bed because I didn’t feel like waking up to a bunch of retards having stuff up my thing at 3 in the morning. Cubone was on my side at this point in time and celau was feeling pretty left out so he started complaining to hulk hogan (a friend of both of ours) about cubone, as seen above.

Now you’ve gotta understand here that cubone’s had celau’s back cleanly for several years and now he comes outta nowhere calling cubone out for being a “manipulative piece of stuff,” blaming all his issues with the nigerian cunts on him. Also notice how his main claim is “man I bought him stuff so why doesn’t he like me” like dude cmon now, there’s gotta be something more worth arguing about than a few bucks you worked hard to earn in all your different fake jobs.
This is really just one instance of celau just cutting off somebody who’s been close to him for a significant period of time. He’s been through the whole thing with other people too--the GI of MA36, geben, weathernerd, soviet narwhal, and hulk hogan to name a few people significant to me personally that he’s carelessly shoved off and made feel miserable.



Now, I’m sure that a lot of you skipped to the bottom and are wondering “gee, why’d drydess spend his wednesday evening writing and sourcing this loving novel,” and believe me I was thinking the same. Well, after some self-reflection I came to the conclusion that I could be sitting here for weeks on end ranting about how celau doxxed me, or how he made a habit of lying to and about me, or how he took credit for the long days of work on the new years build, or how he consistently tried to alienate me from my friends, but the bottom line is that I was grudgingly fine living with celau until he made pretty much everybody in this community I really truly care about feel like stuff about themselves at some point. He brought me to my lowest of lows on two completely separate occasions and his effect on people I care for is deadass one of the main reasons I tried to kill myself. Would love to say that I’m all “oh man I just don’t want this thing to happen to anybody else” but honestly while that may be true to some degree I’m just completely tilted by celau’s gall to harass people like he does, and wanting him to realize every once in a blue moon that the stuff he pulls on people really does make a sizable impact on other people. I’m out

Oh also one last thing PSA to anybody planning on yelling at me for picking on a high school freshman: if you plan on acting like an adult you won’t be given the benefit of the doubt as a child would. No corners cut here



/support grillbys is better





haha what a pathetic lame ass. i gave those assets out of pity for him cause i knew there's no way he could have pull this off. the confidentiality of the add-on (which was basically just a clock + script i ripped already from kalphiter) didn't matter to me cause i knew we weren't gonna be doing new years ever again.

drydess im sorry you had to deal w/ this crater-brained retard


Okay what is the bogpill clique? I'm very interested

actually I just wanna clarify the thing with Celau and me is wrong. What happened is Celau was bugging me to play a game while I was busy doing something and he said some stuff along the lines of "renousim be like: XXXX" I don't remember what he said exactly but I said as a joke "celau be like: why does nobody like me" and then he removed me so I chose to leave schmucks lol.

celau has nothing to say against me other than mummified stuff from the past and cant even give a valid excuse for treating me like the devils rooster sleeve

when this dude gave me the key i was hella grateful until he started dangling it over my head so i would do laps for him and stuff on command

i was gone for half a year and when i came back i was nothing but nice to this guy and he forgets me over all because i wouldnt let him razz people like drydess and hulk hogan's discords

Exhibit D: Violent, sociopathic

I would’ve led with this one but it’s a lot less evidence-based regardless of the claims. Anyways, it’s more about his sociopathic and narcissistic tendencies and actions.

To start, celau got suspended from his high school for choking one of the people there. Since I don’t go to his loving high school or stalk him I’m just assuming based on the fact that he got suspended for a good amount of time that it wasn’t exactly self-defense.
also wtf i completely skimmed over this god damn




its really funny because I was basically one of the first people to be removed by him I think. celau be like "why does nobody like me" then reenacts the loving great purge of 1936-1938. generalisimo celau thins his friends list apparently

raven sona? patrician taste tbh